The Legend of Gentleman 
     
    
   
   
    
     ‘Once upon a time, in a 
     
     Kingdom close close by, 
     
     there lived a-King. This 
     
     King served on many courts 
     
     in other Kingdoms, known 
     
    

    
     as the courts of I.L.C.C. 
     
     He grew in rank until the 
     
     peasants believed him to be 
     
     the great god of booze. 
     
     Every week the peasants 
     
     -payed homage to the great 
     
     god by attending to his 
     
     many round tables in his 
     
     courtyard known as Gentle- 
     
     man Arthur's. For the King 
     
     was called King Arthur. 
     
     While the King was away, 
     
     the Knight in favour at 
     
     ‘the time took care of these 
     
     peasants. This Knight was 
     
     known as Lord Brownie. 
     
    

    
     Now Lord Brownie was a nice 
     
     'lord, as lords go, but the 
     
     ladies of the court inter- 
     
     ‘ested him more. ‘ 
     
    

    
     The King called his peas— 
     
     ,ants together by the blar~1 
     
     ing of the music. They 
     
     became so mesmerized by 
     
     this music, that they left 
     
     700 — 1,200 in tithes be- 
     
     fore they.realized that they 
     
     had been hypnotized by the 
     
     spinning of the wagon wheel. 
     
     They also realized that it 
     
     was not the state of Eu— 
     
     phoria they believed it 
     
     to be. When the lights 
     
     went on and the music stop— 
     
     ped, the peasants were left 
     
     in a smoke filled room with 
     
     their empty pgckets for 
     
     company. You see, the King 
     
     and the Lord charged 90¢ 
     
     for a drink for their 
     
     treasure chest had to be 
     
     filled before the peasants 
     
     realized what was going on. 
     
     The King was beginning to 
     
     believe that he was in- 
     
     vinCible in his goal for 
     
     more and more gold. 
     
    

    
     As a special concession to 
     
     the peasants, to show how 
     
     much he loved them, he 
     
     lowered his prices one night 
     
     of the week. (Peasants as 
     
     you know, lapped this kind 
     
     ’of generosity up.) This 
     
     night was called peasant 
     
     night. 
     
    

    
     Now, it just so happened 
     
     that the King was beginning 
     
     to feel threatened by the 
     
     Queen of a neighboring 
     
     kingdon, and in order to 
     
     keep peace, sanity and his 
     
     wealth, he sent Lord Brown- 
     
     ie to investigate the weekly 
     
     follies at the Queen's Barn. 
     
     The King felt that the Queen 
     
     may be drawing his peasants 
     
     loyalty away fromkhis court 
     
     of Gentleman Arthur's. 
     
    

    
     Even his loyal lordly lord 
     
     was'showing his own dis- 
     
     loyalty by entedng into the 
     
     Queen's Barn to participate 
     
     in the frolic. 
     
    

    
     Do you think that this King 
     
     would resort to bribing the 
     
     Queen in order to bring the 
     
     peasants loyalty back by ' 
     
     offering to lower his prices? 
     
     if only the peasants would 
     
     return. 
     
    

    
     Meanwhile, the King strikes 
     
     at his servants with his ‘ 
     
    
   
   
    
     \ 
     
    
   
   
    
     THE owns, -'I'UES., OCT; 23‘, 1973 
     
    
   
   
    
     Arthur’s 
     
    
   
   
    
     H{ v. ‘ V'vf‘uw v; 
     
    
   
   
    
     Page 5 
     
    
   
   
    
     @tntleman Arthur’s: QEuurtpath 
     
    
   
   
    
     ‘ The 33111;; of 
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
     vile tongue lashings when, 
     
    

    
     of course, he goes off the 
     
     bottle. The king was a 
     
     tricky one off or on the 
     
     bottle. The ladies in 
     
     waiting who served the 
     
     drinks to the peasants were 
     
     paid by how much tithes they 
     
     got for selling booze. When 
     
     the paying peasants left, and 
     
     the evening of "enjoyment" 
     
     was over, the ladies in waits 
     
     ing Were left with the mess 
     
    
   
   
    
     to clean up. They really didn't 
     
    
   
   
    
     have to clean the goblets , 
     
     off the tables and wipe them 
     
     and clean the ashtrays, but 
     
     they were told it was their 
     
    
   
   
    
       
     
    
   
   
    
        
     
    
   
   
    
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     job to do such good deeds for 
     
     the king, even though they 
     
     were not rewarded for their 
     
     efforts. 
     
    

    
     Such is the Kingdom of 
     
     heaven and so it be the King- 
     
     dom of King Arthur. And the 
     
     peasants didn't live happily 
     
     ever after. , 
     
    

    
     Moral: Is the King nothing 
     
     without the peasants, or 
     
     are the peasants nothing 
     
     without the King. 
     
    
   
   
    
     by- LoCoMoFo 
     
    
   
   
    
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