room-mate 
     
     around since 
     
     i established 
     
    
   
   
    
     it possible to 
     
    
   
   
    
     student. Bill 
     
     a technique 
     
     ‘Oid fish .tank 
     
    
   
   
    
     of action en- 
     
    
   
   
    
     results the 
     
     placed in the 
     
     lid should be 
     
     and .a varie- 
     
     method is 
     
     he raw terror 
     
    
   
   
    
     an all night 
     
     are serious 
     
     nyou should 
     
    
   
   
    
     Your room- 
     
    
   
   
    
     as with the  
     
    
   
   
    
     Imals are fed , 
     
    
   
   
    
     ‘Or snacksor  - 
     
    
   
   
    
     puaah 
     
    
   
   
    
     , roommate 
     
    
   
   
    
     Sunday meals. If your room-mate 
     
    
   
   
    
     .persists in his habit of returning to 
     
    
   
   
    
     your room to live. floodlights 
     
     should be added to the aquarium 
     
     to provide night viewing of the rep- 
     
     tiles. - 
     
    

    
     Remember. don't be unfair to 
     
     him. he’s been working night and 
     
     day for several years to carve out a 
     
     place for himself at university. 
     
     Maybe he is simply a little shy for 
     
     the first seven months. . 
     
    

    
     if these techniques don't work. 
     
     look at him with an objective, open 
     
     mind and put him in one of the 
     
     following categories: V 
     
     a. shy -— the type who only talks 
     
     on weekends and civic holidays. 
     
     b. backward —- the type who can’t 
     
     maintain a cohversation with a 
     
     telephone operator. 
     
    
   
   
    
     c.‘unpopular - the type who» 
     
     ,doesn't even get junk mail. 
     
    
   
   
    
     Any one of these characteristics 
     
     can be used to your advantage. 
     
    

    
     if you have no scruples at all 
     
     simply begin by removing his per- 
     
     sonal belongings over a period of 
     
     several days. Start with his bed as 
     
     this is what makes him return to 
     
     the room each night. By bringing in 
     
     a ping pong table for your personal 
     
     use, start to lay the format for the 
     
     renovation of the room. 
     
     Throughout the week. remove fix- 
     
     tures and mirrors or; his side of the 
     
     room. Make sure that all damages 
     
     are reported to the dean of 
     
     residences and ,that the respon- 
     
     sibility form is signed with your 
     
     room-mate's forged signature and 
     
     falsely witnessed by the guy across 
     
     the hall. Using a razorblade, cut the 
     
     carpet out of his side of the room 
     
     so that in the morning when he 
     
     gets up off the ping pong table his 
     
     bare foot hits the sub-zero tile. 
     
    

    
     A Queen’s Psychology major 
     
     (who we will call Mr. F.B.) says that 
     
    
   
   
    
     ' he overcame the problem of room— - 
     
    
   
   
    
     mate elimination during his first 
     
    
   
   
    
     ' year. “‘Oh yeah.,| remember my 
     
    
   
   
    
     room-mate Sam," he says proudly. 
     
     “i had a new room-mate by 
     
     Thanksgiving”. Mr. F. B., a corn- 
     
     pulsive napkin writer from way 
     
     back. summarized (on a serviette) 
     
     what he called the “klepto 
     
     method"; - , 
     
     This method requires th 
     
    
   
   
    
     ‘ removal of one's own personal 
     
    
   
   
    
     belongings, an interesting reversal 
     
     of roles. By hiding his most 
     
     treasured possessions and by giv- 
     
     ing away his deodorant. 
     
     toothpaste. etc., Mr. F.B. created 
     
     valid grounds for falsely accusing 
     
     his room-mate of being one who 
     
    
   
   
    
      things unconsciously ('klep- 
     
    
   
   
    
     >%'I:heICa~c1F>1-er, November 25, 1976 page 7. 
     
    
   
   
    
     Solurnoh 
     
    
   
   
    
     tomaniac). By spreading vicious 
     
     rumours to his close associates. 
     
     Mr. F.B. succeeded in providing an 
     
     environment threatening enough 
     
    
   
   
    
     to drive his room-mate out. (What 
     
    
   
   
    
     Mr. F.B. failed to mention was that 
     
     he also had a new room-mate at 
     
     Christmas and Easter and that by 
     
     late April his room was getting fair- 
     
     ly crowded). 
     
    

    
     if non of these methods have 
     
     proved effective. maybe you have 
     
     over-estimated your room-mate's 
     
     intelligence. Maybe you could get 
     
     away with using the old standard 
     
    
   
   
    
     methods. From a recent survey of 
     
    
   
   
    
     upper year students who 
     
    
   
   
    
     successfully got rid of their room- 
     
    
   
   
    
     mates. 65% felt that the common 
     
    
   
   
    
     methods worked more effectively 
     
    
   
   
    
     and saved time. (Le. those 
     
    
   
   
    
     ' methods such as changing doors. 
     
    
   
   
    
     stealing and setting the room on 
     
     fire). ‘ 
     
    

    
     The impact of the survey's. fln- 
     
     dings could be seen graphically by 
     
     using a supply and demand curve 
     
     for room-mates. At the beginning 
     
     of trash week the demand and 
     
    
   
   
    
     supply of room-mates gives us the 
     
    
   
   
    
     equilibrium price for room-mates; 
     
     that is, every person ‘was paired 
     
    
   
   
    
     with another and all were accom- 
     
     modated. Because of the early ad- 
     
     vent of room-mate terrorization. 
     
     more room-mates were pushed 
     
     out into the housing market against 
     
     their will. Residence killings which 
     
     would rise later in the year (room- 
     
     mates who could not otherwise be 
     
     eliminated) would trigger a slight 
     
     drop in the supply of room-mates 
     
     (cateris paribus). ' r. 
     
    

    
     it should be remembered that 
     
     getting your room-mate to make 
     
     the big move may not be easy. He 
     
     may resist and he might even 
     
     retaliate. Remember how different 
     
     you two are as individuals. If you 
     
     are tell, he is short. If you are a nor- 
     
     mal. clean-living person. he is a 
     
     total boar. if you are quiet. un- 
     
     aggressive and easily irritated, he 
     
     is likely someone like Howie 
     
     Meeker. - 
     
    
   
   
    
     if’the opportunity should ever 
     
     arise you might even sit down and 
     
     explain to him how you are two 
     
     different characters and that even 
     
     though you like him. you think he 
     
     would bemore comfortable living 
     
     somewhere else. where he didn't 
     
     run the risk of being stabbed in his 
     
     sleep. 
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
     .EYtob (a.