SEPTEMBER
      27,
      2005
     
    
   
   
    
     
      THE
      CADRE
      @
      5
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      OPINION
      &
      COMMENTARY
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Bathroom
      Review:
      Women’s
      Point
      of
      View
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Inez
      Fitzpatrick
     
     
      Contributor
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Last
      year
      two
      very
      creative
     
     
      writers
      for
      The
      Cadre
      took
      up
      the
     
     
      interesting
      task
      of
      examining
      several
     
     
      male
      washrooms
      around
      campus.
     
     
      Some
      of
      the
      bathrooms
      seemed
      rather
     
     
      gross,
      or
      odd...odd
      being
      the
      best
     
     
      word
      to
      describe
      the
      normal
      state
      of
     
     
      affairs
      at
      UPEI.
     
    

    
     
      This
      year,
      I
      am
      proposing
      a
     
     
      newer
      extended
      approach
      to
      Kimberley
     
     
      Johnston’s
      version
      Examining
      Female
     
     
      Washrooms.
      I’ve
      never
      really
      had
      much
     
     
      experience
      with
      male
      washrooms,
     
     
      except
      for
      this
      one
      time,
      but
      I
      can
     
     
      propose
      to
      you
      right
      now
      that
      us
     
     
      women
      may
      look
      clean,
      but
      you
     
     
      wouldn’t
      know
      it
      from
      our
      bathrooms.
     
    

    
     
      Even
      I
      dread
      the
      women’s
     
     
      bathroom.
      The
      sight
      of
      used
      sanitary
     
     
      napkins
      and
      tampons
      sticking
      to
      the
     
     
      toilet
      bowl
      and
      other
      random
      areas
      is
     
     
      not
      even
      the
      worst
      of
      it.
      I
      know
      what
     
     
      you
      are
      thinking
      girls,
      “The
      garbage
     
     
      outside
      the
      stall
      makes
      it
      embarrassing
     
     
      to
      put
      it
      in
      the
      trash,
      I
      might
      get
      seen.”
     
     
      True,
      but
      its
      better
      than
      having
      us
     
     
      investigators
      send
      it
      off
      to
      the
      Science
     
     
      lab
      to
      trace
      DNA!
      Yes,
      we
      really
      do
     
     
      that
      -
      just
      so
      you
      first
      years
      know!
     
    

    
     
      I
      decided
      to
      start
      my
     
     
      examination
      of
      the
      girl’s
      washroom
     
     
      outside
      The
      Wave.
      Not
      too
      bad
     
     
      looking,
      the
      janitor
      must
      have
      just
     
     
      cleaned
      it
      up
      again.
      What
      really
     
     
      annoyed
      me,
      however,
      were
      the
     
     
      posters
      advertising
      yeast
      infections
      with
     
     
      a
      girl
      turning
      into
      a
      monster.
      “Don’t
      feel
     
     
      like
      a
      freak
      because
      you
      have
      a
      yeast
     
     
      infection...”
      Hello!
      I
      feel
      like
      a
      freak
     
    

    
     
      just
      having
      to
      look
      at
      this.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Walking
      to
      the
      next
      stall
      was
     
     
      worse.
      The
      same
      poster,
      only
      a
      different
     
     
      picture
      and
      a
      baby
      pink
      background.
     
     
      Oh
      how
      I
      feel
      pretty!
      Then
      while
      I
      was
     
     
      washing
      my
      hands,
      I
      noticed
      another
     
     
      poster
      next
      to
      the
      mirror.
      Suddenly
      the
     
     
      zit
      I
      barely
      noticed
      this
      morning
      was
     
     
      sticking
      out
      like
      the
      monster’s
      green
     
     
      nose.
      Seriously,
      you
      want
      us
      to
      feel
     
     
      beautiful
      by
      promoting
      yeast
      infections
     
     
      as
      a
      curse.
      Smart
      one!
     
    

    
     
      So
      yes,
      women’s
      washrooms
     
     
      are
      just
      as
      abnormal
      as
      the
      men’s
      are.
     
     
      Next
      week.
      ..Main
      building...
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      How
      do
      you
      like
      your
      Cadre?
     
     
      Like
      the
      new
      look?
     
     
      Did
      something
      piss
      you
      off?
     
     
      Want
      to
      see
      more
      of
      ...?
     
     
      Bored
      out
      of
      your
      mind?
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Then
      email
      us!
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ...
      And
      Now
      For
      Something
      Completely
     
     
      Different:
      The
      Rants
      of
      a
      University
      Student
     
    
   
   
    
     
           
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Ryan
      Gallant
     
     
      Contibutor
     
    
   
   
    
     
      An
      era
      came
      to
      an
      end
      on
      September
     
     
      25"
      when
      Subway
      Restaurants
      finished
     
     
      phasing
      out
      their
      stamp
      coupons.
      Now,
     
     
      instead
      of
      stamps,
      in
      return
      for
      enduring
     
     
      the
      long
      line,
      paying
      for
      obscenely
     
     
      expensive
      subs
      and
      reeking
      of
      Subway
     
     
      for
      the
      rest
      of
      the
      day
      you
      get...nothing.
     
     
      No
      free
      cookies
      on
      Friday,
      no
      super
     
     
      value
      meal
      on
      Wednesday.
      Personally,
     
     
      I’ve
      been
      pissed
      at
      Subway
      since
      they
     
     
      switched
      from
      Pepsi
      to
      Coke,
      but
      really;
     
     
      this
      is
      ridiculous.
      Eat
      Fresh?
      Kiss
      my
     
     
      ass
      Jared.
     
    

    
     
      Relief
      came
      on
      international
      front
     
     
      last
      week
      as
      Canada
      and
      Denmark
     
     
      agreed
      to
      sit
      down
      and
      talk
      about
      who
     
     
      possesses
      sovereignty
      over
      Hans
      Island
     
     
      in
      the
      Arctic.
      Tempers
      had
      been
      rising
     
     
      in
      both
      countries
      since
      Canada’s
     
     
      Defence
      Minister
      Bill
      Graham
      landed
     
     
      on
      the
      disputed
      island
      in
      July
      with
     
     
      Canadian
      Forces
      troops
      to
      plant
      a
     
     
      Canadian
      flag.
      In
      retaliation
      the
      Danes
     
     
      sent
      a
      warship
      to
      sail
      around
      the
      island
     
     
      for
      awhile
      and
      to
      erect
      a
      Danish
      flag
      on
     
     
      the
      island.
      “We
      put
      one
      up
      before
      but
      it
     
     
      blew
      down.”
      was
      their
      reasoning.
     
     
      World
      leaders
      were
      shocked
      and
      the
     
     
      US
      Military
      reportedly
      went
      to
     
     
      DEFCON
      5
      when
      they
      heard
      that
      the
     
     
      great
      military
      powers
      of
      Canada
      and
     
     
      Denmark
      were
      having
      a
      dispute,
     
     
      especially
      after
      hearing
      that
      at
      least
      two
     
     
      Canadian
      submarines
      were
      almost
     
     
      operational.
      ““Thank
      God
      that’s
      over.”
     
     
      Was
      reportedly
      the
      reaction
      of
      Saddam
     
     
      Hussein
      from
      his
      jail
      cell
      upon
      hearing
     
     
      the
      news.
      Hans
      Island,
      by
      the
      way,
      is
     
     
      1.3
      square
      kilometres
      and
      is
      entirely
     
     
      uninhabited.
      Oh
      yeah.
      And
      the
      North
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Koreans
      are
      giving
      up
      their
      nuclear
     
     
      weapons
      program.
      Riiight.
     
    

    
     
      Elections
      were
      held
      for
      the
     
     
      German
      Bundestag
      last
      Sunday,
      and
      no
     
     
      one
      seems
      to
      know
      who
      won.
      Both
     
     
      leading
      parties
      were
      considerably
      shy
     
     
      of
      the
      307
      needed
      for
      a
      majority.
     
     
      Negotiations
      have
      been
      on-going
      with
     
     
      other
      parties
      in
      attempts
      of
      establishing
     
     
      some
      sort
      of
      governing
      coalition,
      but
     
     
      the
      two
      major
      party
      leaders
      have
      going
     
     
      postal
      on
      each
      other
      all
      week,
      everyone
     
     
      refuses
      to
      even
      talk
      to
      the
      Left
      Party
     
     
      (successor
      of
      the
      old
      East
      German
     
     
      Communists),
      and
      one
      of
      the
      coalitions
     
     
      has
      been
      dubbed
      “The
      Jamaican
     
     
      Coalition.”
      Oh
      those
      crazy
      Germans.
     
     
      They’re
      not
      that
      good
      at
      this
      democracy
     
     
      stuff.
      Or
      at
      taking
      over
      the
      world.
     
    

    
     
      Residents
      of
      Newark,
      New
     
     
      Jersey
      became
      mildly
      concerned
      last
     
     
      week
      when
      it
      was
      reported
      that
      three
     
     
      mice
      infected
      with
      the
      Bubonic
      Plague
     
     
      had
      gone
      missing
      from
      a
      University
      of
     
     
      Medicine
      and
      Dentistry
      laboratory,
     
     
      prompting
      University
      Officials
      to
      spring
     
     
      into
      action
      and
      do...absolutely
      nothing.
     
     
      According
      to
      them
      the
      mice
      posed
      a
     
     
      “scant”
      threat
      to
      the
      general
      public
      and
     
     
      besides,
      since
      they
      had
      already
      been
     
     
      missing
      for
      about
      two
      weeks,
      they
      were
     
     
      “probably
      already
      dead
      anyway.”
     
     
      Now,
      I
      have
      a
      great
      respect
      for
      the
     
     
      research
      community,
      don’t
      get
      me
     
     
      wrong.
      But
      in
      my
      opinion,
      it’s
      pretty
     
     
      stupid
      to
      handle
      test
      subjects
      so
     
     
      haphazardly
      that
      they
      go
      missing
      for
      two
     
     
      weeks
      without
      you
      noticing,
      especially
     
     
      when
      these
      subjects
      happen
      to
      be