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Sports Editorial Best of Charlottetown

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MC eT a Cat TT

Charlotietown’s most trusted news source.

Editorial 04: The Newspaper is Dead.

You are fucking lucky.

You probably picked this school because , “[UPEI] was real- ly cheap and I was really lazy and I didn’t get off my ass to apply to another university I wanted to go to.” [p.4]

And mostly you probably got what you deserved. But now you are here during the guilded age of the student newspaper: The Cadre.

Read the Guardian sports section and tell me there is any- thing this true:

“There was a beer tent at Saturday’s game but it did not appear to increase student atten- dance. However, fans’ responses to the referees calls seemed to be increased.” [p.14]

Find a better summation of the Atlantic Film festival than SML’s losers are winners [p.12]. Send it to me, and if I agree, if it even comes close, I will give you twenty bucks. I am very serious about the offer. It does not have to be published or even fully written. I will be accepting any competitors to Stephan’s reviews all month and the entry deadline can be extended if you have a particularly com- pelling reason, or if you are hot.

Next I wish to discuss the status of our competitors on this Island. I would like to discuss how we can boldly state, without a trace of irony, that. The Cadre is Charlottetown’s “Most trusted news source.” The reasons are too long to mention but let us say that a lack of decent funding never kept this paper from publishing com- pelling and funny content.

Not as funny as now you

understand; now we are rich with technology and riches. Now we are much funnier than anyone else has ever been except maybe the Smurfs. They were funny and blue and midgets. There is no compet- ing with that.

Speaking of funny, for |

those of you who haven’t figured it out but are the editorial reading types, the idea is to pull out The Faction, fold it backwards and begin. Seriously, Jeff will have an aneurism soon if the good people don’t cooperate, so just do like it says.

Penultimately, I would like to make mention of the two million pound snowball that has become Triskaidekapohbia. We have now confirmed ten acts for the show.

Five will play upstairs and five will play downstairs. began as a lark type idea has now gained the potential of being a truly amazing night of music with no poetry at all.

But The Cadre, unlike the show on October the 13th, Friday the 13th for which tickets are now on sale at The Barn, Bookstore and The Cadre, will soon have poetry. That’s right.

Get ready to cringe you noodle armed verse haters, the stanzas are coming. If you are a poet, or know one, or live with one, or have a friend who likes poetry, or likes to tell women he writes poetry, then we want your submis- sions. Seriously, we want any poet- ry you can dream of or to.

And photos of you too. If you are hot.

What |

Marc Macdonald

Apvenrising Manacen Stephan Macleod

Reporter James Scheib PHOTOGRAPHER Shawn Sears

_ Contamuters

Legal

The Cadre is the official newspaper Of the UPEI Student Union. It is print- ed 10 times per semester. 2000 Copies are distributes on and off campus on Wednesdays.

The opinions expressed within The Catire do not necessarily represent the views of UPEI or UPEI Student Union Inc. _

who wishes to attend on Wedlnestiays at 5:00 in Main 06.