Page
      8
      March
      16,
      2009
      OPINION
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
        
     
    
   
   
    
     
      C
     
     
      “global
      warming”
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      The
      Editor:
     
    

    
     
      When
      I
      write
      to
      newspapers
      about
      the
     
     
      proof
      that
      the
      world
      has
      cooled
      more
     
    

    
     
      -
      in
      the
      last
      six
      years
      than
      it
      warmed
     
    

    
     
      in
      the
      last
      40
      years
      I
      get
      the
      most
     
     
      humorous
      responses,
      like
      the
      follow-
     
     
      ing
      quote:
     
    

    
     
      “What
      Don,
      in
      his
      ignorance
      doesn’t
     
     
      understand
      is
      that
      global
      cooling
      is
     
     
      actually
      a
      result
      of
      global
      warming!”
     
     
      end
      of
      quote.
     
    

    
     
      Cool
      is
      hot?
      I
      want
      these
      believers
      to
     
     
      put
      their
      theory
      to
      the
      test
      by
      imple-
     
     
      menting
      it.
     
    

    
     
      If
      “cold
      is
      hot”
      then:
     
    

    
     
      A)
      the
      next
      time
      the
      traffic
      light
      turns
     
     
      green
      wait
      until
      the
      car
      behind
      you
     
     
      honks
      get
      out
      and
      tell
      him
      that
      the
     
     
      light
      is
      “green.
      when
      it
      is
      red!”
     
    

    
     
      B)
      Overdraw
      your
      bank
      account
      and
     
     
      ignore
      it
      -
      and
      when
      you
      get
      a
      “final
     
     
      reminder”
      storm
      into
      the
      bank
      office
     
     
      and
      tell
      the
      manager
      “what
      you
      in
     
     
      your
      ignorance
      don’t
      understand
      is
     
     
      that
      the
      account
      is
      in
      the
      red
      because
     
     
      it
      is
      in
      the
      black.”
     
    

    
     
      C)
      Try
      running
      for
      politics
      and
     
     
      tell
      the
      voters
      that
      when
      you
      “take”
     
     
      money
      in
      taxes,
      you
      are
      actually
      giv-
     
     
      ing
      back!
      (this
      has
      been
      tried
      before)
     
    

    
     
      D)
      How
      about
      the
      ultimate
      test
      of
     
     
      your
      theory
      that
      “cold
      is
      hot”
      Tell
     
     
      your
      wife
      “what
      you
      in
      your
      igno-
     
     
      rance
      don’t
      understand
      is
      that
      being
     
     
      unfaithful
      is
      all
      a
      part
      of
      loving
      you
     
    

    
     
      You
      may
      actually
      experience
      that
     
     
      simultaneously
      “cold
      and
      boiling”
     
     
      can
      actually
      happen.
      Lots
      of
      luck
      —
     
     
      you’re
      going
      to
      need
      it.
      If
      you
      run
      into
     
     
      trouble,
      dial
      “1-800
      LONELY.”
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      +92
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Don
      Warkentin
     
     
      Mission,
      B.C.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      School
      of
      Graduate
      Studies
     
    
   
   
    
     
      www.
      mun.ca/become