Prospective Courses for Summer Session:

Philosophy 245 Hippies in the 90’s

This course investigates the philosophies of university students who listen to Phish, Steely |

Dan, and The Dave Matthews Band. Why are they attracted to these indulgent bands? Why VIGOR and PEP

don’t they bathe? new ack in 20 days!

PREREQUISITE: 12 hours ofhackey sack, anda velvet painting. your money SO’ ao

THRILL TO REN

Economics 103 Introduction to Slave Labour The Cartre sevdent oe a pte al

For business students who value money over human lives, this course offers insight into nature (alli, Wyo suslent giper oo blota ing te

acquiring migrant workers, setting up factories overseas, and avoiding any public backlash Cidiaideneded a er ren ral umsh, chock of money Orde today fer pour

through ad campaigns. wooly, wn! pesipold, or order 2.0.0, plus pestegs PREREQUISITE: diregard for the sanctity ofhuman life. ee

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Religious Studies 349 Satan and Heavy Metal Music

This course examines contemporary heavy metal artists and their associations with the Lord of Darkness. We will also look at theories that link early rock and roll music to Satanism. The evolution of blues music to glam rock to metal is a twisted road paved with sin and debauchery.

PREREQUISITE: a haircut.

Biology 429 Genetic Engineering

This course examines cloning and the DNA replication ina laboratory. After studying the film, Multiplicity,students will clone Michael Keaton. There are two exams, but they are the exact same.

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COMING SOON STUDENT UNION ELECTIONS

Chemistry 280 Flubber This course introduces the groundbreaking discovery of Flubber. It’s not fluffy, it’s not rubber, it’s flubber. Taught by the absent-minded professor himself.

Computer Science 334 Cyber-Smut

This course introduces pornography on the Internet. Topics include: members-only sites, saving jpgs, spotting fake, nude celebrity photos, typing with one hand. PREREQUISITE: Must be over 18 and have a credit card.

NOMINATIONS OPEN: Psychology 212 Pavlov’s Doggs FEBRUARY 14 Using the basics of classical conditioning, students will perform classical conditioning experiments on gangsta rappers. Drive-by shootings, the theory and practice of the pimp- NOMINATIONS slap and the correct way to hold a “40” will all be discussed. Malt liquor and hoes will be CLOSE: FEBRUARY 18 provided. PREREQUISITE: Must be straight outta first-year. If interested call :The Registrar’s Office, and ask for “Killer.” ADVANCED POLES: Cassavetes money by acting(he was —_in his movies. His best film is MARCH 6-47 Continued from page 19 = Faron eee in A Woman Under The Influ- REGULAR POLES: osemary S baby, an ence (1974), which starred een apart after oe reoutt of — was one of The Dirty Peter Falk, and Cassavetes’ MARCH 8 &9 eon = “i ae Dozen), and using it to wife, Gena Rowlands. These FOR MORE eee fi produce films very much two actors appeared in many occurred with hisnext film, similarto Shadows. of Cassavetes's films, along INFORMATION wines ee ot rany His years in Holly- with other accomplished Garland Stine Site. After wood, however, found him character actors such as DROP BY THE this, he retumed to his more high-calibre acting Seymour Cassel and Ben

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