+S$eat
     
    
   
   
    
     
      By
      Matthew
      Dorrell
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Sale»
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Logan
      Airport
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      For
      reasons
      which
      may
      not
      become
     
     
      any
      clearer
      upon
      further
      reading,
     
     
      Seat
      Sale
      appears
      in
      list
      form
      this
     
     
      week,
      rather
      than
      in
      the
      usual
      simu-
     
     
      lation
      of
      prose.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      1.
      I
      hate
      Boston’s
      Logan
      Airport.
     
     
      2.
      The
      failure
      of
      an
      airplane’s
      fuel
     
     
      pump
      is
      unfortunate,
      but
      under-
     
     
      standable.
     
    

    
     
      3.
      Inclement
      weather.
     
    

    
     
      4.
      It
      might
      have
      seemed
      like
      a
      good
     
     
      idea
      at
      the
      time,
      but
      taking
      elevator
     
     
      music
      out
      of
      its
      natural
      habitat
      (the
     
     
      elevator)
      is
      most
      assuredly
      a
      poor
     
     
      idea,
      one
      belonging
      to
      the
      realm
      of
     
     
      poor
      ideas
      best
      exemplified
      by
     
     
      stuffed
      crust
      pizza
      and
      Jimmy
      Ray.
     
     
      5.
      I
      don’t
      care
      how
      much
      you
      work
     
     
      out.
      Button
      your
      damn
      shirt.
     
    

    
     
      6.
      The
      apparent
      inability
      of
      airplane
     
    
   
   
    
     
      -
      employees
      to
      handle
      any
      situation
     
    
   
   
    
     
      which
      is
      even
      slightly
      out
      of
      the
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ‘ordinary,
      despite
      the
      fact
      that
      the
     
    
   
   
    
     
      very
      running
      of
      an
      airline
      defies
     
     
      any
      application
      of
      the
      word
      ordi-
     
     
      nary,
      particularly
      where
      situations
     
     
      are
      involved.
     
    

    
     
      7.
      There
      is
      a
      lounge
      only
      for
      pilots.
     
     
      8.
      Bling.
      Also:
      Bling.
     
    

    
     
      9.
      Though
      an
      airport
      contains
      hun-
     
     
      dreds
      of
      planes,
      many
      of
      which
      are
     
     
      stationary
      for
      long
      periods
      of
      time,
     
    
   
   
    
     
      simply
      taking
      a
      different
      plane
     
     
      when
      one
      breaks
      down
      is
      apparent-
     
     
      ly
      a
      ridiculous
      idea
      which
      brings
     
     
      about
      much
      laughter
      from
      airport
     
     
      staff
      when
      suggested.
     
    

    
     
      10.
      Pilots
      get
      drunk
      in
      the
      lounge
     
     
      only
      for
      pilots.
     
    

    
     
      11.
      After
      the
      album
      Gordon
      the
     
     
      Barenaked
      Ladies
      began
      a
      downhill
     
     
      slide
      which
      has
      become
      so
      steep
      it
     
     
      may
      actually
      be
      a
      free-fall.
     
    

    
     
      12.
      No
      one
      seems
      to
      think
      that
     
     
      lounges
      only
      for
      pilots
      (AKA
     
     
      pilots’
      lounges),
      where
      pilots
      get
     
     
      drunk,
      are
      a
      bad
      idea.
     
    

    
     
      13.
      The
      monotony
      of
      the
      colour
     
     
      green.
     
    

    
     
      14.
      Flight
      attendants
      are
      mad,
      mad,
     
     
      mad
      at
      the
      world.
     
    

    
     
      15.
      The
      meek
      are
      taking
      their
      time
     
     
      inheriting
      the
      earth.
     
    

    
     
      16.
      The
      failure
      of
      an
      airplane’s
     
     
      backup
      fuel
      pump
      is
      more
      unfortu-
     
     
      nate
      and
      less
      understandable
      than
     
     
      the
      failure
      of
      the
      first.
     
    

    
     
      17.
      The
      general
      and
      thunderous
     
     
      incompetence
      of
      the
      human
      race.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      18.
      Pretzels.
     
    

    
     
      19.
      If
      I
      were
      to
      give
      you
      the
      choice
     
     
      between
      buying
      two
      bottles
      of
      an
     
     
      indigestible
      brown
      liquid,
      would
     
     
      you
      pay
      75
      cents
      more
      for
      one
      just
     
     
      because
      it
      had
      a
      different
      picture?
     
     
      Me
      neither.
     
    

    
     
      20.
      Long
      live
      noname
      cola.
     
    

    
     
      21.
      A
      cholera
      infested
      ditch
      in
     
     
      Papua
      New
      Guinea.
     
    

    
     
      22.
      The
      Chalupé:
      Quality
      content
     
     
      for
      apathetic,
      ignorant,
      [Deleted-
     
     
      Ed.|
     
    

    
     
      23.
      Planes
      are
      really
      much
      too
      big
     
     
      to
      fly.
      I
      don’t
      believe
      in
      air-travel.
     
     
      Or
      boats
      made
      of
      metal.
     
    

    
     
      24.
      Would
      you
      believe
      it
      would
     
     
      take
      ten
      hours
      to
      fix
      an
      airplane’s
     
     
      fuel
      pump?
     
    

    
     
      25.
      Welcome
      to
      Boston’s
      Logan
     
     
      Airport.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Next
      Issue:
      Cadre
      _
      Poetry
     
     
      Spectacular.
      Send
      us
      your
      poems.
      It
     
     
      will
      cure
      those
      nagging
      feelings
      of
     
     
      utter
      worthlessness
      that
      have
      been
     
     
      plaguing
      you.
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      38
     
     
      fees:
     
     
      +
      58@
     
    
   
   
    
     
      2
     
     
      Bayt
      4
     
    
   
   
    
     
      techpei
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ENABLING
      THE
      NEW
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      St@rt-Up
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      2001
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Business
      Plan
      Competition
     
    
   
   
    
     
         
     
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      EGE?
     
     
      a@
      [sland
     
    
   
   
    
     
      CANADA
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Technology
      PEI
      invites
      Island
      entrepreneurs
      to
      participate
      in
      St@rt-
      Up
      Challenge
      2001,
      an
     
     
      e-Business
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      Competition
      to
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      in
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      with
      IT
      Week.
      IT
      Week,
      an
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      of
      the
      Information
      Technologies
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      of
      PEI,
      will
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      May
      4
      to
      13,
      2001.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      St@rt-Up
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      will
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      Prince
      Edward
      Island
      entrepreneurs
     
     
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      technology
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      Winning
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      with
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      as
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      act
      upon
      their
      business
      ideas.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      St@rt-Up
      Challenge
      2001
      is
      open
      to
      all
      residents
      of
      Prince
      Edward
      Island.
      Entries
      will
      be
     
     
      judged
      in
      two
      categories
      (1)
      student,
      including
      high
      school,
      college,
      university,
      and
      private
     
     
      institutions
      (2)
      new
      or
      existing
      businesses.
      For
      full
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      details,
      eligibility
      require-
     
     
      ments,
      rules
      and
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      pick
      up
      the
      St@rt-Up
      Challenge
      Registration
      Kit
      at
      the
      Technology
     
     
      PEI.
      office
      in
      Charlottetown.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      The
      deadline
      for
      submission
      of
      business
      summaries
      is
      5:00
      pm
      March
      23,
      2001.
      Participants
     
     
      may
      enter
      the
      competition
      online
      at
      the
      Web
      site,
      by
      mail
      to
      Technology
      PEI
      or
      by
      delivery
      to
     
     
      the
      Technology
      PEI
      office.
      :
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Supporting
      Sponsors:
     
    

    
     
      a
      oe
     
     
      Microrse
      CO
      Aifiing
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      :
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      sland
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      an
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      Official
      Dates:
     
     
      The
      following
      table
      indicates
      the
      official
      key
      dates
      associated
     
     
      with
      the
      St@rt-Up
      Challenge:
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Phase
      I
      Open
      Submission
      of
     
     
      Business
      Summaries
      Monday,
      March
      5
     
     
      Close
      Submission
      of
     
     
      Business
      Summaries
      Friday,
      March
      23
     
     
      Announce
      Three
      Finalists
      Friday,
      March
      30
     
     
      Phase
      II
      Open
      Submission
      of
     
     
      Full
      Business
      Plan
      Monday,
      April
      2
     
     
      Close
      Submission
      of
     
     
      Full
      Business
      Plan
      Friday,
      April
      27
     
     
      Close
      Preliminary
      Judging
     
     
      of
      Full
      Business
      Plans
      Thursday,
      May
      3
     
     
      Phase
      Ill
      Pitch
      Sessions
      Friday,
      May
      4
     
     
      Awards
      Ceremony
      Thursday,
      May
      10
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      For
      more
      information,
      visit
      the
      St@rt-Up
      Challenge
     
     
      Web
      site,
      at
      www.
      peistartupchallenge.com,
      email
      us
      at
     
     
      info@peistartupchallenge.com
      or
      contact:
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Lee
      Brammer
     
    

    
     
      Technology
      PEI
     
    

    
     
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      Floor
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      Building,
      25
      University
      Avenue
     
     
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      Box
      910,
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      PE
      C1A7L9
     
    

    
     
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      368-5961/
      Fax:
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      ‘o
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