In
      the
      latter
      part
      of
      Grade
      Seven
      I
      had
      the
      chance
      to
     
     
      make
      a
      television
      commercial.
      I
      had
      been
      all
      excited
     
     
      and
      thought
      maybe
      I
      could
      become
      a
      model.
      I
      was
     
     
      always
      seeing
      the
      teenaged
      models
      in
      magazines
      and
     
     
      thought
      why
      not.
      I
      enjoyed
      the
      attention
      that
      was
     
     
      showered
      on
      me
      everytime
      the
      kids
      at
      school
      saw
      the
     
     
      commercial
      and
      the
      man
      who
      had
      gotten
      me
      the
      spot
     
     
      on
      the
      commercial
      said
      I
      would
      be
      able
      to
      do
      more.
      I
     
     
      remember
      reading
      somewhere
      that
      the
      camera
      adds
      ten
     
     
      pounds
      so
      I
      figured
      I
      would
      lose
      weight
      but
      I
      wasn't
     
     
      very
      good
      at
      sticking
      to
      diets
      so
      I
      just
      stopped
      eating,
     
     
      what
      was
      the
      sense
      of
      eating
      if
      I
      couldn’t
      eat
      the
     
     
      things
      I
      wanted.
      Of
      course
      supper
      posed
      a
      problem
     
     
      because
      I
      was
      forced
      to
      eat
      mean
      I
      couldn’t
      very
     
     
      well
      say
      I
      was
      never
      hungry.
      My
      mother
      might
      sus-
     
     
      pect
      that
      I
      was
      fasting.
      As
      it
      turns
      out
      I
      found
      out
     
     
      somewhere
      that
      you
      could
      eat
      your
      cake
      and
      not
      have
     
     
      it
      too,
      so
      to
      speak.
      If
      I
      ate
      just
      a
      little
      bit
      of
      supper
     
     
      complain
      I
      was
      full
      I
      would
      then
      be
      allowed
      to
      leave
     
     
      the
      kitchen
      without
      eating
      all
      my
      supper.
      I
      would
      then
     
     
      go
      to
      the
      bathroom
      and
      stick
      my
      finger
      in
      my
      throat
     
     
      to
      throw
      up
      the
      little
      supper
      that
      I
      did
      eat.
      I
      got
      really
     
     
      good
      at
      this
      and
      after
      a
      while
      I
      could
      throw
      up
      by
      just
     
     
      thinking
      about
      it,
      maybe
      I
      was
      too
      good
      at
      it.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      In
      Grade
      Eight
      I
      was
      eating
      nothing
      and
      throwing
      up
     
     
      if
      late
      as
      muchas
      a
      potato
      chip.
      One
      night
      we
      had
     
     
      spaghetti
      for
      supper
      which
      incidently
      was
      my
      down-
     
     
      fall
      (and
      stillis).
      late
      everything
      on
      my
      plate,
      a
     
     
      friend
      was
      spending
      the
      night
      and
      she
      had
      no
      idea
     
     
      about
      my
      ‘*
      weight
      loss
      program’’
      and
      as
      it
      turned
      out
     
     
      I
      didn’t
      get
      a
      chance
      to
      do
      my
      usual
      routine.
      The
      next
     
     
      morning
      very
      early
      I
      woke
      up
      getting
      sick
      to
      my
     
     
      stomach
      and
      I
      couldn’t
      stop.
      When
      it
      subsided
      briefly
     
     
      |
      asked
      my
      friend
      to
      get
      me
      a
      drink
      of
      juice
      which
     
     
      sent
      my
      stomach
      in
      another
      fit.
      I
      couldn’t
      hold
      any-
     
     
      thing
      in
      my
      stomach
      not
      even
      a
      glass
      of
      juice.
      I
      ended
     
     
      up
      in
      the
      hospital
      and
      was
      unconscious
      for
      most
      of
     
     
      my
      stay.
      I
      was
      there
      for
      a
      month
      and
      IJ
      almost
      died.
      I
     
     
      almost
      died
      to
      be
      thin.
      Ironically,
      just
      before
      I
      went
     
     
      into
      the
      hospital
      I
      had
      gotten
      my
      long
      hair
      cut
      short.
     
     
      The
      guy
      who
      got
      me
      the
      commercial
      said
      ‘*‘he
      didn’t
     
     
      like
      it,
      |
      looked
      like
      a
      boy.’’
      I
      only
      got
      one
      modelling
     
     
      job
      after
      that.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      I
      have
      never
      stopped
      eating
      or
      purged
      again
      although
     
     
      even
      up
      until
      my
      first
      year
      at
      UPEI.
      I
      worea
      lady’s
     
     
      size
      3.
      Then
      I
      went
      to
      a
      size
      5.
      I
      am
      now
      at
      size
      7
     
    

    
     
      ~
      where
      |
      intend
      to
      stay.
      It
      was
      a
      hard
      decision
      to
      make
     
    
   
   
    
     
      UPEI
      X-P
      RESS
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      January
      23,
      1992
     
    
   
   
    
     
        
     
     
        
     
     
        
     
     
        
     
     
         
     
    
   
   
    
     
      last
      fall
      when
      I
      had
      to
      buy
      new
      pants.
      I
      entertained
     
     
      the
      idea
      of
      going
      ona
      diet
      but
      decided
      against
      it.
      I’m
      |
     
     
      not
      fat
      so
      why
      should
      I
      diet.
      Besides
      diets
      scare
      me
     
     
      and
      I
      have
      a
      good
      reason
      to
      be
      scared.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Being
      thin
      is
      not
      important,
      it
      took
      me
      eight
      years
      to
      |
     
     
      learn
      that
      being
      satisfied
      with
      my
      ownbodyismore
      |
     
     
      important
      than
      someone
      else
      being
      satisfied
      by
      the
     
     
      look
      of
      my
      body.
      If
      they
      don’t
      like
      the
      way
      I
      look,
     
     
      they
      can
      look
      away.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Anonymous
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ‘“‘T’m
      just
      a
      person
     
     
      trapped
      inside
      a
     
     
      woman’s
      body.”
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Elaine
      Boosler
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Eating
      Disorders
      strike
      many
     
    
   
   
    
     
      women
     
     
      by
      Elaine
      Bellio
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ‘*The
      statistics
      on
      who
      is
      affected
      by
      eating
      disorde
     
     
      and
      weight
      preoccupation
      are
      appalling,’’
      says
      Ruth
     
     
      Pentinga,
      founder
      of
      the
      Women’s
      Body
      Images
      ~
     
     
      Support
      Group
      at
      York.
      One
      of
      three
      percent
      in
      No)
     
     
      America
      have
      anorexia,
      3
      to
      5
      percent
      have
      bulimia)
     
     
      and
      another
      10
      to
      20
      percent
      engage
      in
      some
      of
      the
     
     
      symptoms
      on
      as
      occasional
      basis.
      Anorexia
      is
      char
     
     
      terised
      by
      a
      fear
      of
      weight
      gain
      and
      the
      relentless
      —
      et
     
     
      pursuit
      of
      thinness
      through
      restrictive
      dieting.
     
     
      Bulimia
      involves
      acycle
      of
      binge
      eating,
      followedt)
     
     
      purging
      to
      getrid
      if
      unwanted
      calories.
      Vomiting,
      |
     
     
      laxative
      abuse,
      fasting
      and
      excessive
      exercise
      are
      |
     
     
      common
      purging
      methods.
      Both
      anorexia
      and
      bulim
      i
     
     
      can
      have
      severe
      physical
      and
      emotional
      effects.
      In
     
     
      to
      20
      per
      cent
      of
      cases
      they
      can
      be
      fatal.
      ‘‘We
      ‘vel
      V
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Page
      |