-9

_ certain. What a wretched mistake.

HASZARIYS GAZETTE, SEPTEMBER 2233

THE IAN WITH THE CARP!!!‘-BAG.

It was only a mistake, an awkward mis- take, too, for a bachelor, to get hold of the wrong carpet-bag on a steamboat just at bed-time. And Jllll fancy how you would have felt if it had been you, and if you had got all ready for your night-cap and robe dc nail, and then found that instead of your own carpet-bag you had laid violent hands upon one full of-——full of baby-clothes. That would be bad. Changing baggage with a man going south, while your route lay exactly north, is bad enough, but nothing compared to such a chan e as we have hinted at, when the poor fe low was left without a change unless he went back to ﬁrst principles.

We were travelling lately with a crowd

on a steamboat, and had a room in partner--~

ship with a publisher of a Magazine that is printed not a thousand miles from The Knickerbocker otlice. and a very good fellow he is too, and very fond of printing jokes- upon other folks.

There was, as usual when there is a crowd of folks, ti. “ right smart chance of baggage,” in the care of which it was every one for himself, and some other power for the rest ofthem.

“ I've taken care,” said our friend, “to secure my carpet-bag,” as he deposited one of those smooth black leather sacks that by some misnomer are called carpet-bags, in our stateroom, before any general scramble took place among the baggage. “ I'm all right now for sleeping.”

’ Till bed time he rested easy--and then well, and then—being a modest man he put out the light before he made the last change, and took tip his carpet-bag to get his night clothes. For a long time we could see by ditn light from the cabin that ho was trying to penetrate the interior, but the lock rc- sisted liis ellorts more than all the safes in the Crystal Palace did the great lock-pick- ing Hobbs. He held up the bag and look- ed nt it all over and soliquized: “It looks like mine—it is just the size and shape and color, and I took it from the very spot where I put mine, but it an’t mine, that is VVhat shall I do .7”

“ Call the waiter,” we suggested.

" I can’t, I’m undressed; confound it.”

" It seems already confounded. You can sleep in your shirt and perhaps you'll be all right in the morning.”

“ No I shan’t—l haven’t a clean shirt in the world and no possible chance to get one —no razor—”

“ Glad of it; wish every man was just so —can lend you a shirt if you don't find yours. and—” -

“ Yes, yes, but I believe this bag be- longs to some woman, and there’ll be the deuce to pay.”

" Then you must keep dark.”

“ So I will. Good idea that.”

To carry out that good idea be dressed himself and went down, looking for what was not to be found. Of course not. If he had got somebody’s carpet-bag that looked exactly like somebody else’s, of course somebody else had got his. And then, what if somebody else’: key ﬁtted his lock: there would be an exposition of masculine traps in a lady's cabin; and the worst of it was, they would know who owned them. Painful redicament. No help for it though, the deed) was done.

So he called the steward; the steward called the head waiter; the head waiter called the waiter at the other end of the body corporate of cabin attendants; but the only information obtained was that he had heard some woman in one oi the state-rooms —couldn't tell which—“going on like fun about her carpet-bag.”

Ah, that was it-some woman. Our bachelor friend would sooner encounter some bear than that woman--the woman whom he had robbed of her night gown. Without a shirt, was nothing——with a shift, was something. And then to think that he couldn't go ashore. No, he had got to wait, and face the foe by daylight. Heaven knows if he slept, though he said he did, and dreamed of being locked up in a carpet- bag which contained more linen ready for the; wash than poor Falstatl"s basket. Then he dreamed that he was trying to dress for breakfast, in a clean shirt without a collar, very long, and wide at the bottom.

It was a dreary night, that night upon

~ carpet-bag, his own, and he was decidedly

the sea; and morning brought no hope. What could the dreamer do? Why could get up early, and dress as be was dressed before—why should be change? the world changes, why should we?-—and get the stray carpet-bag back to the bag- gage-room, and wait coming events. All

ay he waited, but none came. There stood the carpet-bag without an owner. Finally every room was looked into by the chambermaid, and nowhere was the coun- terpart of that bag to be found. Its like was not on the boat. Terrible idea, that it had gone ashore; and here was our bache- lor friend on a three day's trip without a chance ofa clean shirt, unless such a one as he had seen in his vision ofa dream.

To help the matter on, an sceidentde- tained the boat another day. It was a very dark day. But our frind’s case was darker; ‘it was a black case—-a case of black lea- ther; but it contained a white shirt. But where was it? that was the question, not what was in it.

Finally the baggage-man was called to see ifhe could tell where the lost carpet- bag had gone ashore.

“ VVhat sort of one?”

“ Just like that-exactly.”

“ Exactly P”—“ Yes, precisely."

“ Precisely! Then that is precisely it; for there has not been nnotherlike it on the boat since we left Quebec.” E

“Impossible. I have tried and tried to: unlock it. My key don't fit the lock at all.",'

“Let me see. Same size-—sainc sliapei —that little crook in key hole, and lierc af crook to fit.” ‘ “ Yes, but it won’t go in; it is no use tol trv."

‘It is no use ever to s'ay " it is no use 0; try.” Keep trying. ‘-

5' O

Never give up. The, man took a little nail out of his pocket—3 screwed it into the hole in the key an

wound out a wad of lint and dust—clapped' the key to the lock, and pi-esto——tho lostl carpet-bug was found, and the owner was- confounded. He was the man with the carpet-bng—his own carpet-bag, that he had disowned. His night of dreams had pnst.——I‘Iis visions of shirts without collars had vanished to the spirit land. His trouble was over, and he had a clean shirt forte- morrow. He had, what he always had, a

the man the world has been looking for, “the man with the carpet-bag.” Long may it wave!

_jo

AN INGENIOUS SEAMAN.—Tllel‘8 is a story that a sailor volunteered to start from Ca- reening Bay on the ﬁrst tavourable opportu- nity, and to destroy oacli ship successively. He asserts that he is in possesion of a se- cret method by which he cnn move along he- neath the surface ofthe water and breathe as easily as if he were in a diving apparatus supplied with air by a pump, and can carry with him an explosive machine of sutlicient power to dirvo a hole through the bottom of the largest ship. The sailor gave a proof on the night of the 19th ult. that at any rate he was clever enongh to approach a ship undetected, notwithstanding a very careful guard being established to mark his coming. As a proof of still further ability he announ- ced to the officers ofher Majesty ‘a ship Lon- don that he would course in the cmoe ofthat night and chalk tip the name of the ship on her side just above the water-mark, do what they might to prevent him. The challenge was accepted, double sentries were posted and some volunteers among the oﬂicers kept a look out, but no one was observed to come near, and all on board were con- vinced that no one had come near the vessel. Davli ht however showed the letters conspi- cuously chalked on the ship's side, as the sailor had said they would be. It has been suggested that the means by which his feat wafaccomplished was an atmospheric boat, capable of being guided when sunk, beneath the surface ol the water, and supplied with a reserve ofair enough to last a given time for the_support of its adventurous owner. It is stated that he could not have swam along- side without being observed.

Cossrsutira Gsiv'rni.i.r.—A lady recent- l , in speaking of her husband, who had fkiled in the poult business, said that “ he had been heavi engaged in mercan- tile speculations in urkey, and had been

Some Yankee, writing in the New York ‘Courier 45' Enquirer, points out the great importance ‘of Newfoundland to the power possessing it. The writer says, it is the greatest nursery for seamen in the world, and that, moreover, American ships in ﬁning to Europe must run the gauntlet of

ewfoundland, and in case of a war with England, are therefore exposed to capture, as was the case in I812, when over 100 United States’ vessels were made prizes of in that vicinity. This wiseacre concludes by urging the Yankee “Fillibusters" to “ strike for the prize" while Great Britain is_now employed in other quarters. But it will be wise of them to bear in mind, that although she is at present engaged ina great war, she will, nevertheless, ﬁnd not ‘the slightest ditliculty in protecting her possessions all over the world, from the cowardly attacks of bucanneers.

Heat: Foorraturs or THE LIQUOR Trus- ric.—Tiii: Lock-up delivery, on many mornings, presents very iiielancholy feat- ures, wliicli the public ought to take much more into consideration than it does few of the wretched drunken strzigglers of the streets, those who may happen to come under the cognizance of the \/Vutchiiien and other ollicers of Police, who are thrust into the lock-tip during the night, are brought up at eleven o'clock in the light of

ay, and confronted by the autliorities. A wretched spectacle they S0lnClllllt’S make; some oftlit-iii, the poor wrecks of society, the lowest links in the chain of at ino.-‘t sad series.

They siiggcst iiinny painful thoughts;— and niiiong the rest, they rciniiid of the other end ofthe chain. \Vhat at curious exhibition would be in his \\"oi~sliip's Court, if tliosc, who had grown rich and sleek on the folly (‘l-Slltfll iniscnililcs, stootl also before the bench ofjusticc; the law of the land might not hold them accountable for the wretched i-esults,—but the law of Con- science and of the Gospel, would tint be silent; and ifevcr traders were ashamed of their iiianiil'ucttii'es, they would be. [low would, Mr. So-and-so,—aiid Squire So- and-so,--responsible and comfortable citi- zens, steady and church-going iiien! iinpor- ters, distillers and retailers,-—how would these look standing in proximity with those

next morning in all the papers of the land." He proposes that there shall be one formed in each county to make observations dail , and that these shall be transmitted tot e central otlice in Washington, which has

charge of the meteorological observations

may not strike every one, for they belon to that class ofscientitic researches, whic

those not conversant with the subject would

put down as the speculative. But that they are useful, in an important degree, there can be no doubt.

———o ACADIAN GEOLOGY AND rrs writes.

The following notice of the author of Acadian Geology we clip from the Pictou Eastern Chronicle:

J. \V. Dawson, Esq., of this place, has accepted the situation of Principal of Mac- Gill College, Montreal. This is the most extensive and best endoived institution of learning in British America, and it is a pleasing evidence ofthe estimation in which Mr. Dawson’s talents are held abroad, that he has, without his own seeking, been chosen to till this high and honorable trust. While the citizens of Pictou all rejoice at his prcfcrinent to a position where he will have eiilairged opportunities of usefulness, they deeply regret the removal, from their midst of an individual endeared to them by virtues, and still more, that his native Pro- vince could offer him no situatioti suited to his abilities and worthy of his acceptance. Mr. Dawson is at present in Scotland, where he will attend the meeting of the lh-itisli Asset-.iatioii, which meets this year in (ilasgmv, l)lll expects to come out to Haliliix by the Slf'llll1CI‘ of the ﬁrst Novem- her, when he will immediately proceed to Montreal, to enter upon the duties of his otliee. The following notice of his appoint- ment is from the Moiitrenl Transcript:

“ Tiir. .'\'t-'.W PRINCIPAL or M‘Gii.i. Cot.- i.i-:es, i\lo.\"riir.AL.-—VVe understand that John \rVillinm Dawson, Esq., of Pictou, Nova Scotin, has been elected by the Go- vernors, Principal of this Institution. In the world of science, this gentleman is well known. He is n F G. S.: :1 correspond- ing member of the Academy of Natural Sciences, Philadelpliin; iiutlior of a hand- book ofthe Geography and Natural History of Nova Scotia; and of various scientific contributions towards the improvement of

reduced by their wares to the kennel and the dungeon? This question is becoming of force, and will more and more urge itself on public consideration, with strange asso- ciation ofideas, until the hideous anomaly (to call it by a mild name) will be shamed out of vogue, and into the list ot' other obsolete cvils.——IIalifa:c ./ilhemeuin.

0 Lisur. Msunv AND THE FARM!‘.lts.— \Ve ee by the Chicago Democrat, that Lieut. Maury has issued through the Jimcrican Farmer a circular, suggest- ing to farmers a plan, whereby they ma become more familiar with the inﬂuences that surround them in the atmosphere, and from which they may derive beneﬁts to their profession, " equally important as are those which have been secured to the mari- ner by thesystein of observations so exten- sively carried out at sea under his auspices.” ieut. M. asks merely such co-operation in his plan on the land, as he has received on the sea. As an exempliﬁcation of some ofthe ﬁrst fruits ofthe system of meteoro« logical observations which he proposes for determining the course of storms, and pre- dicting when thev will be in certain locali- ties, he says that “ certain ofthe observers scattered _over all parts of the country would probably be required to make daily reports to the central otlice in Washington, as to the weather, each for his own station—say at 9 A. M. This would soon enable us to determine the laws of progress as well as the march ofthe various states of weather, such as gales, rains, snow storms and the like; so that by knowing in what part ofthe country a storm had arisen, we should- Iearning through the telegraph the direction it might take—be enabled to calculate its rate oftravel, and to predict within a few hours the time it would arrive at different places on its line of march; and knowing these, the telegraphic agency which the newspaper press of the country has esta- blished here, would, without more ado or

unfortunate."

Literature. His latest work is one upon Acadittn Geology; givin an account ofthe Geological structure an Mineral resources of Nova Scotia, and portions of the neigh- bouring Provinces of British America. These honors, high in themselves, are ac- companied with testimonials just as distin- guished. He is warmly recommended by Sir C. Lyell, one ofthe most distinguished geologits who ever visited this continent. His chief forte is Natural History, and Agricultural Chemistry—branches of na- tural science, both of them highly neces- sary in a new country, and probably more likely to be productiae of beneﬁt than over- doses of Latin and Greek.”

GOING A Fisiimo—A clergyman of a country village desired his clerk to give notice “ that there would be no service in the afternoon, as he was going to ofﬁciste for another clergyman." The clerk, as soon as the sermon was ended, rose up with all due solemnity. and called out —“ I am desired to give notice,that there will be no service this sftei-noon,as Mr. L. is going a ﬁshing with another clergyman.”

.:——o-—-—.

“ Thomas, there is too much bustle here."

“ Where, Pa!"

“ I mean there is too much noise-—yoa nus stop it.”

“ is a noise. a bustle, Pa!”

“ Yes. child."

‘- Golly gracious !—then sister Sally does wear the biggest noise you ever saw, Pa.”

A cross-grained, antiquated maiden vixen went to a Physician for advice. " Madam” said the doctor, " seems to me; it would do you good, to have a little sum and air." " Oh !—you abominable, nasty critter 1-¢ son and heir !—Oh, dear 1-oh,desr l-somebody fan me !—I shall go-olf-handle !-the outrageous brute ?—a son and lieir ! l ” The old maid vignossd, and has not been no.

further cost, make the announcement the