By Ed Orlowski 5 everyone knows, (that is, everyone that’s in the know) Kleaner ‘wears a Genuine, Russian a‘sbestbs fur flinger with ouiji board slapperletts. . hangs in the Keaners Losit in the Cass Chemestry Building re it. always has until an X-Engineer, now a mistry Senior called “Dave”, took the notion ‘in the name Chemistry of course’, to give the» Kleaner’s Genuine sian asbestos fur flinger cap with ouiji board slapperletts, ink of water. . hat was of course all right, the Kleaner himself does this asionally, but this guy Dave Mac., the X-Engineer, now hemistry Major, gave the Genuine Russian asbestos fur ger cap with ouiji board slapperletts a bath in used water. ow that’s a non-no for when the hat hit the bucket, it antly became dirticated, and sank under the attack .of the . grubbies in themuggy bubbly water of the sluggy bucket, ch .the’ Kleaner uses for the floor on the main floor of the utiful and Exotic Cass. Chemistry Building. ig Dave’, was Very apologetic, when he brought the aming Genuine Russian asbestos fur flinger cap with the ji board slapperletts to the Kleaner. he Kleaner shrieked with horror, at the drowned house use effect which he saw when he looked at his dear friend I constant winter companion. ' ‘Is he alive”, waked the Kleaner, “Is he still alive???” ave hung his head at the 45 degree angle traditional stance which denotes sincere sympathy in a Chemistry Senior. “1 don’t know Kleaner, I don’t know, I can’t tell!, how do you tell?” “Well, Davie Baby,” the Kleaner said, “How long was he under the mirkey muggy bubbly dirty grubbies ...?” “I don’t know Kleaner, I lost all track of time, I put the back of my hand on my check, it felt hot, so I ran into the washroom and looked in the mirror, I knew that I was excited .. my checks were really a flushey red colour, boy was I excited so I ran back to the klosit quickly took a clean cloth and wiped out as much of the mirkey muggie bubbly, dirty grubbies as I could, but I don’t know, I just don’t know???” The Kleaner saw that Davie’s emotions were getting traumatic at this point in time So he thought he’d change the subject matter and ‘he said to poor trembling Dave “Come Over here big guy sit down and relax for a few minutes, you’ve been through a great, ‘hair raising wetting have some ‘I-Iostess Crunchits with cheddar experience cheese, the 32 g size at 40 cents per bag. “You know, Dave, these are made in Canada, they come all the way from 1001 Bishop Street in Cambridge, Ontario N3H-4T7, a place called Hostess Consumers Response Centre, and do you know that they put cornmeal; hydrogenated vegetable oil (contains B.H.A. Propyl Gellate, Citric Acid); Vegetable oil, Cheese, powder seasoning, salt, whey powder; soybeam lecithin; disodium phosphade; lactic acid; and yummy food colour (contains tartrazine) now Davie Baby doesn’t that taste wonderful ...” “Munch, munch ‘slurp,’ munch, munch munch” “Thats a good fellow, here now .. down with a ‘Tab cola’, it has other information in it and on the cap; and is a registered trade mark ofCoca-Cola Ltd. “Just chug it Davie, just chug it ..., yes just chug all the 300 ML Davie old boy and the Coke company will have given you a shot of Tab with Aspartame, at only 1.5 calories per bottle, and no sugar Davie, that means less cavities ehlil. . good-boy “Now don’t worry vor fret Davie-boy see there. Kleaners hat is starting to wiggle by itself, so the Kleaners hat H the is alive and kicking “Thanks to your quck thinking and 1 wash it teachers possess degrees Malawi Lesotho Zimbabwe Botswana Swaziland Opportunities are available for qualified university graduates teaching subject. Tradesmen and Professionals in other fields are also required for the United Volunteer Programme, An information session will be held on Thursday, March 15 at 7:00 pm. room Dalton and 07A. UPEI. If you are unable to attend. information and an application form please write to: Recruitment Coordination Officer WORLD UNIVERSITY SERVICE OF CANADA (GR) PO. Box 3000. Station ‘0' Ottawaomarto KtY 4M8 ina acting, and the Kleaner‘will be able to wear his Genuine Russian asbestos fur flinger cap with ouiji board slapperletts home with him, the trauma has passed, all the brooms and mops in the Kloset were happy again, and “Big guy Davie went home witha big smile on his face”. The. 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