INTRODUCING SPECTACULAR

Kent J. Bruyneel and Matthew Dorrell

Maybe, to start, we should introduce people to the issue-theme, of this a themed-issue.

I’m thinking maybe this wasn’t the best time of year-you know? We would have been better off printing phone bills or exam schedules.

Suicide notes. That sort of thing.

Maybe what we should do is produce a list for our readership to use as a guide, a ref- erence-something to keep them going though the dark road ahead.

Agreed:

1. Read attentively.

2. Pay attention to detail.

3. Don’t get lost in meaning.

4. Smoke ’em if you got ’em.

5. The startling beauty of newts. 6. Form enhances content:

7. Like gravy.

8. There are >20 poems.

9. We hope you enjoy >58%

10. "Smoke motherfuckin’ weed ’til your eyes bleed."

I think that was helpful. Thinking about it, I put so much time into this spectacular. I had to-write-aH-the-peems write all the poems, and then I had to desing dee design them all, lay them all out, and to top it off I had to edit them all. I should have gotten someone to help me.

You lead a tough life, you egomaniacal fraud. Fy Try telling the truth.

Okay, here:

THE CADRE POETRY SPECTACULAR

EDITOR: KENT J. BRUYNEEL

ALSO, SOME PEOPLE WHO BROUGHT ME FOOD DURING THE PROCESS: David Anderson, Jessica Beebe, Lesley-anne Bourne, Becky Burhoe, Jonah Campbell, Jeff Coll, Brad Deighan, Matthew Dorrell, Megan Dorrell, Stephanie Douglas, Dennis Ellsworth, Rob Fletcher, Christine Gordon, Charles Gregory, Richard Lemm, Mare MacDonald, Michael MacDonald, Brent Maclaine, A. Maclaren, John Mackenzie, Stephan MacLeod, Andrew MacPhee, David Moses, Sarah Murphy, Natalie Pendergast, Andrea Steele

Ha ha. I ll do the masthead then. For real:

THE CADRE POETRY SPECTACULAR

Eprrors: Kent Bruyneel, Matthew Dorrell

DESIGNERS: Kent Bruyneel, Jonah Campbell, Jeff Coll, Matthew Dorrell, Mike Lecky, Stephan MacLeod, Geoff and Melda Gibson

CONTRIBUTERS: David Anderson, Jessica Beebe, Lesley-anne Bourne, Kent Bruyneel, Becky Burhoe, Jonah Campbell, Jeff Coll, Brad Deighan, Matthew Dorrell, Megan Dorrell, Stephanie Douglas, Dennis Ellsworth, Rob Fletcher, Christine Gordon, Charles Gregory, Richard Lemm, Marc MacDonald, Michael MacDonald, Brent MacLaine, A. Maclaren, John Mackenzie, Stephan MacLeod, Andrew MacPhee, David Moses, Sarah Murphy, Natalie Pendergast, Andrea Steele

Yeah, those good people. This must be the Cadre’s longest masthead in your time as Editor.

It's been a long strange two years.

Like the guy on the island, except your hair didn’t get real long.

You insensitive bastard. Aren't we supposed to be introducing this issue? It is not going very well so far. I blame you primarily.

It’s just that Jeff is eating packages of condi-

ments-cheese whiz, peanut butter, marmalade, strawberry jam. It’s distracting.

No wonder he's built like a badly packed © duffel bag.

The issue is excellent. It is by far the best thing I have done recently.

He's slapping his lips like a dolphin wacked out on horse tranx. Yeah, I like this issue too. Jeff is making me sick eran! I can barely continue.

This call and answer shit is getting tired.

I am open to suggestions: perhaps we could discuss the nature of this student newspa- per-its recent past and the direction it is going. You are going to be Editor next year, right?

To my surprise. And delight. I must mention the delight. And the good people. All those good people. eat

The people here are all extremely talented and/or interesting. Jeff, Sarah, Steph, Marc, Ryan, James, Stephanie, Jonah, Jessica, Mike, Natalie, Paul, everyone I am forgetting. All of them. I have love for the people here. Real genuine respect. Close to love. Love.

Brotherly and sisterly love. Let’s be clear. I have a fear of lawyers and lawsuits. I’m scared of Ryan too. Sometimes he hits me. . .

When I was young, many years ago, if you wanted to tell someone you cared about them, you kicked them in the shins. Maybe it is just an extrapolation of that kind of behaviour.

You're an asshole and this chair is uncomfort- able. Yeah, make fun of spelling over my shoulder. That's helpful. The back and forth method of writing is now dead. I’m writing your parts too.