CD: The Bathroom Wall Artist: Jimmy Fallon Label: SKG Music

Jimmy Fallon is hilarious. Jimmy Fallon's new CD "The Bathroom Wali" is not hilarious. Fallon's attempt at song-writ- ing leaves much to be desired. His lyrics are weak and don't provide the listener with the laugh-out-loud hooks that they may be expecting. Fallon's songs are moderately boring, at best, and while the stand-up comedy that is included on the album is quite funny, there is simply not enough of it to make up for the disappointing songs. Highpoints on the CD include a stand-up bit entitled "Troll Doll Celebrities" and the very pleasing finale "Hammertime". Both sections are sure to make you laugh and add some flavour to the otherwise uninspir- ing disc. Serious fans of Saturday Night Live and of Jimmy Fallon may enjoy this CD; however, the average listener is not going to find it as entertaining.

by Matt STEWART

CD: If it was you Artists: Tegan and Sara Label: Superclose

This dual-action team is strong like bull. They go grunge-alterna-rock and raw-heavy-pop. Their influences range from Cobain to Holly MeNarland to Sarah Sloan to the Odds. Listen to this album and you'll hear a different sound coming out of every tune. These twin 22-year-olds have grown into their own since their first album The Business of Art, produced in 2000, which was pretty folksy. Folksy they are no more. The lyrics may come across as somewhat unin- spired, but they still have a certain depth that rings through. The music outshines their words, which is another reason the lyrics don't seem up to par. These girls have written catchy tunes

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Choice Cuts Reviews of Everything

that you would want stuck in your head. I'd list my faves, but then I'd end up naming almost every song.

by Mariéve MacGREGOR

Book: Paddy Clarke Ha Ha Ha Author: Roddy Doyle

The most obvious unique char- acteristic of Paddy Clarke Ha Ha Ha is it's told from the point of view of a ten-year-old. There are no chapters and the ideas flow from one topic to the next sporadically, changing out of the blue, just like the mind of a young boy. The story focuses on Patrick Clarke, who is growing up in a city suburb in Ireland. He tells stories of adventure, playing with his friends and of the

. trouble they love to get into. They

especially savour starting fires or thinking up new ways to torture each other. But, in the middle of all this, Paddy, as he's called by his friends, and his little brother deal with escalat- ing verbal and sometimes physical vio- lence between their parents. It's inter- esting to see spousal abuse told from the point of view of the child. Doyle is clear and convincing when describing Paddy's reaction to the fighting. Paddy's parents assume their actions aren't known to their children, but the kids do pick up on so many signals. Some of the more effective scenes are between Paddy and his brother when they're lying in bed at night, trying to ignore what's going on elsewhere in the house.

Paddy worships a particular classmate of his, who appears to have it all in Paddy's opinion. He follows him around and wishes to be his friend and smoke cigarettes just like he does. By having it all, this child keeps to himself and seems unaffected by the goings on around him. This is what Paddy wants more than anything. He

' doesn't want to feel pain or emotion.

He wants more than anything to be unaffected by the activities in his own home.

The story is told incredibly well. Doyle is a great writer (some of his books are also great movies) who knows how to draw the reader into the world he creates. He has taken a very serious topic and made it at times lighthearted, funny and sad. It's every- thing you need to be entertained.

by Tara STEWART-STANLEY

The Thong

Yes. I'm reviewing the thong, I think it's about time someone did, and yes, that someone just happens to be me. I'm reviewing the thong, and I just happen to be a male.

Does a string up your asshole feel good? No, thongs are not comfort- able. Then why wear a thong? Because it gets rid of that mean panty line; when someone looks at your ass, it'll be sleek and sexy - sorry, yeah, that's obvious isn't it? What I mean is that there'll be no apparent panty-line, it'll look like you're not wearing anything else other than your pants, and this can make you feel sexy.

My question is this; if you want not to have panty-lines, if you like to feel sexy, and if thongs are uncomfortable, why wear anything under your pants at all? Why not go all natural and free? No panty-line, no - uncomfortability, and damn sexy.

by Brad DIEGHAN

Artist: Daniel Bedingfield CD: Gotta Get Thru This

After listening to the 12 tracks on the short CD from British singer Daniel Bedingfield, I haven't decided if his sound reminds me more of the New Kids on the Block, the Backstreet Boys or Boyz II Men.

Listening to this album inter- ests me enough to consider future music from Bedingfield once he hones his personal sound, but. when it comes

to taking or leaving Gotta Get Thru This, I'd have to go with the leave it option, especially when I think about choosing what I will spend $20 on.

Maybe if I were listening to Gotta Get Thru This in a car with six- by-nine speakers, the bass would change things; this reviewer listened to the album via computer speakers so she was left to judge the songs on mer- its other than by how much it will make your car rattle.

The namesake of this album, Gotta Get Thru This, isn't appealing - again, visions of the New Kids on the Block fly into my mind - but there good tracks.

I Can't Read You is a catchy tune, not slathered with a dance beat like the rest of them. If the whole CD was as good as this sole song, this review would've been favourable.

But it's not.

Overall, the beat is a Band-Aid solution to tracks that just aren't the kind you'll hear on radio and hum five minutes later. When you consider the artist hasn't even hit his twenty-third birthday yet, his work his good, just not great. He needs to walk a little further down the art road.

Someday this artist will pro- duce a decent album - it's just not this one.

by Julie VEINOT

CD: Eve-olution Artist: Eve Label: Ruff Ryder Records

Driving. Typing. Studying. Partying. Talking. Sleeping. Spacing- out. Exercising. Dancing. Wigging-out. Playing. Shagging. Thinking. Doodling. Twiddling. Jamming. Running. Screaming. Eating. Grooving. There ain't nuttin’ yo can't do while diggin’ this work of love. It flows. It's tight. It's smooth. It's Eve.

by Mariéve MacGREGOR

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