UPEI Directors Invest Funds

The UPEI Board of Directors today announced that the funds acquired from the sale of the planetarium will be used to pur- chase a structure of more mod- ern significance. They are paying $100,000 to purchase the recon- ditioned Challenger space shut- tle. ”The university was decid- edly profituitous in the acquisi- tion of the aforementioned phal- lic symbo!. It was slightly de- valued after a minor mishap with

some O-nion rings,” said a UPEI spokesperson, who wished to re- main anonymous.

The shuttle will be used pri- marily as a really tacky conversa- tion piece. It is hoped that exces- sive complaints from the masses will drown out tne whining of stu- dents living in the gutters during the 1991 winter games.

File photo of Challenger circa 1982.

horrorscopes

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through the torment

winter store to work off this sum

marks needed to pass your class, but you didn

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OUGH TO SWALLON

Seafood ... Raw, Alas poor dolphin! Ben Casey photo _

God in Charge: Terri Lyn Hall Demi-God: Dave MacKinnon Demi-God:

Jim McGrath Demi-God on pension: Sean MacIntosh Office Entertainment: Sue Rigney Typer? Simon Berge

Donations Coordinator:

Ian Wood

Funnies Guy:

Liam Whitty MUG-type-person: Matthew Willis Another typer? John Doucette

Staff Giggler: Kheng-Wee Wah Submission Policy

We don’t have a sub- mission policy, but we don’t print anything that isn’t typed, handwritten, — scrawled in blood, thrown throw our window attached to a brick, or sent in a mail- bomb.

If you want to come to the office, go ahead, we are not responsible for per- sonal injuries. And don’t open the fridge.

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