AIDS

PREVENTION:

TAKE Your PICK

entertainment, we feel it is our responsibility to publish.

Uncle Stevie’s

Cut out and Keep guide to CONTRACEPTION AND SAFE ENCOUNTERS

Realizing what actually constitutes the most common form of campus

Protection against ‘dis ease

Method Failure Rate

Embarrassment Factor

THE Bauaswinge)

(7aies_Te

The Pill

0-2% None.

Condom 3-6% Reasonable.

Diaphram (Cap) 3-12% Not a chance.

The Sponge Chancey You’re joking.

Intra-Uterine Device 2-4% Forget it.

(1UD)

\

Don’t make me laugh.

Spermicide (Foams,| 10-14%

jellies, creams)

No way.

Coitus Interruptus 10-40%

(Watch it) Uh uh.

Rhythm Method 30-50%

High Excellent.

Celebacy

Fairly low. Potential embarrassment when staying with relatives and finding a good place to hide ’em. Can be a problem for those who can’t use a calendar.

High. Too many silly names for it. If using this method, one should learn good conversation skills to

. bridge the gap of the 15

minute gymnastics it takes to put one on. Available in’ a variety of shapes and colors, all which look equally as foolish.

High. When not in use ©

tends to fall out in Cafeteria or Pit. When in use likely to fall-out of body. Spring has a habit of suddenly cata- pulting the thing across the room.

Can be embarrassing if your partner recognizes it as something he washes the car with.

Medium. Possibility of picking up CB messages, space shuttle transmissions, etc. during the event.

High. Very Messy. Problems may arise if con- tact glue or hair mousse are mistaken for it.

Quite high afterwards if you know the person doing your laundry.

High. eral months afterwards when asked to pay child mainte-

nance. High. Friends will laugh.

Chance of losing control after a few weeks.

Especially sev-

AOE

The sage says ...

- People always. remem-

“ber the last mistake you

make. ; - He who hesitates is probably smart.

- The one who does the least work always gets the

‘most credit.’

- Whatever happens, be- have like you meant it to happen.

- Experience is some- thing you don’t get until just after you need it the most.

- Confidence is the feel- ing you get just before you fully understand the prob- lem.

- No job is so simple that it can’t get screwed up.

- A committee is a group of people doing the work of one person.

- A conclusion is what you’ve come to when you reach the point where you can’t think anymore.

- Whenever you don’t understand what you’re do- ing; remember to always do it neatly.

- The secret to a suc-

cessful presentation is sincer- ity. Once you fake sincerity you’ve got it made.

- Ifit weren’t for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.

- If anything can go

wrong it will. :

_- As soon as you meniion something ... 2

jf its good, it goes away. :

if its bad, it happens.

- Anything is possible if you don’t now what you are talking about.

- It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

- A closed mouth gathers no foot.

FRIENDS WANTED.

Are you a young, attractive male looking for companionship? There are 60 young, intelligent, witty. handsome, interesting, sexy young Marianettes who want to be your closest friends. We are all good buddies but we've been together too much in every. - ’ way over the year and are _ looking for fresh excitement. Send a nude photo and re- ‘sume to “Biffy”, Marian Hall, Charlottetown. Or apply in person. “The Guys”.

. + Negative expectations yeild negative results, while positive expectations yeild negative results. : - Once you open a cam of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a bigger. can.

- The other line always

- moves faster. |

- An oblect will fall so that it will do the most damage.

- The chance of the bread falling with the butter side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

- If facts do not conform to the theory they must be disposed of. i

- When in doubt, mum- ble.

- A man with one watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure.

- Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.

- Cleanliness is next to impossible in the kitchen.

- Virtue is its own pun-— ishment.

- If the shoe fits, its ugly. ”

- HANDY GUIDE TO MODERN SCIENCE...

af its green or it ‘wrig- gles, its biology.

«if its stinks, its chem- istry.

af it doesn’t work, its physics.

- In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.

- No matter where you go, there you are...

'. When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.

- For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism. sre

Just ask for

Aids. carriers need not apply.