Winter Season By Sam Okello Low, hovering clouds obscure the sun from the sight; The morning comes too late; too soon the night; From the sea cold winds with fury sweep, Criss-crossing thru forests and farms down the valleys; Snow emerges and brightens all things in its path, With frigid blast and all too wicked wrath, Lakes and rivers are covered with ice, And trees once garbed in green now naked stand, Mother nature seems unkind to this foresaken world, Nonetheless, it’s hard to believe Canadians go out and build snowmen, and ski and skate and play hockey: It’s fun to natives but but a shock to foreigners; We helplessly remain indoors screaming “It’s too cold and grim and white out there!” -~ There is more to endure than to enjoy. Theme song for applicant to any major political party (Based on ‘Everybody Wants to Rule the World’, by Tears for Fears.) Verse I Welcome to our Party, There’s no turning back, For we'll look while you sleep, And we will find you And make you act on your best behaviour; Turn your back on Mother Nature, for Everybody wants to rule Canada. Verse ITI It’s our old desire, It’s our lack of remorse, Help us to decide ‘ How to make the Most of freedom and of pleasure, for Nothing ever lasts forever, and Everybody wants to rule Canada. Verse III There’s a room where the cops may find you, Stuffing ballots while the walls come tumbling down; If this happens we'll be right behind you, So glad we almost made it, So glad you had to blow it; Everybody wants to rule Canada. Verse IV We can’t stand opposition, And we hate the smell of controversy. Everybody wants to rule Canada. Say that you'll never, never, never leave us, Or forsake us for another political party; Everybody wants to rule Canada. It’s all for freedom and for pleasure, Nothing ever lasts forever, Everybody wants to rule Canada. —Malcolm Gorrill Blame Alcohol LENNOXVILLE (CUP) — Almost a third of first-year students at Bishop’s Univer- sity failed a mandatory writ- ing test this Fall. The writing test was taken this year by 526 stu- dents. Twenty-seven per cent failed. ; “A lot of (students) don’t write very much in classes,” said Margaret Red- ding, director of the Writ- ing Proficiency Programme. “They accumulate marks on quizzes and mid-terms which only require short answers. The test catches most of them.” Some students who took the test attributed the re- sults to drunkenness. “It was a bad time in Frosh, Week,” said Anthony Milonas. “Everyone was half drunk.” “T failed. I was’ im- paired,” said Jeff Sprecker. According to -a_ recent survey by Southam News, 8 per cent of Canadian univer- sity graduates are function- ally illiterate. . si sme o¢ ciaeany Gtole/sthFy oder) PRoFUse MumbuNne —? QUE Tb BRAIN ovERLOAD all personal Foomung sculls R MESSY Clots of <— HA 4 ia tems Bie PuRPLE-~ . 2 weeus ) BLS GALS UndeR EVES 7 “ vi Sunke, K cheeks Uargets te eat-) Glutevs mMAumvsS _ No LonueR eaesenr Cleft 0 cha) in Cameor WEARING SOCKS Cforqot shoes in Rother Fard ) EXES BARELY SHowNe LIFE CCTARING wT SPACE) LAK oF sHOULNER 4 BACK ad over mascres Compt Or), sag bbrary chars! FRom FUIPPIAG THROM < HANS COO ene nage uf ‘eb anole, leas weAK Awo Ge~T OvT Clack of nurisbment > Tar Re Hee.” ¢ oe extessize Ta? ARE RAMPANT O€ enn? (-FoR A LIMITED Time ONLY Ml Pru 5? aK WOULD THE PERSON who is taking down a certain notice at the Robertson Li- brary please contact me at the place as per notice. Let’s be reasonable about this. CAROLINE MACLEOD... I Think you’re sexy too... And an Engineer is much more desireable than an Athlete... Give ME your body. —Anonymous HAPPY B-DAY WEE- NIE. Don’t forget you have a test tomorrow! See you on your face. WELCOME BACK from the fair Brett. Hope all your tests are negative. - The Class ATTENTION: Brett is back from the fair in T.O. but is QUARINTINED un- til they know exactly what made it shrivel up! -“Dr. Suzuki” For sale Yamaha Clavi- nova Piano 8mo. old. and in excellent condition. Phone 892-9992. ATTENTION all future senior business students... get the hell out while you can!!!! —‘Experienced’ pol- icy students. TO ALL senior business students... See you at the barn on Friday, November 27, 1987. It will be one hell of a party... We deserve it!!!! CAROLINE MACLEOD... I Think you're sexy, too... And an Engineer is much more desireable than an Athlete... Give ME your body. ROOM AVAILABLE. Short walk from UPEI. Fully furnished, living area, bath- room and kitchen area. Call 566-4795. TO ALL DRIVERS: It only takes a second to avoid apuddle, so show some con- sideration and don’t splash people. —A pedestrian Congratulations to Doug, Jason, Lisa, Mary Ellen, and Trevor. We’re all BEHIND you. See you at the next gathering. MARIAN HALL WILL concede defeat starting Mon. Nov. 16 in the hands of the engineers and from the top there is only one place to go, and that is down!!!!! Female roomate wanted to share an appartment in Marysfield. $230 per month, heat and electricity included. Call 892-3714 MEMBERS OF the UPEI community can put ANY- THING in Five Lines Free (The Gem Unclassifieds) as long as it is tasteful. Items for sale must be private items. You can place as many ads as you like, and ads may run for more than one issue. Please drop your submissions at our office, Rm. 01 Utility Bldg. or at the SU office in the Barn.