Mass
      Destroyation?...p.
      11
     
    
   
   
    
     
      sree
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Pe:
     
    
   
   
    
     
         
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      “Yewspapers
      &
      Magazines
     
    
   
   
    
     
      we
      ted
      tn
     
    
   
   
    
     
      a
      of
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      5
      ee,
      en
      2
      Fant
      y
      '
     
     
      lhl
      Cad
      wr
      ke
      wo
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Bathroom
      Survey...
      p.13
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ~
      VOLUME
      35
      Issue
      11
     
    
   
   
    
     
      UPEI
      STUDENT
      NEWSPAPER
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Fespruary
      1,
      2005
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Whassa
      Matta
      You?
      -
      Home
      Grown
     
     
      Italian
      Cooking
      Alive
      on
      Campus
     
    
   
   
    
     
         
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Jamie
      McGuigan
     
     
      Reporter
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Italians,
      or
      people
      pretending
      to
     
     
      be
      Italian,
      have
      brought
      us
      many
     
     
      treasures
      in
      life...
      The
      Godfather
     
     
      Trilogy,
      Super
      Mario
      Brothers
      3,
      and
     
     
      of
      course
      fine
      cooking.
      The
      latter
     
     
      example
      is
      showcased
      with
      the
      addition
     
     
      of
      two
      new
      genuine
      Italian
      restaurants
     
     
      on
      campus,
      an
      East
      Side
      Mario’s
     
     
      Express
      and
      Domino’s
      Pizza.
      So
      look
     
     
      out
      Chartwell’s,
      you’re
      about
      to
      be
     
     
      whacked.
     
    

    
     
      Don’t
      cancel
      that
      daily
      trip
      to
     
     
      the
      food
      bank
      yet
      though.
      Thinking
      of
     
     
      stopping
      by
      for
      unlimited
      bread
      and
     
     
      appetizers
      at
      East
      Side’s,
      well
     
     
      fuhgetaboudit.
      This
      one
      stop
      spot
      in
     
     
      MacLaughlin
      arena
      doesn’t
      even
      offer
     
     
      the
      half-price
      appetizers,
      nor
      the
      full-
     
     
      price
      beers
      that
      made
      the
      University
     
     
      Avenue
      location
      such
      a
      popular
      spot
      for
     
     
      students.
      This
      location
      specializes
      in
     
     
      wraps,
      fries,
      burgers,
      and
      Al
      Pacino’s
     
     
      favourite
      drink,
      Chocolate
      milk.
      It’s
     
     
      more
      like
      an
      upscale
      hockey
      rink
     
     
      -
      canteen,
      or
      so
      says
      three-time
      hotdog-
     
     
      eating
      contest
      champion
      Andrew
     
     
      MacSwain.
      Pains
     
    

    
     
      The
      Domino’s
      Pizza
      is
     
     
      conveniently
      located
      inside
      the
      Student
     
     
      Centre,
      and
      combines
      high
      prices
      with
     
     
      nostalgia.
      Domino’s
      reminds
      me
      of
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
       
     
    
   
   
    
     
      elementary
      school
      pizza
      days,
      they
     
     
      should
      really
      be
      selling
      those
      little
      juice
     
     
      boxes
      too,
      a
      correspondent
      university
     
     
      restaurant
      connoisseur
      remarked.
      Well
     
     
      if
      they
      did,
      they
      would
      probably
      be
      $5
     
     
      per
      juice
      box.
      Domino’s
      is
      selling
      their
     
     
      pizza
      for
      the
      low,
      low
      price
      of
      $3.50
      a
     
     
      slice.
      Seems
      reasonable
      when
      you
     
     
      contemplate
      the
      fact
      that
      a
      large
      pizza
     
     
      sells
      to
      students
      for
      $9.99.
     
    

    
     
      There
      might
      be
      even
      more
      food
     
     
      vendors
      coming
      to
      campus.
      Tim
     
     
      Horton’s
      had
      previously
      been
      offered
      a
     
     
      kiosk,
      but
      turned
      it
      down.
      Whether
     
     
      other
      stores
      will
      be
      anything
      from
      a
      Cy’s
     
     
      to
      an
      Afternoon
      Delight
      is
      unknown
      at
     
    
   
   
    
     
      the
      time.
      Also
      there
      is
      a
      proposition
      to
     
     
      have
      an
      organic
      food
      day,
      for
      all
      you
     
     
      bleeding
      heart
      liberal
      vegetarians.
      A
     
     
      menu
      made
      of
      soy
      and
      other
      meat
     
     
      alternatives
      will
      be
      provided.
      I
      hope
     
     
      you're
      all
      happy
      with
      yourselves.
     
     
      Joke
      of
      the
      Week
     
     
      Doctor:
      I
      have
      some
      bad
      news
      and
     
     
      some
      worse
      news.
     
     
      Patient:
      Give
      me
      the
      bad
      news
      first.
     
     
      Doctor:
      The
      lab
      called.
      You
      have
      24
     
     
      hours
      to
      live.
     
     
      Patient:
      24
      HOURS?!?
      What
      could
     
     
      possibly
      be
      worse
      than
      that?
     
     
      Doctor:
      Uh,
      I
      couldn’t
      get
      a
      hold
      of
     
     
      you
      yesterday.
     
     
      Submit
      your
      joke:
      upeicadre@gmail.com