STUDENT
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      vote,
      stupid.
     
    
   
   
    
     
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      POLLS
     
    
   
   
    
     
      March
      20,
      21
     
    
   
   
    
     
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      March
      22,
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      Editorial
      14:
      The
      Auto-
     
     
      Pilot
      ice
      Age
      (or
      How
     
     
      Student
      Politics
      is
      like
     
     
      eating
      a
      banana)
     
    

    
     
      When
      you
      begin
      paying
     
     
      attention
      the
      most
      normal
      of
     
    
   
   
    
     
      occurrences
      can
      become
     
     
      truly
      beautiful,
      and
      some
     
    
   
   
    
     
      things
      you
     
     
      never
      pay
     
     
      attention
      to.
      |
     
     
      have
      driven,
     
     
      as
      have
      you,
     
     
      countless
     
    
   
   
    
     
      places,
      only
      to
     
    
   
   
    
     
      realize,
      upon
      arrival
      that
      |
     
     
      have
      no
      memory
      of
      the
     
     
      journey.
      Auto-pilot,
      in
      cars,
     
    
   
   
    
     
      relationships,
      school
      and
      life,
     
     
      is
      an
      important,
      even
      neces-
     
     
      sary
      thing
      for
      people
      to
      count
     
     
      on.
      The
      ability
      to
      cruise
     
     
      through
      days
      unaffected
      by
     
     
      your
      surroundings
      helps
      you
     
     
      though
      the
      truly
      painful,
      and
     
     
      the
      truly
      mundane.
      Some-
     
     
      times,
      though,
      when
      you
      have
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
         
     
    
   
   
    
     
      been
      stuck
      in
      this
     
     
      plowing
      through
      the
     
     
      motions,
      you
      need
     
     
      something
      to
      wake
      you
     
     
      up,
      and
      push
      you
      back
     
     
      into
      the
      race.
      Forme
      it
     
     
      was
      two
      hand
      fulls
      of
     
     
      ice.
      I’m
      interested
      in
      fruit
     
     
      shakes
      these
      days,
      and
     
    
   
   
    
     
      |
      have
      bought
      a
      blender.
      |
     
     
      began
      noticing
      the
      casual
     
     
      elegance
      of
      many
      of
      the
     
     
      fruits
      |
      had
      been
      working
     
     
      with
      (the
      way
      a
      Kiwi-
     
     
      wrapped
      in
      one
      of
      the
      most
     
     
      hideous
      shells-leaps
      in
     
     
      green
      and
      black
      dots
      off
      a
     
     
      spoon
      is
      absolute
      poetry).
     
     
      But
      it
      was
      not
      until
      |
      begun
     
     
      to
      feel
      and
      notice
      the
      ice
     
     
      that
      |
      saw
      the
      power
      of
     
     
      such
      beauty
      to
      arrest
      me
      of
     
     
      all
      whimsy
      and
      concern.
     
     
      Can't
      explain
      it
      much,
      but
      it
     
     
      was,
      and
      is,
      a
      truly
      memo-
     
     
      rable
      experience.
     
    

    
     
      |
      am
      choking
      down
      two
      a
     
     
      day,
      as
      much
      for
      the
     
     
      aesthetic
      as
      for
      the
      taste.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Speaking
      of
      choking
      down,
     
     
      |
      am
      interested
      to
      know
     
     
      how
      any
      human
      being
      can
     
     
      swallow
      a
      banana
     
     
      (unblended
      that
      is).
      It
      has
     
     
      the
      consistency
      of
      fecal
     
     
      matter
      (by
      sight
      anyway)
     
     
      and
      with
      all
      apologies
      to
     
     
      you
      banana
      lovers
      the
     
     
      thought
      of
      actually
      eating
     
     
      one
      gives
      me
      a
      Patti
      and
     
     
      Selma-induced
      shudder.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Speaking
      of
      eating
      shit
      |
     
    

    
     
      think
      that
      B.J.
      McCarville
      >
     
     
      will
      win
      the
      race
      for
      presi-
     
    

    
     
      dent,
      |
      also
      think
      that
     
    

    
     
      Megan
      Miller
      will
      win
      for
     
     
      valedictorian,
      Gordon
     
    

    
     
      Henley
      will
      win
      for
      finance,
     
    

    
     
      and
      Kirstin
      Stavert
      will
      win
     
    

    
     
      for
      communications,
      and
      |
     
    

    
     
      am
      absolutely
      sure
      that
      Lori
     
     
      Doiron
      will
      win
      for
      activities.
     
    

    
     
      These
      are
      not
      endorse-
     
    

    
     
      ments
      by
      the
      way,
      just
     
     
      predictions,
      not
      on
      behalf
      of
     
    

    
     
      the
      newspaper
      either,
      but
     
    

    
     
      myself.
      |
      would
      like
      to
     
    

    
     
      have
      told
      the
      stories
      of
      the
     
     
      weird
      and
      strange
      offers
      tJ
     
     
      made
      of/to
      me
      this
      past
     
     
      week
      in
      the
      name
      of
      4
     
     
      realpolitik,
      but
      |
      will
      not.
      It
     
     
      would
      just
      make
      you
     
     
      disinterested,
      maybe
      make
     
     
      you
      switch
      back
      to
      auto-
     
     
      pilot,
      when
      what
      you
      should
     
     
      be
      doing
      is
      grabbing
      your-
     
     
      self
      some
      ice.
     
    

    
     
      Nice
      huh?
     
    

    
     
      ‘Yeah,
      real
      nice
      y’all.’
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Uae
      page
      3.