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J _ _ , _ ‘ g- _ U _ ‘ -._ -_ _ ___“l Flroplled the unbitlous ""' ' ' " ' “ ' ' "' ' . » elmanﬂw en you u. AFEW scaxrcnzs oven FIELD V giaaapgi gi '_ —‘—-— . . ‘ —-—" I , z i‘ =33"! 90h, , _ tie begun ~01." on; in. Gallagher; om w. r no»: a . h _ ~ -. y = Qgilgghe-r, pg: T“; 11v?"

Do you ever have the chilbiains when in bed’! Every night they bother mo; I'm as itchy as can.

be. and oftimee 1 do wish that I were v ' deed.‘

Mr. Sheen

l m . sn . 0h! oh r a“ hives that l

‘Its when I have the

feel mean; " my guard, And I've got to scratch to herd. ' Don't that look bad Mr. GB-IIBKMI" Res, but it FEELS GOOD Mr.

Sh . w‘ --By ammo. r ‘ ESPECIALLY IN WASHINGTON "Don't you smell something burn~

._,..

"Ne; {don't think! do."

4'1 don't either; but most people glo if you ask them." -

) UNGONTROLLABLE

‘II understand you are helping t0 -_hold an investigation."

“Not strictly speaking," answered Senator Sorghum. "This investiga- tion has got past the place where pnybody can hold lt."—-

EVlE RYBODY HAPPY

Maid-"No ma'a.m, Mrs. Pughes ls out."

visitor-“How fortunate! When (l saw her peeping through the our~ talus as I came up the path I was so afraid she would IDS in."

A DIG FROM LONDON

Dr. Mersing claims that he caus- ed a mouse to grow almost as large as a cat. We understand that he has already received many inquir» ies from iellowsAmericans if he can do the stuff any cheaper by the case.

“CONTRIBUTORY NEGLIGENCE"

“That cut was caused fby her ring. your lHonor. lShe struck ms in the face with her clenched ﬁst," complained the young husband.

“Where did she get ~the ring?" questioned the magistrate.

i‘! gave it to her. it was our eu- gagement ring." _

"The prisoner .is discharged. That is clearly a case of contribu- tory negligence," said the Judge. >-_--_ii_-

Search Your Attic or Office

You may not realize that the old postage stamps on thc old let- ters you have kept for years may be worth many dollars. p

I suggest you look them over, sending me any stamps used be- fore 1873.

Be sure to leave the stamps on the envelopes just as iound.—Aci 'now and realize cash.--I will remit promptly. ‘

her!" Small Boy-Fthbody ainlt come t Pa says the iiret fellow

y“; b“ have her."

that comes can HER FIRST WIDE

Weekly) , Unttrom, aged 56 yous.- {months and l8 days. Deceased was a mild-mannered pir. ate with emouth full or tobacco. He came to this town in the night

Aunt Rachel, the old colored ser~ vent. had returned from her lint utomdblle ride. _ "Well. Anal Blew. enjoy your ride?“ “Fine, Boss. tihem oars. is wonderful 1.1111188!" s awn; u, go again-sometime?‘ "New. sub. one one"! 8W1!" M‘. me. 1 didnlt dare to let my whole, weight out all the time I was in thel

thing." GIAAROING AGAINST INFvEGTIION

The stranger wasaakillS E 10¢ °Y questions about the villa-Be. Mid m6 oldest inhabitant was doing his best to answer him. -

“And Ihow about the water HIP-I ply? What precautions do you take against infection ‘."’ "Well. ﬁrst of all, we ‘bolls it. zur."

ilGood."

“And then we distila it." "Fine, And then?" “And then. zur, we __di'inks moon- shine."

HARD HEADED

A cart containing a number of liegrio field hands was lbeing drawn by a mule. The driver. a darky of twenty. was eudeavoring toiinduce the mule to increase its speed. when suddenly the animal let ﬂy with its heels and dealt him such a ilcick on the head that he was

ling. die lay rubbing his woolly pate where the mule had kicked him.

anxiously of an old negro who had jumped from the conveyance and was standing over the prostrate driver.

"No, boss," was the old darky's reply. ‘idat mule will proh'ly walk kind o‘ tendah for a day or two. but he ain't hurt."

-—---<0>-——+- ASSAULT AND BATTERY Thomas Jefferson Jackson, a large colored gentleman, was being tried for assault and battery upon his wife Irene. The judge asked him to state his case.

“Jedge, Ah's a hardwnrkin‘ man. Ah is, T’otlier day All comes home all tired from mah work. Ah looks round to‘ mah wife and don‘ see her.

stretched on the ground in a twink. "

‘ils he hurtj!" asked a stranger.

with another man's wife and joined u... cburdh. end mania hear aim

_ Dray lilor sin blocks and see him epic new-did m“: or». m. I .

11107 In" sides- meat bills. etc, all over town.

owes several dolls n forlthie paper, b‘;

Handled 81881118. “Jesus Paid it All, and we think he was rignt_ for he never paid anything.

-Suitor (paearonateiy)--"My love is like the, deep, deep sea."

‘His Loved One-"And H Inks it with the corresponding amount or salt." a

--————bO>---- Ul1d86-—"H0W We! 1t you manag ed to take the man's watch 1mm m“ Waistcoat Docket when it was secured by a patent satety catch?"

‘PNWY. the Dickimck ‘ "My fee. YOIIr Worship, is a quid ifor a tull course of six lessons." '

-———-<-e>_-__ "$13G ain't you de feller vat .1 met in Philadelphia?" ‘lpmlﬂdelbhia? I ain't never ‘been dere." l“Vell, nelder have I. 1 guess it must have been two odder tellers." . __,@______

IN LIGHTER VEIN

"You're not the only pebble on the beach." hissed ‘the goose. "You're no Plymouth Rock your sell! answered the rooster mom

Black-‘Wigllll. how much you gittin' to‘ workin’ heah?’ Tan-"Ten dollars per." Iilack-"What! Ten dollars per day?"

Tan~"NoW; perhaps."

lCanlein-"laoys, the boat is sink. 111E. its there any one here who knows now to pray?"

Parson (eagerly)—-“I do."

Cantain-“All right, you pray; the rest of us will put on life belts. There's one ally."

Little Harry—-".l wont to get a bale of hay."

IMIOIYIHRH-“What do you with it’! is i-t for your lather?"

Little Harry-“No, sir, its for guy horse."

want

Miss PFIINTEWS LATEST

SLA DER

‘ ‘Are you sure thong ﬂeidglasses IN Irish mower!" asked the My

o .

~~ilAP9HL 12.51924

BHILIJHEN cm run “Iiiilllilli?

Aiiarmiess.

Mother! ‘Fldhher’: Oestoria beenlnueofoleverwyeerstore- lieve babies and children of 0on- sti fzion, Flnhrlency, Wind Gallo‘

Diarrhea; eile Feverlehnen erisin therefrom, a. , by reguhtl ing Stomach and Bawels, aids the assimilation of Food; giving‘

III-L THEFIEWITH _ ‘tire tlhere any marks on the baby?" asked the anxious rather. The doctor looked the new arriv- al over carefully and replied, “Yes, he's marked C. O. D."

NOT CATGHI NO

Kitty: Come in and see our new

by.

Teacher: 1ihank you; but 1 will wait until your mother is ibetter. KittyuYmu needn't be adraid.~dt‘s not catching.

NO DANGER

Coal Merchant-JQuick! Quick! My coal yardﬁs aiiirel" .

d~‘irema.n-—-“0h. Is it? Well, it the stul! be the same as you sold ms t'other day. there ain't no ‘ur-ry!"

'———-¢0>-i-- FORBIDDEN FRUIT A man named Melon saw a girl, A Peach, who made his headpiece whirl She had that bright Strawberry hair

And that's wha-t got him then and there.

Love's Currants started working- so Hewas electrified, you know.

“You are the Apple of my eye." l-Ie said. “Come, Darling, let us fly.

We'll go to parson Grave's house where He'll marry us. We'll be a Pear;

I'll work for you to beat the hand At my old dad's Banana stand!"

Her heartless answer struck him dumb:

"I Cantaloup-Pm Mrs. Plural"

Chargrined, he fell down on the spot;

They rushed him Io an Apricot.

They had to Berry him one day

so Alh- goes ‘upstairs an‘ dcre she is prinking herself belb’ a mirrow. ‘Irene,’ Ah says, ‘where is mali meals?" ‘Go on. man.’ she says. ‘Ah ain't got no time for you, Ahhs a member o!‘ a lodge now.’ Jerlge. dis made me sore and Ah asked hBl‘ again i'o‘ my victuals and she

W. VIIISTOII 14 Gienside Reed South Orange. llewlereey, ILSJ.

lsaid, ‘l1 you's a eagle, den ﬂy."

wonxmo

Dr. Ramsay: lakes e let oftime patch eeeee to attend to."

"I wish you two wouldn't always be fighting. lug you up and I've no end of enter eerleue

sold, ‘All done toi’ you once Ah ain't got no time to ibodder wid you, Ah belongs to de Ladies Artillery ob de Cullud Eagles.’ Jedge, Ah got so mad dat Ah picked her right up and threw her out d9 window and

bar

"A 511°"- 5114 8 0f pearlsaml mBecouso he grieved and

passed

Submits for Castor 03L Paregoric, n,“

natural also; swam b“?! Iigueﬁtre‘ or - ~

Th

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PHOTOGRAPH

BY

BAYER

163 Great George Bfreat

‘aINQ " WHEN

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TO LISTEN

OME- FOR YOU

OVERTINE

-Fmm‘ London Opinion.

It

CABTINQ . "ii-b Runs WILL sPEkK.

MORE THE ‘sruowr OF‘ Tue: zuRoPiEAN ilTuATioN i5 FAR NOR: React-urea

AND FURTHER"