they
      need
      to
      be
      fixed.
      It’s
      my
      hips
      too.
      They
      are
      supposed
     
     
      work
      together
      with
      my
      legs
      like
      a
      team
      but
      mine
      are
      fighting
     
     
      with
      each
      other.
      Each
      wants
      to
      go
      their
      own
      way.
     
    

    
     
      I
      don’t
      remember
      the
      operations.
      Except
      for
      one
      time.
     
     
      They
      always
      have
      to
      put
      me
      to
      sleep
      first.
      They
      put
      on
      the
     
     
      mask
      that
      always
      smells
      like
      oranges.
      Sometimes
      I
      have
     
     
      orange
      dreams.
      But
      this
      time
      was
      different.
      This
      time
      I
      had
      a
     
     
      choice.
      I
      could
      use
      the
      mask
      or
      I
      could
      get
      a
      needle
      instead.
      I
     
     
      asked
      if
      the
      needle
      would
      smell
      like
      oranges
      and
      they
      said
      it
     
     
      wouldn’t
      smell
      like
      anything.
      I
      tried
      it
      though.
      I
      went
      with
      the
     
     
      oranges
      mask
      every
      time
      after
      that.
     
    

    
     
      That
      TV-show
      with
      the
      lady
      who
      is
      always
      jumping
      is
     
     
      on
      in
      my
      room
      again.
      When
      she
      jumps
      there
      is
      a
      sound
      like
     
     
      this.
      I
      don’t
      like
      it.
      I
      want
      to
      watch
      Strawberry
      Shortcake,
     
     
      with
      the
      Purple
      bad
      guy,
      all
      wearing
      their
      big
      hats.
      They
      say
     
     
      that
      I
      will
      be
      like
      the
      lady
      in
      the
      show
      they
      always
      put
      on,
     
     
      always
      running
      and
      jumping.
      When
      I
      am
      fixed
      I
      will
      be
      better
     
     
      than
      before.
      I
      will
      be
      a
      good
      runner
      and
      jumper.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Iam
      the
      pinecones
     
     
      _
      There
      are
      lots
      of
      metal
      things
      here.
      Everything
      is
     
     
      shiny
      silver.
      My
      brother
      is
      interested
      in
      the
      metal
      things.
      He
     
     
      is
      always
      tracing
      them
      with
      his
      finger,
      and
      following
      where
     
     
      they
      go,
      like
      those
      puzzles
      in
      my
      workbooks
      where
      the
      fish-
     
     
      erman
      has
      three
      poles
      leading
      to
      three
      different
      color
      fish
      and
     
     
      the
      lines
      are
      all
      tangled.
     
     
      I
      have
      many
      different
      ways
      to
      walk.
      I
      can
      use
      a
      walk-
     
     
      er
      or
      a
      wheelchair
      or
      crutches
      or
      —-
      I
      remember
      when
      I
      was
     
     
      really
      little
      my
      Dad
      used
      to
      carry
      me
      way
      up
      high
      on
      his
     
    
   
   
    
     
      shoulders.
      Now
      he
      can’t
      do
      that
      because
      of
      the
      casts.
     
    

    
     
      I
      am
      weighed
      down
      with
      the
      weights.
      They
      pull
      me
     
     
      slowly
      to
      the
      end
      of
      the
      bed.
      They
      do
      it
      in
      a
      secret
      way
      so
      that
     
     
      I
      never
      notice
      until
      Mom
      or
      Dad
      or
      one
      of
      the
      nurses
      is
     
     
      pulling
      me
      up
      to
      the
      top
      of
      the
      bed
      again.
      I
      am
      like
      Grampy’s
     
     
      cuckoo
      clock.
      The
      metal
      pinecones
      move
      down
      to
      the
      floor
     
     
      during
      the
      day
      and
      each
      night
      after
      supper
      Grampy
      pulls
      on
     
     
      the
      chain
      that
      makes
      them
      move
      back
      up
      to
      the
      top.
      I
      am
      like
     
     
      the
      pinecones.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      At
      first
      I
      was
      There
      and
      now
      I
      am
      Here.
      Who
      knows
      where
      I
     
     
      will
      be
      next?
     
    

    
     
      I
      don’t
      know
      how
      long
      I
      will
      be
      here
      in
      the
      hospital.
     
     
      Nobody
      tells
      me
      how
      long
      this
      will
      go
      on
      for.
      It
      has
      been
      a
     
     
      long
      time
      already.
      Two
      hospital
      Christmases.
      Mom
      always
     
     
      says
      it
      will
      be
      ok
      but
      how
      does
      she
      know?
      She
      never
      spent
     
     
      Christmas
      in
      the
      hospital
      before.
      I
      am
      worried
      that
      Santa
     
     
      wouldn’t
      be
      able
      to
      find
      me
      here.
      He
      is
      used
      to
      me
      being
      at
     
     
      home
      with
      my
      family
      and
      bringing
      everything
      all
      at
      once
      for
     
     
      us.
      And
      there
      are
      so
      many
      kids
      here
      that
      some
      other
      girl
      might
     
     
      get
      my
      stuff
      by
      accident.
      Like
      mean
      Jessica.
      Jessica
      won’t
      let
     
     
      me
      use
      the
      green
      crayon
      because
      she
      knows
      that
      it’s
      my
     
     
      favorite.
      I
      have
      to
      color
      my
      grass
      brown
      and
      my
      trees
      blue.
     
    

    
     
      I
      think
      about
      the
      places
      I
      will
      run
      to
      and
      the
      things
      that
     
     
      I
      will
      jump.
      I
      want
      to
      get
      a
      new
      bike
      too
      because
      with
      new
     
     
      legs
      you
      need
      a
      new
      bike.
      I
      will
      probably
      be
      an
      even
      better
     
     
      biker
      than
      before
      but
      maybe
      not,
      because
      you
      never
      see
      that
     
     
      lady
      on
      the
      show
      riding
      on
      a
      bike.