Panther Prints Tell It Like It Is by Lorne Caborn For this week’s article I will attempt to answer the age old question, ‘‘Are all men jerks?’’ Of course they are! Answering that was easier than I expected, oh, wait...you disagree? Allow me to explain myself. The reason all men are jerks, or at least seem like it, is because they’re the ones women are going out with. Women fall for jerks. Face it, when it comes to relationships, nice guys finish last. Why? Simple -- nice guys are BORING. Just ask anyone who has actually dated one, ‘‘He treats me really well, but’’ is the usual response. Women want excitment, intrigue, and like it or not, jerks offer this in abundance. Being in a relationship where nothing goes wrong is nice at first, but it tends to become a little predictable. No one enjoys that, so these ‘‘perfect’ ’ relationships tend to die out fast. On the other hand, a relationship with a jerk can last years. Just ask my ex-girlfriend. Still don’t believe me that all men are jerks? Take a second and think about past relationships, girls, or current ones as it may be. For ease, I’ve created a guide: 5 Ways To Tell If He’s A Jerk 1. If he’s ever said, ‘‘Birthday? It’s your birthday today?”’ 2. Uses the words, *‘We’re just friends’’ on an hourly basis. 3. Gets a call on the other line and has to let you go becuse it’s for his sister. 4. He doesn’t have a sister. 5. Your best friend knows where his birthmark is and you don’t. Reconize any of these traits? Chances are if you don’t you’ve got some of your own. Sure, all men are jerks but as the old saying goes, ‘‘If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”’ While being a jerk may not win over fans everywhere it does manage to keep your black book filled. I’m outta here for now but I’ll be back in full force next issue with my guide on ‘*How to cheat on the one you love,’’ As always you can email responses to lcabon@upei.ca. The Second Meeting Of The Island Acoustics Society The second meeting of the Island Acoustics Society took place recently at the University of Prince Edward Island. Members from the community involved in audio engineering, music, audiology and broadcast attended as well as faculty and staff from Holland College and UPEI. Pat Ellis, an audiologist from Provincial Audiology Clinic in Charlottetown and Marylou Hughes, an audiologist from Audiology Associ- ates of PEI, made a presentation on the effects of noise on hearing Mrs. Hughes described basic hearing mechanisms and how noise can damage the hair cells of the inner ear. She pointed out that recent developments in hearing protection allow for both transmission of wanted sound and reduction of unwanted sound. Mrs. Ellis went on to discuss noise in more detail, including the noise levels produced under common household, outdoor, and entertainment situations. The importance of observing provincial and federal noise exposure guidelines was emphasized as a means of preventing permanent hearing loss. After a lengthy question period, the group broke for refreshments courtesy of Audiology Associ- ates, an Atlantic Canada company that provides audiological services such as prescription of hearing aids, hearing protection and other assistive devices. Upon reconvening, Annabel Cohen displayed a preliminary version of an Acoustics Wall Chart being developed for educational purposes by the Institute of Acous- tics of Atlantic Canada. The chart illustrates the range of frequencies and intensities (also known as the longtime average spectrum) associated with different aspects of acoustics, for example, underwater acoustics, musical acoustics, animal bioacoustics, speech and ultrasound. Plans were made for meetings to alternate in location between the University and a community site every other month. The next meeting in November will be at Swans Speaker Systems in Pownal. Frank and Margie Hale, company President and Vice- president respectively, will describe the manu- facturing of their speaker systems, and provide listening demonstrations as well as demonstra- tions of new computer software for speaker design. In January, the meeting will focus on ultrasound. Dr. Mauricio Solano of the Atlantic Veterinary College will describe the basic principles of ultrasound diagnostic imaging and his application in animal pathology. Dr. Cathy Ryan from the Department of Psychology at UPEI will describe how the analysis of ultra- sound produced by infant rodents provides evidence of stress resulting from drugs taken by mothers during pregnancy. A meeting in March is planned for a site visit to the CBC sound recording studios (radio), conducted by Mr. Barry Vessey. Tentatively, a final meeting is planned for the season that will feature psychoacoustic demonstrations in conjunction with Professor Carl Mathis the UPEI Department of Music andand Mr. Bill Woods of Audioelectronics. For further information phone Dr. Geoff Ralling (566-0561), or Dr. Annabel Cohen (628- 4321) or send an email message to acoustics@upei.ca. The meetings are held under the auspices of the Department of Research and Development of UPEI, the Department of Psychology of UPEI and the Institute of Acous- tics of Atlantic Canada. COMI FROM THE CIRTLLOW OROTHER! WERE (AM, ALEX | | WEL My NAME'S GaterrTe! 1" ENDR, A COMPUTER. MiG ENGI MEER AT HENRT, STUCK 1 A FIRST YENR PHILOSOPHY Elective! 0 The Res Rap by Yvonne MacKean What’s up this week? Well, the big news, at least in Bernardine, is Halloween. As usual, there is a door decorating contest. There are prizes for the best door on each floor and best in the building. The floors are also being decorated. Once again, the daycare children will be touring the building to see the decorations. The Dining Hall is provid- ing a Halloween buffet. Best costume prizes, and some other Halloween games are planned for the students. Residence students from all three buildings are becoming involved in other Halloween activities. The first is trick-or-treating for the children of the Queen Elizabeth Hospital. This was done last year and was very successful. The second activity is SPOOKS. SPOOKS stands for Students Patrolling Our Outdoors for Kids Safety. The motivation for these activities is to get involved with the community and hopefully make Halloween safer and better for children. Some other activities on the go are a paintball outing by residents of Marian Hall, and plans for Christmas events (its not that far away!!). Until next time, this is the Res Rapper signing off! October 31 PSS By Yvonne MacKean The fireplace (or Shabadoo) lounge of Myron’s was the site of the gathering of faculty and students of the Political Studies department. The faculty were out in full force and appeared to have some animated discussions. The students present squared off at the pool tables. Military Dictator he may be, but Minnesota Fats. Egan Henderson is not!! In all fairness, he went one and one. Peter Clarey was also strutting his pool prowess. Some of the professors got into the action. Even after twenty some years of retirement, Henry ‘‘Sharkey’’ Srebrnik was on the ball, defeating fellow prof Gil Germain. As political studies people are prone to do, there were some deep philosophical discussions. The group remains divided on the question of which show is funnier -- Friends or Seinfeld. There was an anonymous motion to strike up a Parliamentary committee to further probe the issue. The President responded by promising to consider the suggestion. Needless to say, all enjoyed themselves. Political Studies students are reminded to watch for upcoming information in the Prints, on bulletin boards and from professors. A possible future event is a Christmas party, so try and keep’ some time open! HELPING THE WORLD WRITE NOW 8 CODE Self-sufficiency through literacy in the developing world For information, call 800-661-2633