Mullets, hotdogs, Shinerama, eird noises, Lamas (that’s right - only e “]”), an old lady in tights, guys in esses, rubber chicken flinging, ackley Beach in the cold, New Kids the Block impersonators, sour aut, dog food, chants, and cheers: nese are just a few memories that and out from my experience with ew Student Orientation 2001 (NSO). course, I could talk about the great ngs we accomplished this year: an iting atmosphere for new students, 600 raised for cystic fibrosis, and any new friendships blossoming in e breeze. But that’s only a small part what NSO was all about.

VP Campaigns and Communications Caolan Moore demonstrates to a new student how he got elected.

NSO at the beach.

I can’t imagine what it was

like for a new student. The random selection of teams, and the fate of all who joined them, was decided by the colour of the bandana that was thrown your way. Whether you were a Super Cougar, Mojo Monkey, or Hungry Buzzard your alliance with a particular group of lunatics for the next five days depended on a simple bandana.

Teams racked up points in dif- ferent events by demonstrating their school spirit and creativity through activities and cheers. The sand sculpt- ing and races at the beach were so much fun that even the leaders were tired out before returning to the uni- versity for Playfair. Enter an old lady in tights leading the hugest group activity I’ve ever seen. As an NSO leader myself, I thought this was a pretty sweet time. Everyone partici- pated; anyone who requested one got a standing ovation, and everyone was treated equally.

The entire week following the opening day was great. The game show parody, Tribal Feud, was a huge success, having the new students work together in their teams to guess answers to questions. The Absolutely- No-Talent-Show was _ absolutely wacky, with the Crazy Lamas team performing a safari which included a real live llama (courtesy of the Gouda Cheese Lady). And nobody will forget how the Shorty-Longbacks sacrificed a blond haired first year student to their clan by chopping her hair into a mullet. Apparently, this was her own enthusiastic decision to help her team leap ahead in the competition. She

responded to her new mullet cut with: “It’s not just a haircut, it’s a lifestyle.” As if that weren’t enough, the evening closed with a murder mystery by Steve Forbes.

Shinerama 2001 was a big success: $6600 was raised for cystic fibrosis. NSO participants canvassed the city with donation boxes and shoe shiners in hand. But shoe shining was not all that was done for money. Students danced jigs, sang (“I’m a lit- tle teapot’) and were taped to poles in order to encourage sandal-wearing bystanders to donate too.

I can’t even explain on paper the messy wonder of the Adventure Explosion. Food, slides, Jell-O, and one lucky cod. This wild obstacle course was probably the roughest part of the week, if not the stinkiest. Participants had to go down a slide of water, dish soap, and maybe a little bit of ketchup (I might add that this com- bination of cleaning products and condiments allows you to pick up amazing speed.). Then to a pool full of Jell-O and marshmallows to pick a water balloon out with your teeth, fol- lowed by a tunnel of mayonnaise, peas (not my personal favourite), relish and other unidentified stuff. The mess was not so bad, until it was followed by maple syrup and flour. Next, a tub that I didn’t venture into: There was some- thing about the cod floating in it that discouraged me from entering. This was followed by climbing up a slip-

Confessions of an NSO Leader

By Carrie MACLELLAN

pery slide of assorted slimes, only to fall into an unpleasant pool of liquid with dog food, pickles, olives, and other products. There was sour kraut somewhere too.

Next up was the hypnotist. NSO coordinator Chris Power booked “Sailesh” for a supposedly clean show of good old fashion hypnotism. What followed was a night of good laughs and disgusted groans. The concept of a clean show was completely aban- doned after a few students were put in compromising positions.

Rounding out the end of NSO was the Big Island House Party which saw lots of fun and dancing with new buddies made over the weekend. Thanks to some inflatable rental gear, new students also got the chance to kick their leaders’ asses with huge boxing gloves, an inflatable sumo suit, or some rubber chickens. The inflat- able combat was fun, but for me, there’s nothing better than throwing yourself into a velcro wall while lis- tening to “Baby Got Back.” Perfect.

Thursday ended with the fan- tastic Founder’s Day event, complete with the NSO chant led by President MacLaughlin and Chris Power. In the end, the winning team was the Shorty- Longbacks with their mullet-attitude and massive school spirit. On

Thursday night everyone rocked out to the Burt Neilsen Band at the back to school pub, which sold out less than ten minutes after doors opened.

Ouchers.

the cadre