(CUP)
      God
      bless
      those
      fine
      folks
      at
     
     
      the
      Canadian
      Radio-Television
      and
      Tel-
     
     
      ecommunications
      Commission.
      Their
      re-
     
     
      cent
      decision
      to
      make
      MuchMusic
      take
      off
     
     
      Ren
      and
      Stimpy
      will
      make
      our
      fine
      nation
     
     
      safe
      for
      democracy
      once
      more.
      Lord
      knows
     
     
      that
      we
      wouldn’t
      want
      our
      children
      telling
     
     
      “magic
      nose
      goblin”
      jokes
      at
      school.
      The
     
     
      last
      place
      you'd
      find
      that
      type
      of
      humour
      is
     
     
      a
      school
      yard
      and
      it
      is
      certainly
      not
      ex-
     
     
      pected
      from
      the
      average
      eight
      year-old-
     
     
      child.
     
    

    
     
      After
      a
      complaint
      was
      filed
      to
      the
     
     
      CRTC
      (notice
      how
      I
      said
      “a”
      and
      not
     
     
      “many”),
      MuchMusic
      was
      asked
      to
      re-
     
     
      move
      Ren
      and
      Stimpy
      from
      its
      lineup.
      The
     
     
      reason
      given
      was
      that
      the
      show
      didn’t
      fit
     
     
      into
      their
      programming
      license.
      Thank
     
     
      GOD!
      If
      MuchMusic
      was
      allowed
      to
      run
     
     
      Ren
      and
      Stimpy,
      our
      country
      would
      be
     
     
      unsafe
      for
      our
      children
      to
      grow
      up
      in
      and
     
     
      would
      simply
      self-destruct.
     
    

    
     
      ‘This
      decision
      has
      proven
      to
      me
      some-
     
     
      thing
      that
      I
      have
      felt
      for
      a
      few
      years:
      the
     
     
      CRTC
      is
      filled
      with
      small-minded
      bureau-
     
     
      crats.
      This
      is
      not
      the
      commission’s
      first
      act
     
    
   
   
    
     
      of
      stupidity.
      A
      few
      years
      ago,
      the
      station’
     
    
   
   
    
     
      that
      was
      CKIS
      FM
      was
      caught
      playing
     
     
      “hard”
      rock
      music
      when
      they
      were
      only
     
     
      licensed
      to
      play
      “soft”
      rock.
      When
      the
     
     
      station
      asked
      to
      change
      licenses,
      the
      CRTC
     
     
      turned
      them
      down
      because
      they
      were
      play-
     
     
      ing
      too
      much
      “hard”
      rock.
      A
      song
      they
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      CRTC
      protects
     
     
      your
      kids
      and
      kills
     
     
      -Ren
      &
      Stimpy
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      singled
      out
      as
      “hard”
      rock
      was
      the
      Beatles’
      “Love
     
     
      Me
      Do.”
      Folks,
      this
      is
      an
      example
      of
      our
      tax
      dollars
     
     
      at
      work.
     
    

    
     
      Asecondexample
      happened
      about
      four
      years
     
     
      agoin
      Toronto
      when
      license
      applications
      for
      anew
     
     
      FM
      station
      were
      being
      accepted.
      Two
      groups
     
     
      applied,
      one
      for
      a
      country
      station
      and
      one
      for
      an
     
     
      inner-city,
      urban
      music
      station.
      They
      gave
      it
      to
      the
     
     
      country
      station
      even
      though
      the
      city’s
      last
      country
     
     
      station
      changed
      formats
      because
      of
      low
      ratings
     
     
      and
      inner
      city,
      as
      far
      as
      Radio
      Canada
      is
      concerned,
     
     
      is
      ignorant
      while
      it
      dominates
      the
      nation’s
      sales
     
     
      charts.
      Before
      I
      get
      hate
      mail
      from
      country
      music
     
     
      fans,
      you
      have
      to
      remember
      this
      is
      before
      Garth
     
     
      Brooks
      happened
      and
      country
      music’s
      popularity
     
     
      was
      renewed.
      Hip-hop,
      dance
      and
      other
      forms
      of
     
     
      inner-city,
      urban
      music
      still
      dominate
      the
      music
     
     
      charts
      and
      are
      still
      being,
      for
      the
      most
      part,
      ig-
     
     
      nored.
     
    

    
     
      What
      the
      CRTC
      doesn’t
      realize
      is
      that
      run-
     
     
      ning
      a
      television
      or
      radio
      station
      is
      like
      running
      a
     
     
      business.
      Ren
      and
      Stimpy
      ran
      on
      MuchMusic
     
     
      because
      it
      was
      popular,
      and
      when
      a
      show
      is
      popu-
     
     
      lar,
      it
      attracts
      advertisers
      which,
      in
      turn,
      creates
     
     
      revenue.
      CKIS
      FM
      was
      a
      popular
      station
      when
      it
     
     
      played
      rock
      that
      attracted
      advertisers,
      creating
     
     
      revenue.
      The
      group
      that
      wanted
      to
      start
      an
      inner-
     
     
      city,
      urban
      music
      station
      knew
      there
      was
      a
      market
     
     
      for
      it
      and
      it
      could
      have
      been
      a
      successful
      business
     
     
      venture.
      To
      the
      CRTC,
      Ihave
      to
      say
      this:
      “It’s
      called
     
     
      capitalism.
      Look
      into
      it.”
      And
      that’s
      more
      impor-
     
     
      tant
      than
      any
      stupid
      license.
     
    

    
     
      Ian
      Ferguson
      of
      the
      Manitoban