Bif
      Naked,
      Muddy
      and
      Rocked
      Out
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      There
      are
      some
      acts
      that
     
    
   
   
    
     
      come
      here,
      play
      their
      set,
      then
     
     
      go
      on
      their
      merry
      way.
      Then
     
     
      there
      are
      those
      other
      acts
      that
     
     
      come
      here
      and
      put
      on
      a
      fucking
     
     
      show.
     
    

    
     
      Having
      said
      that,
      |
      can
     
     
      now
      say
      this:
      Bif
      Naked
      knows
     
     
      how
      to
      rock
      with
      her
      cock
      out.
     
     
      She's
      played
      to
      as
      few
      as
      10
     
     
      people,
      to
      as
      many
      as
      8,500
      in
     
     
      Lunenburg,
      Germany.
      This
     
     
      Vancouver
      based
      rocker
      has
     
     
      seen
      a
      lot
      and
      during
      her
      show
     
     
      she
      let
      us
      in
      on
      some
      life-
     
     
      learned
      advice.
     
    

    
     
      "If
      you're
      a
      girl
      in
      this
     
     
      business,
      you've
      gotta
      have
     
     
      balls
      twice
      as
      big
      as
      a
      guys,”
      Bif
     
     
      told
      the
      audience
      during
      one
      of
     
     
      her
      interludes
      between
      songs.
     
     
      With
      each
      little
      speech
      was
      a
     
     
      message,
      from
      feminist
      state-
     
     
      ments
      ("This
      is
      for
      all
      the
      girls
     
     
      out
      there
      tonight....who
      are
      on
     
     
      their
      period!";
      "I'm
      a
      fucking
     
     
      chick,
      don't
      tell
      me
      you
      haven't
     
     
      noticed.")
      to
      creative
      praise
      of
     
     
      her
      band
      ("I
      want
      everyone
     
     
      to
      stick
      your
      thumbs
      up
     
     
      your
      asses
      to
      keep
      shit
     
     
      inside
      of
      you
      so
      you
      can
     
     
      feel
      the
      awesome
      vibes
      of
     
     
      the
      greatest
      drummer
      in
      the
     
     
      world.";
      "Over
      here
      on
      gui-
     
     
      tar,
      this
      is
      Brit
      Black!
      She
      is
     
     
      Part
      of
      a
      band
      called
      Live
     
     
      on
      Release,
      and
      she's
      18
     
     
      years
      old!"
      ).
     
    

    
     
      She
      also
      plugged
     
     
      her
      merchandise
      a
      lot,
      and
     
     
      with
      good
      reason.
      They
      had
     
     
      Some
      pretty
      nice
      stuff.
     
     
      Everything
      from
      one-shoul-
     
     
      der
      tank
      tops
      to
      thongs,
     
    
   
   
    
     
      undies,
     
     
      and
     
     
      bras.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      The
     
     
      show
     
     
      itself
      was
     
     
      amazing.
     
     
      This
      girl
     
     
      goes
     
     
      absolute-
     
     
      ly
      wild
     
     
      on
      stage.
     
     
      She
     
     
      never
     
     
      stops
     
     
      moving.
     
     
      She
     
     
      struts,
     
     
      she
     
     
      flails,
     
     
      she
     
     
      offers
     
     
      her
      hands
      to
      the
      outstretched
     
     
      arms
      of
      the
      crowd.
      She
      com-
     
     
      pletely
      absorbs
      the
      energy
     
     
      around
      her,
      both
      from
      her
      band
     
     
      and
      the
      audience.
     
    

    
     
      Before
      the
      show,
      while
      in
     
     
      her
      dressing
      room,
      she
      gets
     
     
      pumped
      up
      by
      hooting
      and
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      yelling
      with
      her
      band.
      They
      start
     
     
      the
      party
      themselves,
      then
      bring
     
     
      it
      to
      the
      stage.
     
    

    
     
      Bif
      had
      a
      bit
      of
      a
      new
     
     
      look
      going.
      Her
      hair
      was
      more
     
     
      grunge,
      layered
      and
      hacked
     
     
      with
      her
      bangs
      in
      her
      eyes.
      She
     
     
      wore
      a
      simple
      white
      wife-beater
     
     
      and
      green
      khakis.
      Her
      lips
     
     
      sparkled
     
     
      and
      her
     
     
      black
     
     
      eye
      liner
     
     
      was
     
     
      thick.
     
     
      And
      she
     
     
      smelled
     
     
      nice.
     
     
      Real
     
     
      nice.
     
     
      Though
     
     
      she
     
     
      barely
     
     
      stands
      5
     
     
      feet
      tall,
     
     
      she
      car-
     
     
      ries
      her-
     
    
   
   
    
     
          
     
    
   
   
    
     
      self
      with
      great
      confidence
      and
     
     
      posture,
      and
      seems
      much
      taller.
     
     
      Her
      presence
      and
      focus
      are
      so
     
     
      that
      she
      commands
      the
      atten-
     
     
      tion
      of
      a
      room
      when
      she
      needs
     
     
      to.
     
    

    
     
      Bif
      started
      her
      set
      with
      a
     
     
      few
      lesser
      known
      songs.
      The
     
     
      crowd
      swayed
      and
      bobbed
      to
     
     
      the
      music
      for
      the
      most
      part,
     
     
      waiting
      for
      her
      to
      play
      her
      hits.
     
     
      Eventually
      she
      got
      into
      "Tango
     
     
      Shoes"
      (for
      the
      ladies),
     
     
      "Daddy's
      Getting
      Married”
      (for
     
     
      her
      dad),
      and
      "
      Twitch"
      (for
     
     
      everyone).
      To
      finish
      of
      the
      night,
     
     
      she
      returned
      for
      a
      3
      song
     
     
      encore,
      starting
      with
      "Enter
     
     
      Sandman"
      by
      Metallica.
      she
     
     
      then
      urged
      the
      Mudmen,
      who
     
     
      were
      the
      opening
      act,
      to
      accom-
     
     
      pany
      her
      onstage
      to
      play
     
     
      Twisted
      Sister's
      "We're
      not
     
     
      Gonna
      Take
      It."
     
    

    
     
      _
      Bif
      Naked
      and
      her
      crew
     
     
      are
      currently
      on
      a
      tour
      through-
     
     
      out
      the
      Atlantic
      region.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      -:page
      [5]
      September
      29
      2003:.