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human beard...

The Castro - Want to look like everyone’s favorite Cuban base- ball player/dictator? Now you can! (Note: the Camo hat is es- sential)

The “I don’t give a shit.” - Much like “The Castro”, only with two hours sleep and no hat. Generally found on the homeless and University professors.

The Playoffs - He shoots, he scores! Pretty much the same as the “I Don’t Give a Shit” and “The Castro,” only during hockey playoffs. (Touque and sweatpants required.)

The Goté - Anew favorite for men of all ages. good for keeping you lips and chin warm but the cheek kissable. popular with serial killers.

The Round-About - This bad boy deserves a double take. Not quite a full beard... a step up from the “Theory of a Deadman.” Not very common, but often envied.

The Sassy Frenchman - C’est beau! Probably the grossest thing you can voluntarily put on your face. Oui oui!

The “T try to grow facial hair to be cool like all the other guys but this is all I got.” - Enough said.

The Tom Selleck - Also known as “The State Trooper.” Works best with a red sports car-and:a hairy chest.”

The Theory of a Deadman - Inspired by what is possibly the greatest-ever Canadian band. This stash will drive all the ladies wild.