by Stewart Suite and George Loney I Chevron staff smog @ME DEPARTMENT HEAD Department heads are very busy ADMINISTRATIVE ' ASSISTANT VICEPRESIDENT’S -' SECRETARY The vicepresidents’ secretaries have been around a long time-— In fact in most cases they've out- lived their bosses—so you‘ll have to wait here two weeks in homage. (Brenda Stanton is the exception—— you'll still wait two weeks, but you wouldn‘t mind the homage) VICEPRESIDE NTS These men. sometimes many. men. They arrive late, spend their morning in a committee meeting, take two hours for lunch, spend their afternoon in a committee meeting and leave promptly at 4:55 after having spent the last 25 minutes of their working day on the telephone to someone about yesterday’s committee meeting, the morning committee meeting or tomorrow’s committee meeting. They will, of course. be able to take your problem to a committee. Wait three weeks for the right committee to meet. These men are very important in the structure because they usual- ly serve as secretaries to the larger committees. If you don‘t know why a committee secre- tary is important, you’ve never been to a t imittee meeting and then read the minutes afterwards. When they aren‘t taking minutes, they are preparing reports on committees or placing the files (mfthe vicepresident’s desk in neat bundles. Wait here four weeks because ’ sometimes few. depending how many resignations recently took effect,-are the administration‘s chief apologists. They are the ones who chair the study and advisory committees. they are the ones who bring together all the many different sectors into one small tight bundle. As they will clearly . tell you though. they never. never make a decision. You will be directed to either a committee or the president, after waiting three weeks go on. DEPARTMENT SECRETARY Ghere are two types of depart- ment secretaries. The first really wants to help the students and will try hard to. Unfortunately there is little she can do. The sec- ond thinks the world revolves a- round her. 1 Flip a coin—heads you have the first kind and move on right away; tails you have the second kind and spend three weeks at this stage. ADVISORY COMMITTEE The president can make deci- sions, but he would rather not let _ too many people know, certainly not students. So after explaining to you that the Board of, Gover- nors makes all the decisions, and making certain you’ve gone through all the proper stages so far. he will assure you your prob— lem will be taken to the board. Move on after three weeks dis- cussions. administrative assistants are always so very. very busy. I I 1 l T [—A _‘J THE PRESIDENT 1| THE PRESIDENT’S SECRETARY The president‘s secretary is moth~ i, ‘ er-of—the-year and business ty— coon all rolled up into one. Being motherly, she thinks students should be kept in their place——the crib. Wait one week to get an appoint- ment, and then two more for it. 1 ‘25" J J l— Everybody and every problem has an advisory committee. Here the problem is fully discussed and F. 4 THE PRESIDEI IT’S COUNCIL ' _|"'| studies of how the University of Northern California and Tanzania Tech are solving the problem are distributed. At least two meetings are devoted to every problem before (a) The president‘s council co-ordin~ ates all the committees every- where. Every one of its members has at least one advisory com- mittee. These men bring prob- lems to the council where new' solutions are dreamed up or the some kind of advice is passed up — to whomever the committee is advising: (b) the problem being discussed is forgotten in side is- sues; or (c) a subcommittee. which will never meet because everyone is too busy, is formed to investigate the problem in depth. matter referred to a special sub- committee. Finally, however, a decision will be held'up pending a decision from committee as to whether or not financing is possible. So wait two weeks and then go the budgets directly to the budgets commit- Wait here four weeks. . tee. J _ _1__. In demic. it will of course be sent A to the senate for consideration. Eventually—the board meets every three months or so—a decision will be approved. pro- vided~some one responsible from the administration—“willfflrecpm- mendadecision. " _ Proceed to finish' after waiting one month.. ' THE BUDGETS L- COMMITTEE l '— ' Every decision costs money. J n——_ money comes from the budgets F- committee. However. the budgets THE BOARD OF committee must know priorities ' for the entire university, so wait Y 3:1)VEENORShed th here two weeks and then go im- ,0“ pr em as I?“ j e media?le t3 the Prgsidfit'g' $2222? 1323113335333 “5225 councx or a ec1s10n on ow l ' ~ ' a priority your problem is. g and intelligent men will seriously ' ' consider your proposal (we know they are noble. wise and intelli- a ' gent because most of them are L I wealthyh ’ J If your problem is novel. a com- ! mittee or subcommittee may be ‘ formed to deal with it. If it is aca— % SENATE Everybody gets together in the senate, the university‘s academic decision-making body. Almost all final decisions may be made here: except if they require financing (if so you must go to the board of governors) So after it has been determined that there is money to hire or promote faculty, here is where the job will be done. Except that the department head, faculty coun- cils, department committee. other professors, etc., will be part of the decision along the way, it is still unclear exactly how. If your problem will cost money or mean a restructuring of the university, that of course must go elsewhere. But rest assured you’ve found the home of the decisions the fac- ulty cares about—salary deci- sions. Wait three weeks and then move on. - £4 r Waflzallz’ons 0 you M34 e aafélld Saan fill