A visitor to an asylum recently saw a
IBB cspcnnitlong the hall astride of a
ldck. Ah, 1” mid he, wishing to be
pleasant, I see you are having a inc
ride on your horse " “This isn’t s horse,
lliswered the lunatic, conteinptuously
“Not a horse-what is it, then‘f" “lt’s a
bobby was the reply if it was a
li rse I could get oil' ’
A long winded visitor once asked Bis-
larcl. how he got rid of visitors who
bored him Why, said the chancellor,
Ilulmg I have an arrangement with
my wife When people stay too long,
the sends a seriant to say that she
needs me” At that moment entered a
servant, saying that the princess would
speak with the chancellor Bismarck
vely made his eucuses, and the bore
A small bov in a. Victoria. Countv school
was asked by his teacher to write what
he knew about the peace in South Africa
Result “The Boers fought against Env
land, and Colonel Hughes went to Africa
and fought them. By and by every one
tho ht it time to sto but the Boers
won] ’t. So Colonel ughes, who had
come hack home, sent word he would go
and fight them again if they would not
make peace, and they d d, providing he
would be their Governor Which is
about as true as many accepted chapters
A committee once called on Wu Tinff
fang to request him to address a society
connected with one of the fashionable
churches of \Vashington Casual inen
tion was made of the fact that the
youthful pastor of the church had re
cently resigned, to enter upon a new
field of labor on the Pacific Coast Why
did he re°i<rn"” asked \lr Wu Because
he had receii ed a call to another church
was the reply ‘ll hat salary did you
pay hiin"’ Fo ir thousand dollais
What is his pieiciit salary "” Eiffht
thousand dnlia.s \n"’ said he d s
ple of Confiic is, ‘ ierv loud call' ’
Six year old lo mm ii is sent bv hi'
eldesti sfslier to tue g occ-i s to buy .i
palm o um suffix Aft” the ro iie
ltlor of tne shgpbliicl sexi u ltne listleplad,
e en°'.i°°e I`om\ y in couiersation
Tommy? said Le I uiideistand there
is a new member of your family 9’ “Yes,
sir,” replied the boy, I\e got a little
brother Well, how do you like that,
hey?" enquired thi- grocer Don t like
it at all,’ said Tommy , “rather have a.
little sister ’ 'Then why dont you
legiange lailrg, 'll.)`/riinpiylx Well, we would
we co ut on t suppose we can
You see, ue have used hini fo_ir days
Dr Henry Van Dyke tells a story of
an old Irishman who was engaged in the
business of chicken raising near Prince»
ton One dai a traveling man expressed
surprise at t e use of so much cornmeal
at feeding time, and suggested that the
meal 'be mixed with sawdust, insisting
tht the hens would not know the dif
mance A few months later the travel
man was again in the eommumt
andhcask ifthcnewdiethadbseyn
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cried andw ttheresulthadbsai “It
rkb bsantiully,” was the reply ‘Sec
old yellow ie!! Well, I tried her
on half and half and she liked it so well
I changed rt to all sawdust, and the last
time sho hatched, three of the dicks
ladwoodcnlogaiidafoiirthwuss
woodpecker.”
, who his in hnsar
i has a boy who is
nloq athrseyeor-old trot-
* tanning lr Bmlmq asked
v___,,,_, of oebook QE?
thi-t¥oL~&
E.-Wi-f~.. ,
ggliéiiiiifiigii
l=§§§§i§?l§§il§;;5
ite»eai
fi ig, glwif g i
   
zrliagjlal g.??¥'~.  ge
nu'
e e i as
:lfeamfifnifaio nf” i,
l. reward for’ Alfonso the Chaste”
Thst’s all very well,” remarked Alfonso,
“but what foundation have you for this
bclieff’ “None, sire The time of le-
gends is past” Further on the 'bisho
mlled the king’s attention to a snial
antique chest uhicli was locked 'lradi
tion says that whoei cr opens this chest
will die suddenly The Line, with the
abruptness of youth exclaims, \\ ell' I
:lon’t mind opcninf' it And the bishop,
imitating the independent spirit of the
sos ereign, answered \eithei° do I, your
inajestv, and if I have failed to do so
bcfo e it is b°cause-the he, is iiiissinv"
Not Miss Diana.”
Su' John Sinclair, in his time
me of the foremost men in Scot
.and lived at Edinburgh anil his
house there, some forty years ago, was
the home of his four daug‘ ters, all no
ticeably tall women The) made up, as
the father said, about “four and twenty
feet of daughters.” A good but not a
romantic story is told of one of them,
in connection with Lord Gla.s%ow, who,
when dining one day witii Sir ohn, told
his host that he had made up his mind
to be mniried
"I have decided, said ne, “after care-
ful consideration, that I cannot do bet
.cr than to secure the hand of one of
your daughters.
Sir John bowed, and evpressed his
fmtituds for the compliment “And may
ask 'Lofd Glasvow, said he which of
my daughters has attracted your
“Tliat Sir John,” returned his lord
ship, “I leave entirely to you I feel
that your knowledge of vour daughters
will enable, you to make a. far wiser se-
lection. than I could make.
“hour prudence is highly to your cre-
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dit,” said the fatlierw Let us Join the
ladies upstairs, andcl will at once indi `
JMB N&
cats to £u, in ii manner ou will under
stand,” choice which fv advise you to
qiggigwsxnisii, cnA1u.e'rfrnrowN
obod in Our Cit Have
Furr Ads ike Ours hei
are Like FUR
are the BEST
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 _ The Leading Purricrs