THE KIEENERS KIDSEI‘ By Ed Orlowski - The grey haired old mpvstart- ed muttering to hiniself as he slashed his looks around the remainsof a banana which sane— _' one had accidentally dropped on the shining mirror-like grey winking floor, and saneone else had ended its life, by squish- ing it inside-out, with a healthy size twelve hunting boot, putting the hulky Trojan roff balance enough tohear him . mutter a few words, well, words that you wouldn't utter to Mom. The old mop had to give a gig- gle when he recalled the inci- dent, and then back to the bus- iness at hand, the old banana trick he thought, as the last traces of the banana vanished from the winking glossy surface. Well, at last, now I can have a rest, I've had my mop in water all without much of a breath and i'm starting to feel water logged, and be- ' sides,my f4agile frame is start- ind torust a bit,__and my handle a needs a drop of oil, to stop it from creeking like a new ‘\ \‘ Who is chief of Campus Police? It seens no one can get Darren Craswell's name right, so here are the 25 closest vers- ions for thoSe who are having trouble: .' Darren Craswell . Darrel Crashwell . Danny Clashwell Donnie Callwell Davy Chasewell - Dennis Crampwell . Dingwell . Daring Dingbat « pair of shoes, I'll get the cleaners attention by dropping a few hairs on the floor,. and when‘ he bends\over to pick them up, he'll notice’my rust, and squeak as my handle canes close to his ear, and so,it worked just like that. The cleaner noticing the strands of lost mp—hair bent over to pick thanup, and low and behold he heard the handle of the mp creek, and took the situation in hand at once, this handle sounds like a newpairofshoeshesaidto ' himself, and look at this frame, its starting to rust too, a-bit of oil will fix everything and ‘ the fluffy greyhaired mp whis- pered in the cleaners ear "see it pays to take a psychology course, even at my age" and he giggled to himself. The cleaner was used to all this silly talk and just kept on giving the old mp the greasies, with an extra spurt for good luck. The closet door was open and the mopettes were almost doing wheelies with laughter at the goings on of a To The Members of The Junior Class: Is it apathy, a lack of I mney, or have people suddenly developed an irrepressible urge to study on Thursday night? You may have askedyourself this if you (one of the few) attended the:,Mason Band last Thursday- night. 'I'he Junior Class executive would sincerely like tokncw i why there was a lack of par- ticipation by the Juniors at this'event; the event was ex- cellent, the band was first grey mad mp and the cleaner. "They seem to make some con- tribution to conversation, even when nothing is going on",all the citizens of the closet ap- plauded, as the cleaner' plunk- ed handscme grey headed mopsie in his usual place beside the spinner pads, and just below the paper that is used in the little boy's and girl's rooms actually no one in the closet laughed at the toilet paper ‘ rolls, as everyone just thought of them as 'bumners" so to say, but they were every bit as im- portant as anyone in the clean— ers closet, all except Gargling Gordie, the bowl brush, he had to take alot mre. It's dinner time now my friendliness time to save energy in the closet, so off goes the 25 watt light and in the distance the cleaner could hear the snoring of the old grey mp, and the giggling of the mpettes, as they chat— tered themselves to sleep. \ . V . ‘_ _‘ ., .V -‘ -_-_‘—-_-——_ , x, _., ‘v_ , . of the band and the mouestion- able supportof the Juniors. Be— 'cause of your absence we have lost a very important source of revenue. WHERE WERE YOU? We would sincerel like to know the reason(s) or the events failure, so that the same thin' g will not occur again. We are extranely disappointed v but are optimistic about the futurebr at least as opti- mistic as can be expectedfiWe hope that you will all get in- volved in future Junior Class activities. Feel free to contact mooqm‘m‘ewmw = a anyofusatanytime., We must wholeheartedly thank all of those people who gave so generously of their time in helping us out at the event— especially the bartenders who their wages to the class the people who worked the door, those who unloaded the band, the poster makers, and the ticket sellers. . One final note-these activ— ities are held for .It‘s your class, your senior week. Please help us to make that week 'an enjoyable one. . Sincerely, James Johnston President Gus Hillstrcm Vice President Lori Lawless Secretary 'Ronalda Murphy Treasurer . Dagwood Hungwell ’ y, y 10 .’chwood Crabapple '/ ll.Derwood .Culligan 12.Daffney Callaghan, . 13.Dogwonder Give-HinbA-Hand . l4.Diefenbaker Talkwell 15.Dwight Walkwell 16.Dilbert Dun‘bell ‘17.DL‘dley Winmvocd 18.Evelyn Woodhead l9.chcar Willie 20.Tony Carroll 21.Mother Theresa 22.Vince Mulligan 23.Yasser.‘Arafat‘ 24.0nar Gadaffi' 25.Anne of Green Gables ‘ rate, and yet the attendance was pathetic. Many students had legitmate excuses for mis- sing the event, but we don't understand why some peOple would rather sit bone and watch reruns on the boob tube and miss one of the most enter— taining bands in the maritimes The purpose of class organ— izatiOn is to raise mney for their-YOUR—senior week. The major source of revenue for classes is one main eventgper year(the maximum allowed by Student Union). At a well ad- vertised general meeting of - ‘ - w the Junior Class, the consensus \_ -- , "~ g ' of those present was that this event would be well attended, because of the caliber