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Sitting in the courtroom, waiting for the verdict to be paSSed down by ' .r . the judge, I noticed the look of disdain on my social worker's face. The outcome, I felt, was not going to‘be a favourable one. .

. . .why should my social worker care anyway? In the past two years I've ' had three meetings with him - all of which took place in the _Calgary de— \tention centre. No ,one in this courtroom seems to give a damn; my par- ents didn't even come to give me support. Free show! Watch Charlene

Prowse be kept a ward of the province until she's eighteen. Don't help Keep her in that

her. Condemn her before she causes any more trouble. prison place. Iock your doors! Beware? Beware! Charlene mightsteal you blind.

I've been in a girls' detention centre for the past two years; the maj— ‘ ority of which was spent without any privileges. Themst sought and a ' most difficult privilege to achieve was classified as a 50A rating which entitled you to leave the grounds with an adult. There were few times- .when I worked myself up to a 50A, but for the majority of the time I had

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[6 9/ the rating of 30B, which entitled me to next to nothing. I was the old— \ est one in detention and I had no privileges. {jar When I talk to people, they always think I've committed some large fel— ony to have been kept in detention for two years. I have a long his- ‘ 3.3. tory of misdemeanors ranging from 'juvenile runaway' to 'break’and en— ' ter' . I haven't been in any trouble for the laSt year, but I broke out

My parents don't want me at home and my three older

of detention twice. I'm the black sheep of the

sisters are all settled into their careers. family. . r

I have few alternatives and, if I get placed in detention for another year, I'll go stark raving mad. They all tell me that my behaviour is not normal for a girl of my background and intelligence. If they think I'm deviant now, wait till they see me after another year of being insti- tutionalized. , ‘

I haven't lived at home for three years. I can hardly remember what my family's faces look like. I cry a- lot more now than I ever have.

I guess I could compare my actions to I've tried the -' you can trust me I've NOW

in people who have blown it. ' Phe Little Boy Who Cried Wolf' . V changed — bit numerous times before without actually meaning it. when I finally mean it — I haven't any believers.. ‘ _ I wonder if I stood on top of a mountain and shouted my innocence to the world, if anyone would believe me. "Hey World, I realize I've done you wrong, but please believe me. I need your help. I want to change." No, I don't think anyone would believe me. , r, I've always tried to figure out why I've done so many things wrong. I don't think I can actually blame my family. They all seemed to try and help me. There's something about society that makes people want to impress other people. The only way I could ever make any friends was to impress people. I used to steal cigarettes, make—up and jewellery and give them to my 'friends' . That's the only way I could ever get peo— , ple to notice me. ' ~ I wonder who I am. I've been masquerading in a Charade for so song ,it‘s hard to figure out. 'Ib my parents, I'm a problem. 'Ib my sisters, I'm an intrusion. To my social worker, an unnecessary complication. To my friends, I'm rowdy and a bit crazy. 'lhe most important question is left unanswered — who am I to me? I'm two years behind in my education. In St. Mary's Detention Centre

where I am now, if I don't attend classes, I'm locked up. naturally, [I now attend classes regularly. 'Ihe only thing I enjoy about school id the art classes and they're only scheduled twice a week. I don't know what I'll end up doing. I would like to live on my own, try to keep~ ~ -~ a steady job and sort out my life. ' ,_ V ~ If I try, if I try really hard, maybe I can convert into I've always wanted to be... ' ' ~ "Charlene Suzanne Prowse please come fomard. Due to the two in— stances of running away from St. Mary's Detention Centre, the court has, ‘ decided that you shall remain a ward of the Government of Alberta until you reach the full age of eighteen. If your beha’viour has not improved b y p a t by that time we shall have no other choice than to place you in a women's I turnhall

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criminal institute. You will have to work hard this next year, Charlene, ’ and prove yourself ready to re-enter the cormnmity...'Ihat is all. ..Case « A dismissed. - ». A small article was found in the Edmonton Journal two days later. 'C‘harlene Suzanne Prowse l7byear—old ward of the Alberta Government was found dead in her roan at St. Mary's Detention Centre early this morning. Causes of death are being withheld pending further investi-

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I'm trying so hard to change, but people are leary' ‘abou‘ trusw t ' ‘ b V

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