. ‘ lifig‘éis- .1 ‘~'
By David E. Dickie
There will be an Informa- tion Session on recruitment for the Canadian Armed Forces by Captain Currie. This session will take place in Main 01 on Tuesday, Feb- ruary 5th, I985 at 7:00 p.m.
An Information night’ on careers with the Correctional Services of Canada will be held on Wednesday, Feb- ruary 27th at 7:00 p.m., in the Robertson Lecture Theatre.
There will 'be a KATI- MAVIK PRESENTATION in Room 01 on Monday, Feb. llth, 1985 at 4:00 p.m.
Application Forms are available at this office for Tour Guides with Abeweit Tours (bilingual preferred).
Ice Guides — Atlantic
Marine Wildlife Tours Ltd. requires ice guides to conduct tourists to the harp seals on 'the pack ice of the Gulf of St. Lawrence during the month of March. If inte- rested, please contact this office for further informa- tion.
Tour Guides are also re- quired to conduct groups to points of interest in and around Charlottetown and Summerside during this period.» : ~ * . '53Iriifo‘smationéjtseminarslxon various aspects of ithe‘ job hunt will be held again this semester. Individual assist- ance with your job hunt can also be arranged by appoint- ment.
‘ Dimwi/tin Under/and
ByJim Lai
Sly DimWilt woke up. He found himself lying on the shore of an underground river, probably the River of Knowledge. The glOsing moss was all over the place. ‘ >
“Get ’up, Twerp,” a voice called. Sly hoped. it wasn’t yet another human being. Nearly
being drowned in the River of
Knowledge does strange things to a person’s mind.-
“The‘ name’s Sly Dimwilt,” Sly 'replied, still flat on the ground.
“So what? You look like a Twerp to me.” ' '
Sly dragged himself to his feet and turned tolook at the source of the voice. It was as he feared, another human being. Sly was sick and tired of having to deal with people. At least this one was repulsive, physically. “Where am I?” Sly asked the woman.
“Where are you from?” she asked. “Everyone knows this is the Land of Excuses. I hope you’re not one of them.” There was not the slightest hint of humor in her voiceng
“Thermf'i‘ “Sly “was totally puzzled,,a§g§na1“ :
“TheAre you sure nothing’s. wrong with your
bfi >- . .,
/
m by
‘ ROIGS
Presently I am planning on holding sessons on February 12th and‘ 14th. Topics will include: Traditional and Non-Traditional Approaches — held on Feb. 12th; and Tying It All Together (what, where, and how do I get the best job for me?) — held on Feb. 14th.
These seminars will be in ROom 01 of the Main Build- ing at 1:00 p.m. and 7:00 p.m. on the above dates.
For interested graduates —
m OF comma “Pig;'\
“I don’t know. What’s an Excuse?” ,
“A person who does nothing all day long except feed off the work of others. An Excuse for a human being, you could say.”
“Wonderful.” Things were looking brighter every second, alright. Sly wondered how detestable an Excuse would be to him. 7
“I can’t stay‘ here all day, Twerp. Any last requests?” “Yeah. How do I get out of here?” '
“I don’t know. I’m still look- ing for an exit.”
“Great. I’ll help.” Just after he said that, Sly wondered what was wrong with his brain. He had never helped anyone in his life and couldn’t see why he was starting now.
As SLy questioned his sudden helpfulness, they began to search for an exit from the Land of Excuses. Sly hoped that the River of Knowledge wasn’t the only way out.
Suddenly they were con- fronted by seVeral Excuses. They looked well fed and were
slightly(?) overweight. (Can a'
grape be overweight, or just bloated?)
“Help me,” an Excuse
’ begged. “I am .too weak to
gather food.” > ’
I
'rhé‘nrcem’re
Maritime Life is currently recruiting for the 1985 actuarial program (perma- nent and summer). An Actuarial Aptitude Battery is scheduled for Friday, Feb.
.8th at 2:00 p.m. in Room 01
Main Building. Please advise our office, if interested.
Mr. Dickie was also the author of the article entitled “Steps to Getting Jobs” on page 11 of last week’s Gem. We apologize for not creditting him at the time.
Graphic! She-i
“You can walk. Help your- self,” Sly casually remarked. Helping more than one other person was unthinkable. He felt good as he refused. He was his good old egocentric self again.
“Have you no mercy?” another Excuse pleaded. This one had the body of a pro- fessional weightlifter.
“Probably not,” mused Sly.
“Twerp, do you think we should help?” asked the woman. “I mean, we should at least be humane.”
“Definitely not,” Sly replied. “If they can’t help themselves, let them starve.”
“You’re no better, Twerp.”
“I never claimed to be. Now, let’a find that exit. ”
Leaving the pathetic Excuses behind, they found the exit standing right in- front of them. It was yet another tunnel entrance, probably leading to yet another maze of tunnels.
Sly suddenly rationalized his reason for helping the woman. He was just using her to improve his chances for getting out of this hellhole of a place alive and into
the Outside World. His helping
her was just a side effect, that was all.
He sighed in relief, his mind at peace in the fact that he was still
unaffected by the "plight of
, ., I! It
IN THE HIGH TENSION WORLD OF INTERNATIONAL FINANCE A MAN SOMETIMES DOES THINGS HE WOULD NOT NORMALLY DO.
THIS IS THE STORY OF SUCH A MAN
THE WORLD BANK PRODUCTIONS
IN CO-OPERATION WITH CAN-CON
“CONFESSIONS OF AN IMF LOAN OFFICER”
STARRING
ROBERT REDFORD PIA ZADORA
WITH SPECIAL GUEST APPEARANCES BY THE LEADERS OF VARIOUS THIRD WORLD NATIONS AS “THE SCROUNGERS” , DON'T MISS THIS SHOCKING TALE OF COR- RUPTION, DECADENCE AND PERVERSION IN A WORLD WHERE BILLIONS ARE LOANED AND LOST EACH DAY ' RATED — ENGULFING — (MORE INTEREST— E ING THAN STAYING HOME AND READING PLATO'S “REPUBLIC”, BUT NOT AS MUCH FUN AS STEAL- ING A SHOPPING CART FROM K-MART)
COMING DURING THE NEXT FISCAL YEAR TO A THEATRE NEAR YOU
THIS WEEK AT
others. What reason did he have to care?
His line of thought was broken, for the Excuses that they had left behind apparently had found enough determination to get revenge. They were running toward Sly and the woman as a mob, their mouths filled with words of violence, their eyes seething with hate.
Sly panicked and ran into the tunnels and was soon lost in the maze. The woman followed a different path and was lost to view. Sly didn’t bother to find her.
After much running, he evaded the Excuses. Feeling a sense of loss, but not knowing why, Sly began to search for yet another exit.
(To be continued, as always.)
MONDAY — STUDENT NIGHT Happy hour all NIGHT LONG
WEDNESDAY — CIMN LIVE 9-12 p.m.
THURSDAY — “BUCK-A-ROO” Night *8:00-9:00 pm* FRIDAY — Happy hour 4 pm-7 pm‘
FREE CHILI CONN ZATT on the piano 9:30-12:30
SATURDAY — 9:30-12:30 pm CONN ZATT ON THE PIANO
MOVIES DAILY 2, 4, 6 pm
FREE HOT POPCORN
“COMING SOON” — CIMN LIVE ON WEDNESDAYS — “PLAY FOR BEEF” Every SAT.2PM Beginning FEB. 9
The Kirkwood Motor Hotel 892-4206