SPECIAL 100 PERCENT BIO-DEGRADEABLE PAGE VIEW TOP THE VIEW FROM THE TOP STAFF are shown here in the annual staff photo. ”’we have nothing to be ashamed of.” Horny the Engineer, This page is humour for the sake of humour. neccessarily be opinions at all. “It’s been a good year.” says Well, hi kiddies!. It’s been a great year so far. Any fools who take this page seriously Horny the FRIENDS WANTED Are you a young, attractive male looking for companionship? There are 60 young, intelligent, witty, handsome. interesting, sexy young Marianettes who want to be your closest friends. We are all good buddies but we've been together too much in every way over the year and are looking for fresh excitement. Send a nude photo and re- sume to “Biffy”, Marian Hall, Charlottetown. Or apply in person. Just ask for “The Guys”. Aids. carriers need not apply. Engineer Has the Last Laugh How about that Bio Page a few weeks back? I bet those clever bios were working on it all year. Quite an achievement, if you ask any Bio. The Bios are really very nice people, once you get to know them. Why the S.U. president this year was a Bio and the S.U. president next year will be one too. Bios are so cute. Bios are so smart and nice. Bios are just the coolest people on the whole... RRRGGHH!! I CAN’T STAND IT ANYMORE!!!! I’m sorry, censor board! I just can’t do it! I can’t! I'VE GOT TO INSULT THEM! And now (hee hee hee) I shall. I was walking down the street and I met a Bio carry- ing a pig. "How much did you pay for that?” I asked. The pig replied, ”*seventy-five cents.” Why, I bet those AAAR- An interesting biological note: Bio mothers are strong and broad shouldered from raising Dumbells. There éven was once a Bio who lost his job as an elevator ene because he couldn’t learn the route. Hah Ha Ha Haaar! I’m not finished yet, Kiddies, I... ** STOP!! £* What? ** YOU CAN’T SAY THAT, HORNY. ** Say what? ** KIDDIES. YOU CAN’T SAY KIDDIES. YOU JUST MIGHT POSSIBLY OFFEND THE GOAT FARM- ERS. ** What’s going on here? Who are you? ** YOU’VE BEEN OFFENDING TOO MANY PEO- PLE LATELY, HORNY. I AM THE HOLY CENSOR AND I SHALL MAKE YOUR MATERIAL ACCEPT- ABLE ONCE MORE. ** Sounds O.K. to me. I don’t need any more crap from mindless protestors. I’ll go along with it. O.K. Let’s talk about the last Bio Pub... YOU MIGHT OFFEND THE FU- NERAL HOMES! ** Hey! Get off my back, already. Me DONT The opinions expressed here are not neccessarily the opinions of The Gem or the Engineering Society and may not and offend themselves should start trying to develop a sense of humour. $ Super Challenge Scavenger Hunt. Here’s a real challenge for all you keeners out there who think you’re real hot. If you can find one of the below, rate yourself a smart dude. If you can find two, you are | a slick dude. If you can find three, you are a liar. Here’s | the official list for the hunt: A Bio with brains A Marianette with personality A parking space at 9:45 A.M. A femenist who likes engineering students Someone who’s. been to a Bio Pub A challenging job with the Department of Highways An interesting article in The Gem that has nothing to do with sex, drugs, or violence President Elliot’s house after his challenge to the En- | gineers ** CAN’T SAY THAT, HORNY. IT HAS QUES- TIONABLE CONNOTATIONS. ** Oh, come on! ** QUESTIONABLE CONNOTATIONS AGAIN, HORNY! ** You’re reading too much into what I’m saying! ** WATCH IT! YOU’LL OFFEND ILLITERATE PEOPLE! ** : ; Now, listen here! I’m trying to raise the educational level of this paper! ** THE EDUCATION FACULTY WON’T LIKE THAT. BETTER NOT SAY IT! ** That’s a load of horse-crap! ** AAH! NOW YOU’RE OFFENDING SAGA FOODS! ** O.K., you lowdown piece of slime... ** YOU CAN’T SAY THAT EITHER! YOU ARE INSULTING THE BIOS! ** Worse things could happen. ** SORRY. YOU’LL OFFEND PESIMISTS ALL OVER ‘THE WORLD IF YOU SAY THAT! ** Please, Censor. You’re taking things to seriously. I just want to . entertain people; to make them laugh, and to bring light and hope to the world. I have a dream! A dream of peace and understanding between all nations of the... ** NOW YOU ARE INSULTING MY INTELLI- GENCE!! YOU REALLY THINK I'LL FALL FOR THAT CRAP? YOU THILLY GUY, YOU!...UH..OOPS! ** Ah-Ha!! You gave yourself away!! You’re no Holy Censor! You’re a Marianette who’s trying to sabotage me! ** OH, DWAT! NOW ILL JUST HAVE TO PRANCE HOME AND TELL THE GUYS I FAILED. HOW TWAGIC! SNIFFLE. I BET DEY WON’T WIKE ME ANYMORE. ** ; Yes! Hah ha harr! Run, you piece of slime and know now and for evermore that I, Horny the Engineer, always have the last laugh! HAH hah hah hah! Thursday, April 9th 1987=== ]