Film:
      Way
      Down
      Town
     
    
   
   
    
     
      I
      can
      remember
      last
      year
      when
     
     
      Joel
      put
      his
      hands
      into
      the
      air,
     
     
      scrunched
      up
      his
      face,
      and
      ranted
      sar-
     
     
      castically
      about
      all
      the
      great
      movies
      to
     
     
      have
      come
      out
      of
      Canada
      while
      bend-
     
     
      ing
      backwards
      and
      widening
      his
     
     
      stance,
      knees
      bent.
      I
      can
      also
      remem-
     
     
      ber
      the
      large
      doses
      of
      opposition
      to
      be
     
     
      administered
      to
      the
      Fawlty
      Tower
      that
     
     
      was
      his
      mind.
      at
      that
      moment,
      opposi-
     
     
      tion
      voiced
      from
      a
      number
      of
      differ-
     
     
      ent-minded
      and
      nerdy
      Cadre
      jerk-
     
     
      wads.
      I
      can
      remember
      sitting
      in
      the
     
     
      corner
      and
      quietly
      laughing
      hyena-
     
     
      style,
      and
      being
      otherwise
      silent.
     
     
      Anyway
      Joel,
      this
      is
      for
      you,
      wherever
     
     
      you
      may
      be;
      a
      review
      of
      a
      Canadian
     
     
      film.
     
    

    
     
      As
      a
      young
      man
      sits
      in
      his
     
     
      office
      all
      day
      with
      people
      he
      doesn't
     
     
      like,
      he
      imagines
      a
      somewhat
      floating-
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Choice
      Cuts
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Jeff
      Morris
      Plays
      The
      Wave
     
    
   
   
    
     
      utopia
      where
      superheroes
      hold
      the
     
     
      earth
      up
      in
      small
      chunks
      of
      city.
      He's
     
     
      an
      intelligent
      young
      man
      who
      seems
      to
     
     
      be
      going
      cold
      of
      heart
      in
      the
      heart
      of
      a
     
     
      cold
      city
      without
      ever
      actually
      examin-
     
     
      ing
      his
      own
      code
      of
      ethics.
      All
      this
     
     
      changes
      when
      he
      becomes
      the
      victim
     
     
      of
      moral
      luck
      through
      a
      joke
      thought
     
     
      to
      be
      of
      no
      consequence.
      What
      will
      he
     
     
      do
      to
      fix
      the
      problem
      he's
      created
      for
     
     
      those
      people?
      Is
      it
      really
      his
      place
      to
     
     
      step
      in,
      and
      if
      it
      is,
      will
      he
      have
      the
     
     
      courage
      to
      do
      it?
     
    

    
     
      This
      is
      a
      well-done
      and
      inter-
      —
     
     
      esting
      film
      about
      modern
      social
      ethics;
     
     
      What
      should
      an
      individual
      do
      when
     
     
      faced
      with
      such
      an
      ethical
      question?
     
     
      How
      does
      this
      individual
      believe
      they
     
     
      should
      act,
      how
      will
      the
      individual
      act,
     
     
      and
      what
      empathetic
      results
      may
      all
      of
     
     
      this
      have...
      and
      what
      about
      you?
     
    
   
   
    
     
      -Brad
      DIEGHAN
     
    
   
   
    
     
      On
      Saturday
      I
      went
      to
      The
      Wave
      to
     
     
      watch
      another
      instalment
      of
      Bill
      and
     
     
      Ed's
      Excellent
      Adventures
      (Billy
      and
     
     
      Eddy
      are
      bar-keeps)
      and
      when
      they
     
     
      started
      to
      bore
      me
      I
      turned
      my
      atten-
     
     
      tion
      to
      the
      real
      reason
      I
      was
      at
      The
     
     
      Wave:
      To
      see
      Jeff
      Morris.
     
    

    
     
      I
      stuck
      around
      for
      the
      evening
     
     
      to
      see
      the
      show,
      which
      I
      feel
      went
      over
     
     
      very
      well.
      They
      played
      for
      quite
      a
     
     
      while,
      and
      in
      the
      end
      must
      have
      played
     
     
      Cellophane
      Girl
      a
      bizillion
      times.
      For
     
     
      the
      most
      part
      they
      played
      their
      own
     
     
      songs,
      but
      they
      covered
      Radiohead,
     
     
      Weezer,
      and
      U2.
      They
      were
      able
      to
     
     
      cover
      Weezer
      very
      well;
      in
      fact
      I'd
      call
     
     
      Jeff
      Morris
      very
      Weezeresque.
      This
     
     
      Weezer
      similarity
      carries
      over
      to
      their
     
     
      CD,
      which
      has
      keyboard
      and
      electro-
     
     
      gadgets
      strung
      throughout.
      The
      music
     
    
   
   
    
     
      is
      very
      good
      listening;
      something
      that
      I
     
     
      could
      listen
      to
      while
      working
      or
      typ-
     
     
      ing,
      or
      maybe
      driving
      on
      a
      long
      stretch
     
     
      of
      road.
      And
      if
      there's
      a
      teen
      aged
      girl
     
     
      near
      by
      you
      can't
      go
      wrong
      with
      the
     
     
      song
      Cellophane
      Girl.
      The
      music
      wont
     
     
      bore
      you
      to
      death,
      but
      it
      wont
      get
      your
     
     
      juices
      flowing
      into
      a
      ruffiant
      mess
     
     
      either.
     
    

    
     
      Then
      I
      asked
      them,
      off
      the
      top
     
     
      of
      their
      heads,
      to
      name
      the
      place
      where
     
     
      they
      had
      just
      played.
      They
      thought
      the
     
     
      alcove
      could
      be
      named
      The
      Slab,
      The
     
     
      Splash,
      or
      The
      Puddle.
      I
      like
      the
      sound
     
     
      of
      The
      Slab,
      but
      I'm
      going
      to
      stick
      to
     
     
      "The
      Underwater
      Grotto
      of
      Lights
      and
     
     
      Sound."
      It's
      just
      so
      catchy.
     
    
   
   
    
     
      -Thomas
      LLOYD
     
    
   
   
    
     
      A
      Review
      on
      Reviewing
      and
      a
      Non-Ridiculous
      Silly
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Review
      of
      the
      Ridiculous.
     
     
      By
      Brad
      DIEGHAN
     
    
   
   
    
     
      I
      question
      the
      ability
      for
      a
      per-
     
     
      son
      to
      review
      something
      -
      anything
      -
     
     
      for
      another,
      when
      the
      goal
      of
      the
     
     
      review
      is
      to
      "let
      the
      other
      know"
     
     
      whether
      something
      is
      "good",
      "bad",
      or
     
     
      something
      altogether
      different.
     
     
      Whatever
      the
      subject
      may
      be
      (a
      film,
      a
     
     
      cd,
      the
      new
      John
      Deere
      can
      opener,
      a
     
     
      book,
      etc...),
      there
      is
      no
      "good",
      no
     
     
      "bad".
      In
      a
      review
      of
      this
      kind
      there
      is
     
     
      only
      opinion,
      it's
      completely
      objective.
     
     
      I
      might
      like
      the
      movie
      Eraserhead,
      I
     
     
      might
      say
      it's
      an
      amazing
      film,
      but
      you
     
     
      might
      watch
      it
      and
      say
      it
      sucks,
      you
     
     
      might
      say
      it's
      crazy
      and
      makes
      no
     
     
      apparent
      sense.
      It's
      just
      two
      different
     
     
      opinions.
      The
      movie
      may
      actually
     
     
      make
      no
      apparent
      sense,
      this
      may
      be
     
     
      true,
      but
      does
      that
      really
      mean
      it
     
     
      sucks?
      Well,
      maybe
      for
      you,
      but
      for
     
     
      someone
      else
      it
      may
      be
      the
      equivalent
     
     
      to
      your
      ecstatic
      love
      of
      chocolate
      milk,
     
     
      the
      Blarney
      stone,
      or
      Malibu
      Barbie.
      In
     
     
      any
      case,
      all
      I'm
      saying
      is
      that
      a
      review
     
     
      shouldn't
      decide
      for
      the
      reader,
      it
     
     
      should
      only
      give
      enough
      information
     
     
      so
      that
      the
      reader
      may
      decide
      whether
      .
     
    
   
   
    
     
      [12]
      *
      de
      *
      oe
      oe
      CS
      o
      We
      hee
      me
      ee
      he
     
     
      ’
     
    
   
   
    
     
      or
      not
      to
      check
      it
      out,
      and
      then
      whether
     
     
      or
      not
      it
      is
      "good",
      "bad",
      or
      something
     
     
      completely
      different,
      like
      Monty
     
     
      Python's
      And
      Now
      for
      Something
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Completely
      Different.
      (Completely
      dif-
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ferent.
      really.)
     
    
   
   
    
     
      “That
      no-good
      rotten-
     
     
      twig
      off
      a
      not-so-
     
     
      healthy-looking-
      |
     
     
      shrubbery-tree
      nin-
     
     
      compoop!"
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Monty
      Python.
      We’ve
      all
     
     
      heard
      of
      it.
      If
      you
      haven’t
      -
      What
      is
      it?
     
     
      Well...
      Monty
      Python's
      a
      unique
      blend
     
     
      of
      intelligent
      English
      history,
      politics,
     
     
      social
      commentary,
      and
      silly.
      A
      series
     
     
      of
      low-budget
      short
      skits
      and
      a
      few
     
     
      mind
      popping
      movies,
      very
      efficient
     
     
      acting,
      and
      English
      accents
      from
      the
     
     
      aristocracy
      to
      the
      peasant.
      With
      Monty
     
     
      Python
      you
      get
      such
      a
      ridiculous
     
     
      amount
      of
      silly
      that
      it
      may
      seem
      quite
     
     
      ridiculous
      for
      any
      of
      you
      who
      may
      not
     
     
      be
      used
      to
      this
      sort
      of
      ridiculously
     
    
   
   
    
     
      *
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ridiculous
      ridiculous,
      so
      I'll
      warn
      you;
     
     
      it
      is
      ridiculously
      ridiculous
      in
      a
      serious
     
     
      way.
      Now,
      in
      case
      you
      haven't
      noticed,
     
     
      this
      article
      is
      getting
      quite
      ridiculous,
     
     
      in
      fact,
      so
      ridiculous
      that
      it
      may
      be
     
     
      nearing
      the
      ridiculously
      silly
      to
      be
     
     
      found
      in
      the
      actual
      subject
      matter.
      No
     
     
      matter,
      for
      when
      it
      comes
      to
      the
      seri-
     
     
      ously
      silly
      subject
      of
      ridiculous,
      I
      am
     
     
      quite
      competent,
      due
      to
      the
      fact
      that
      I
     
     
      may
      be
      incompetent.
     
    

    
     
      A
      tall
      stern
      man
      with
      a
      mus-
     
     
      tache
      and
      an
      army
      suit
      bursts
      into
      the
     
     
      room,
      he
      shakes
      his
      pointing
      stick
      like
     
    
   
   
    
     
      ‘a
      mother's
      nagging
      finger.
      "Stop
      that,
     
    
   
   
    
     
      that's
      silly!
      Now,
      everything
      was
      ok
     
     
      until
      you
      went
      and
      said
      something
     
     
      foolish
      like
      how
      ridiculous
      you
      may
     
     
      be.
      I
      think
      it
      is
      quite
      obvious
      that
      you
     
     
      are
      really
      too
      silly
      to
      be
      seriously
     
     
      taken
      as
      ridiculous,
      and
      I
      think
      that
      is
     
     
      an
      insult
      to
      the
      seriousness
      of
      the
     
     
      Python's
      silly!
      I
      won't
      have
      it!
      I
      don't
     
     
      want
      to
      see
      anymore
      ridiculousness
      out
     
     
      of
      you!
      If
      I
      have
      to
      come
      back,
      you
     
     
      will
      see
      how
      foolish
      you
      really
      were
      in
     
     
      trying
      to
      be
      silly".
      A
      sixteen
      tonne
     
    
   
   
    
     
      *
     
     
      heehee
      hee
      ee
     
     
      o
      ee
      &
     
    
   
   
    
     
      i
      RR
      ee
     
     
      tee
      We
      ae
      eR
      de
      bohe
      bebe
      &
     
    
   
   
    
     
      weight
      falls
      from
      the
      sky
      crushing
      the
     
     
      military
      man.
      "Sorry
      about
      that,”
      says
     
     
      the
      director,
      popping
      his
      head
      onto
      the
     
     
      screen,
      "we've
      just
      fired
      our
      writer,
     
     
      won't
      happen
      again."
      He
      leaves
      the
     
     
      screen
      muttering
      the
      words
      silly,
      and
     
     
      nincompoop.
      "That
      no-good
      rotten-
     
     
      twig
      off
      a
      not-so-healthy-looking-
     
     
      shrubbery-tree
      nincompoop!"
     
    

    
     
      Goodbye,
      and
      good-riddance
      is
     
     
      the
      reply.
     
    
   
   
    
     
         
     
    
   
   
    
     
      Showing
      at
     
     
      City
      Cinema
     
    
   
   
    
     
      this
      week
     
    
   
   
    
     
      The
      Importance
      of
     
     
      Being
      Earnest
     
    

    
     
      ;
      and
     
    

    
     
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      Queens
     
    
   
   
    
     
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      and
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