You’ll
      Never
      Pee
      In
      This
      Town
      Again
     
    
   
   
    
     
      by
      Stephan
      MACLEOD
     
    
   
   
    
     
      This
      summer
      a
      group
      of
      city
     
     
      boys
      from
      Charlottetown’s
      bar
      scene
     
     
      joined
      forces
      to
      harvest
      a
      new
      wave
     
     
      of
      roots
      and
      folk
      music.
      Members
      of
     
     
      Eyes
      For
      Telescopes
      Pat
      Deighan,
     
     
      Mike
      MacDougall,
      Dan
      Currie,
      and
     
     
      Craig
      MacPherson
      teamed
      up
      with
     
     
      Dennis
      Ellsworth
      of
      the
      Rude
     
     
      Mechanicals,
      John
      Mullins,
      Lindsay
     
     
      Victor,
      and
      Steve
      Balderston
      (or
     
     
      Buzzy)
      in
      his
      apartment
      across
      from
     
     
      the
      Charlottetown
      Recreation
      Centre
     
     
      for
      a
      season’s
      worth
      of
      drinking
      and
     
     
      rustic
      jam
      sessions.
      These
      weekly
      col-
     
     
      laborations
      resulted
      in
      a
      new
      group
     
     
      emerging
      in
      town
      named
      after
      their
     
     
      favourite
      day
      to
      _
      practice:
      The
     
     
      Tuesdays.
     
    

    
     
      Since
      the
      band
      is
      comprised
     
     
      of
      so
      many
      musicians
      from
      other
     
     
      bands,
      comparisons
      to
      Sydney’s
      The
     
     
      Squatters
      (made
      up
      of
      Slowcoaster
     
     
      and
      Rock
      Ranger)
      are
      inevitable.
      “T
     
     
      didn’t
      even
      know
      that
      stuff
      (The
     
     
      Squatters)
      was
      going
      on,
      but
      Jay
     
     
      (Smith)
      from
      Rock
      Ranger
      made
      fun
     
     
      of
      me
      pretty
      bad
      one
      night
      for
      putting
     
     
      the
      country
      band
      together;
      I
      was
      like
     
     
      ‘At
      least
      we
      can
      actually
      play
      our
     
     
      instruments,’
      says
      drummer
      Mike
     
     
      MacDougall.
     
    

    
     
      What
      was
      intended
      to
      be
      a
     
     
      traditional
      country
      music.
      project
     
     
      playing
      vintage
      folk
      songs
      trans-
     
     
      formed
      into
      a
      less
      serious
      posse
      of
     
     
      partiers
      and
      musicians.
      The
      band’s
     
     
      collection
      of
      original
      songs
      reflects
     
     
      their
      light-hearted
      approach
      to
      the
     
     
      genre
      of
      country
      music.
      “It’s
      kind
      of
     
     
      hard
      to
      write
      about
      tumbleweeds
      and
     
     
      gunfights
      when
      we
      never
      actually
     
    
   
   
    
     
      experienced
      those
      things,”
      says
      Mike.
      .
     
    
   
   
    
     
      “We
      just
      sing
      about
      being
     
     
      drunk
      at
      Buzzy’s,”
      says
      Dan.
     
    

    
     
      Pat
      thinks
      the
      foolish
      atmos-
     
     
      phere
      of
      the
      group
      is
      what
      drove
      away
     
     
      lap
      steel
      guitar
      player
      John
      Mullins
     
     
      earlier
      this
      summer.
      Mike
      explains
     
     
      John’s
      disappearance:
      “John
      had
      the
     
     
      idea
      for
      us
      to
      do
      a
      show
      opening
      for
     
     
      Eyes
      For
      Telescopes.
      Then
      the
      day
      of
     
     
      the
      show
      he
      _
      took
      off
      to
     
     
      Newfoundland.”
     
    

    
     
      “We
      didn’t
      see
      him
      for
      a
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Mike
      MacDougall
      was
      alt-country
      way
      before
      anyone
      else.
      Way
      to
      go
      Mike!
     
    
   
   
    
     
      month,”
      says
      Pat.
     
    

    
     
      “He
      didn’t
      tell
      anyone
      he
      was
     
     
      going,
      either,”
      adds
      Steve.
      In
      John’s
     
     
      mysterious
      absence,
      Steve
      wrote
      the
     
     
      song
      “Where
      Oh
      Where
      is
      John?”
     
    

    
     
      John
      eventually
      returned
     
     
      from
      Newfoundland
      and
      rejoined
      the
     
     
      group.
      Anyone
      who
      has
      seen
      multiple
     
     
      performances
      of
      the
      band
      can
      attest
      to
     
     
      the
      inconsistencies
      of
      the
      number
      of
     
     
      musicians
      on
      stage
      at
      different
      shows.
     
     
      Mike,
      Steve,
      Pat,
      Dennis,
      and
     
     
      Lindsay
      played
      the
      first
      show
      without
     
     
      John.
      Dan
      and
      Craig
      played
      their
      sec-
     
     
      ond’
      show
      along
      with
      fiddle
      player
     
     
      Don
      Campbell.
      And
      by
      the
      end
      of
      the
     
     
      summer,
      John
      had
      returned,
      and
     
     
      Kristina
      Fourgeron
      added
      some
      back
     
     
      up
      vocals.
      Mike
      explains
      the
      varying
     
     
      line
      up:
      “Whoever’s
      not
      doing
      jail
     
     
      time
      plays
      with
      us.”
     
    

    
     
      Now
      that
      Dennis
      Ellsworth
     
     
      has
      left
      to
      Toronto
      with
      The
      Rude
     
     
      Mechanicals,
      the
      band
      faces
      another
     
     
      change
      in
      line
      up.
      When
      asked
      what’s
     
     
      next
      for
      the
      band,
      Pat
      comments,
      “We
     
     
      should
      ask
      Dennis
      what
      our
      next
      plan
     
     
      IS.:
     
    

    
     
      Mike
      says,
      “I
      think
      we’re
     
     
      going
      to
      have
      a
      meeting,
      get
      a
      speak-
     
     
      erphone
      and
      discuss
      everything
      with
     
     
      Dennis.”
     
    
   
   
    
     
      “We
      can
      do
      live
     
     
      shows
      with
      Dennis
      via
      satelite,”
      adds
     
     
      Dan.
     
    

    
     
      Pat
      seems
      to
      think
      that
      the
     
     
      relocation
      of
      The
      Rude
      Mechanicals
     
     
      to
      Toronto
      is
      part
      of
      some
      sort
      of
      con-
     
     
      spiracy.
      “Dennis
      took
      the
      Rudes
      to
     
     
      Toronto
      so
      he
      could
      get
      rid
      of
      them
      all
     
     
      by
      getting
      them
      hooked
      on
      drugs
      or
     
     
      shot.”
      Mike
      explains
      that
      this
      will
      fur-
     
     
      ther
      the
      career
      of
      The
      Tuesdays.
     
    

    
     
      If
      Dennis
      isn’t
      successful
      in
     
     
      getting
      rid
      of
      the
      rest
      of
      The
      Rude
     
     
      Mechanicals,
      Dan
      is
      confident
      that
     
     
      Matt
      MacQuaid
      will
      probably
      end
      up
     
     
      replacing
      Master
      T
      and
      become
      the
     
     
      new
      host
      of
      Da
      Mix.
     
    

    
     
      Pat
      then
      adds
      that
      he
      thinks
     
     
      “Dennis
      is
      trying
      to
      get
      Frozen
      Ghost
     
     
      back
      together
      again.”
     
    

    
     
      Before
      Dennis
      left
      for
     
     
      Toronto
      to
      reunite
      bands
      from
      the
     
     
      eighties,
      he
      recorded
      an
      album
      with
     
     
      The
      Tuesdays.
      In
      between
      trips
      to
      the
     
     
      local
      bootlegger,
      the
      band
      managed
      to
     
     
      put
      their
      music
      to
      disc
      over
      three
      long
     
     
      nights
      of
      recording.
      Dan
      complains,
     
     
      “One
      night
      we
      were
      there
      until
      eight
     
     
      in
      the
      fucking
      morning.”
      The
      extend-
     
     
      ed
      recording
      sessions
      paid
      off,
      and
     
     
      now
      the
      band
      has
      a
      fine
      disc
      of
      moon-
     
    
   
   
    
     
      _shine-soaked
      songs
      to
      show
      for
      their
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Mechanical
      caught
      being
      rude.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      summer
      of
      jamming
      and
      drinking.
     
    

    
     
      For
      the
      release
      of
      their
      CD,
     
     
      Build
      a
      Horse,
      and
      final
      show
      with
     
     
      Dennis,
      The
      Tuesdays
      played
      com-
     
     
      pletly
      shit-faced
      at
      Brennan’s.
      “We
     
     
      started
      spitting
      beer
      over
      each
      other,”
     
     
      says
      Pat,
      “I
      couldn’t
      spray
      either,
      so
      I
     
     
      remember
      just
      hitting
      Steve
      off
      the
     
     
      back
      of
      the
      head.”
      At
      one
      point
      it
      was-
     
     
      n’t
      just
      beer
      that
      the
      band
      was
      spit-
     
     
      ting.
      Pat
      says,
      “John
      has
      a
      history
      of
     
     
      filling
      large
      draft
      glasses
      from
     
     
      Brennan’s
      with
      piss.”
     
    

    
     
      “On
      stage,”
      Mike
      adds.
     
    

    
     
      “Then
      Dennis
      drank
      it,
      think-
     
     
      ing
      it
      was
      whiskey
      and
      water,”
      says
     
     
      Pat.
     
    

    
     
      “So
      any
      girls
      that
      smooched
     
     
      Dennis
      on
      that
      wednesday
      night...”
     
     
      Mike
      begins
      to
      say
      without
      any
      need
     
     
      to
      finish
      the
      thought.
     
    

    
     
      When
      asked
      whether
      urinat-
     
     
      ing
      on
      stage
      will
      affect
      the
      band’s
     
     
      chances
      of
      ever
      playing
      at
      Brennan’s
     
     
      again,
      Mike
      says,
      “When
      you’re
      a
     
     
      band
      of
      our
      magnitude
      with
      that
      many
     
     
      megastars
      on
      stage,
      you
      can
      do
      what-
     
     
      ever
      the
      hell
      you
      want.”
     
    

    
     
      Pat
      says,
      “You
      should
      put
      the
     
     
      title
      of
      this
      article,
      “You’ll
      Never
      Pee
      —
     
     
      In
      This
      Town
      Again.’”
     
    

    
     
      Done.
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      6
     
    
   
   
    
     
      the
      cadre