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THE DAILY EXAMINE

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Terms Four Dollars per Year,

VOL 37 A QUEER NEWSPAPER

THE OSTRICH OF CORNWALL ANDO ITS ECCENTRIC PUBLISHER.

A denrnal That Exists In Optimism and

Devotion to » “oseate Cause—The Paper

Gratuitously Distributed, but It and the

Editor Are Sustained by Donations,

In the heart of Cornwall there is pub-

+ hewspaper perhaps the

Senate Read,

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tis! 1 and ost | culiar in all the world. This is Fhe O } nd if the news of the day, fe murders, crimes a { sensations should | shock } rd nervous system Eho h ist very paper for you to | read | To begin with, this sincular Cornish jour is J r i on a delightful pale | rosé colored pape It has ® great and ever

gaining circulation. Throughout Corn-

gall you see it everywhere. From Plym- guth to Land’s End genial old squires | and parsons, merry cyed maids, spectacled | ederty ladies, young bloods in cricket fannels or hunting breeches, farmers,

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fishermen and laborers may be seen peace- fully perusing these rose hued pages. And every one can see that the faces of Ostrich seaders possess a settled look of placidity, | just as if nothing in the world could dis- | gurb them.

“Yes,’’ said the proprietor of a Penzance hotel, “The Ostrich is a wonderful paper. It settles the nerves and brings back health and happiness. All people coming

‘from the large towns seeking rest should read it. It is a boon for the nervons.’’

One opens The Ostrich, and the first thing noticeable is that certain words in the text are printed in large, heavy type; words like happy, good, 4, saved, success, health, peace, beautiful, amiable—all the

are crowded with them, so that they give the impression of being a kind of op- timist chart, pointing out all that is good and beautiful on the earth. Short sighted people, holding the newspaper at a yard’s distance, will only be able to see these agreeable words, and besides this, in the ordinary text, all words like death, mis- fortune, sickness, pain are carefully avoid- el. In the entire paper, one column ex- cepted, not a disagreeable word is printed.

The system of the publisher is based on eo science of suggestiveness. As most people are easily influenced, the }\ rusal of

spage of this rose colored paper, with its buadreds of pleasant words, may readily bring the reader to a state of mind in which he begins distinctly to see the world through rose colored glasses.

The paper is appropriately celled The Osirich. A little picture in the middle of the heading represents this famous bird burying its heed in the sand and appar- ently feeling well content in doing so. The motto of the paper is ‘‘Even of Truth One-half Is Falsehood.”’ ‘This paper sums tp all that has happened in the world twice weekiy—in not more than six col- umns—polities, elections, accidents, art end literature. Everything is treated by The Ostrich in these columns from his special viewpoint.

The first column bears the title, “What Would 8. H. D. Say to It?’ S. H. D. stands for Sir Humphry Davy, who was born in Penzance and has a monument there. This ‘‘great Christian and chem- it," as The Ostrich calls him, the in- Yentor of the safety lamp, is the model of all human beings, the yardstick with Which everything is measured. In this tlumn one finds all sorts of news, and every item with a commentary. For in- stance: “At a banquet at Birmingham Lord Salisbury declared that the situation of the Armenians was indeed such as de- manded serious consideration (S. H. D. Would say: ‘The consideration only be- Gunes serions by Lord Salisbury’s calling itso, There may be less in the matter than one would expect’)"’ Or, “The potato

‘tle is again making himself a nuisance % our coast (not in Normandy, for there

they have no potato harvest at all this year! S. HY. ..”’

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Would Any Sane House. keeper Use Uleomargarine.

DANGER IN ANOTHER DIRECTION.

Would any sane housekeeper in Canada 4y Cleomargarine or imitation butter’ n- Mead of the tinest production of the cream *y Ordairy? We think on* Canadian wotuen are two wise to be deceived in this

B00d butver will newer be acceptable to OUr peopie, dere are, however, other deceptive eee sometimes find their way into *8; we refer to imitation and ad- Urated package dyes for home dying. or talers -ell imitations of the celebra ii ‘amond Dyes, The conrents of these ation packages carry rain aod disap- ‘tment to every user,

* few dealers, for the sake of long pro- » 8te now selling soap dyes composed of large amount of common grease te infinitestimal quentity of coloring . Such dyes, after tral, have been es Weak and ancleanly, giving du)l muddy colors, fading quickly in «ing an sunlight.

millions of thrift d i d

— y and experience 0 crndy, know. the Diamond Dyes . Oly reliable home package dyes having *tood the test of lug nian Dia kad i a are easy to use, and give brillian

'ng colors that 7 807 other make cannot be equalled

1 ANY Lite at G

OTTETOWN, P.

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sSLAND;, SATURDAY,

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NOVEMBEP

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— EURIPIDES,

“This is True Liberty, when Free Born Men, having to advise the Public, may speak frea.”-

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All our winter goods must be sold, and cash customers will find. our prices are the lowest in the city; Overcoats, Ulsters, Caps, Fur Coats, Fur Caps, Robes, T weeds, Kivery article in our ready to to wear departments

Flannels, Yarns.

every article in o gains may be expected; come all.

ur stores, will be sold at alow price to clear. Bar-

McKay Woolen Company

fhe Big Stere—Bargain Corner,

—_ —-—————

zZne secona column 1s called ‘'The De- mented of Tomorrow.’’ In it all impor- tant political news is commented upon and corrected, for the motto of the paper “Even of Truth One-half Is Falsehood,”’ and most of the corrections of The Ostrich are sound. Lesides, if he makes a mis- take, i¢ does not matter. His aim is reached at all events, for news that bears the heading ‘‘ Demented’’ is doubted and has lost its exciting quality.

Still more important is the third col- umn, ‘‘How Does This Concern Me?’’ In it one finds the greatest wisdom of The Ostrich. It contajus all the news from foreign countries, and the reader general- ly sympathizes in unconcern with the pub- lisher, for what is it to him whether Pres- ident Morales or Immorales reigns on the La Plata river or whether Stambuloff has been sentenced by unjust judges or just assassins, or vice versa? That should all be of no consequence to him if he cares for his nerves.

The other columns are called ‘‘ Nothing Ie Eaten as Hot as ——,’’ ‘‘And If So?”’ and ‘‘We Do Not Believe In It.’’

This last one is very important, as it contains all terrible accidents, shipwrecks, earthquakes, famine, and so forth. The Ostrich does not believe in such things.

The man whe has invented this peculiar newspaper is John Gillis. For several years he was a schoolteacher, published some hlets, and then became a jour- nalist. studied the people of London and Bristol and gradually formed his opinion of what would be appropriate for their health, doing it from purely human- itarlan principles, for he is now crazy enough to digtribute his paper gratuitous- ly. The hotel keepers and other interested readers pay him whatever they like for it. His subscribers have built him a beautiful Mttle cottage on Tilcotts Head, all over- grown with red fuchsias and with window panes shining like the lanterns of a beacon. It is called ‘‘The Ostrich cottage.’’

Among the subscribers are Gladstone, the of Teck and Sir Arthur Sul- livah. .

With one assistant Mr. Gillis makes up the whole paper. He is a familiar figure all through Cornwall, is well liked, and has his lodging and board everywhere free. He is over 60, his face scrupulously shav- en, his hair in short, gray curls. He has peering, light gray eyes, and a merry smile around the corners of bis mouth.—New York Sun.

A Little Learning.

The Cleveland Plain Dealer tells of a colored man who noticed a board displayed in front of a building in course of crection. It bore these words: ‘Keep Away. Dan- ger!’ The colored man walked up close to the board and traced the letters with his finger. His lips moved as if he were spelling out the words. Before he had t_nished the ‘keep away”’ a brick fel) from an upper story and struck him squarely on the head, Without even looking up he backed across the sidewalk and examined the big gash in his hat. As he smoothed it down he sadly remarked, ‘‘ Dat’s one o’ eo drawbacks to # limerted edercation |”’

Read our ad. for useful shopping hints.

Moore & MeLecd.

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| MEN AND WOMEN

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Should Remember that}

Paine’s Celery Com- pound Make Peo-

ple Well.

Prompt and Grand Resuit Whea the Wonderful

Medicine is Used.

ee

A Uarvelious Cure After the Doctor Failed in the Case

J: should not be necessary to daily remind wen and women who realize that they are broken down in health the urgent need of using Paine’s Celery Compound to restor2 lost nerve force and to purify the blood.

Some of the first and most cheering re- sults noticed after Paine’s Celery Com- pound has been used for a sbort tims, is & regularity of the bowls, a better appetite, sound sleep and excellent digestion. The nerves and tissues are richly fed by new, fresh blood, and a] forms of mental depression, laseitude, dizzy spells and ringing sounds in the ears are banished.

Paine’s Celery Compound cannot be judged by the standard of any ordinary medicine, sareaparilla, bitters, nerve ton'c or pills. Paine’s Celery Con pound, isa great modern scientific discovery, and stands far ahead of all other med.cal preperations. Paine’s {Celery Compoun ! succeeds and triumphs when all other medicines fail; its grand miesion ie “:nak—~ ing people well.”

Mr. J. Irvine, Heckstone, Ont., says

“[hree years agoI bad a severe attack of “La Grippe,” which left me in a weak: and very debilicated condition. The uext autumn I had another attack which left

me in a very bad state. My healt was pearly wrecked; I had no strength, and felt tired all the time. I was #0 weak

that my legs would not support my body* aud I have often fallen to the ground when trying to attend to my work both iu the field and in my baru, and would be compelled to lie wherever I had falien until I could muster safficient strength to rise.

“My appetite was all gone, and when I

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wouhltry to eat in order to gain strength I would suffer untold misery for hours, It eeemed to me tl at I was slowly starving to death.

derive avy benetit from their treatment. My friends thought I was going to die, and I verily beleive I would have died had I not tried your Paine’s Celery Compound. I bought six bottles, and can conecientious say I received more benefit from it than I ever dreamed of; it was worth more to me than one hundred dollars worth med vines from the doctors. J began to improve in health before I had finished the first bo tle and today I am completely restored to health. I can do as good a day’s wo'k as I ever could, and can now eat any kind of food without experiencing trouble after- ward, and can sleep as well as when a boy.

“T have not bad to use any of the Compound for months, which convinces me tha: the cure is permanent. I feel it my duty to let every sufferer know what Paine’s Celery Compound bas done tor me and it seems impossible for me to say all I should in its favor, My wife, who has been a sufferer for years with chronic rheumatism, was greatly benefitted by the use of your medicine. I send you this testimony unsolicited. ”

Cooking Thermometers.

Cooking thermometers are rather expen- sive—those of American manufacture cost $3.60 and imported thermometers $5—but the sale of them is increasing. They are made of porcelain and of iron, the stand- ard supporting the tube containing the mercury tnolining backward at an angle from the base, so that the marking can be easily read. The seale is marked up to 400 degrees and over, ¢#.nd the several prop- er cooking temperatures are set forth on the thermometers as follows: Correct heat for roasts in ovens: Pork, 820; veal, 320; beef, 8310; mutton, 800. Correct heat for baking: Puff pastry, 840; bread, 840; pastry, 520; meat pies, 290. Cooking thermometers are wold for household use and for hotels and restaurants.

Good Reason,

Doctor (just arrived at the scene of the accident)—What on earth are you holding his nose for?

Pat (kneeling beside the victim)—So his breath won't leave his body, of course.— London Fun.

In the ninth century they began to shoe horses, but, strange to say, only fn time of frost. King William I introduced horse- shoeing into England, and six, horseshoes are on the coat of arms of the man to whom William gave vast estates for caring for his horses in this way.

CROFULA in its worst form yields to the blood cleansing power ox Hood’s Sarsaparille. Thousands of

“| tried differeni docters, but did rot |

cases have been pertectly CURED.

THE KAPFIR OFF DUTY. -

South African Mine Laborers Lead a Mo- notonous Life.

The report of a traveler fresh from the Cape gives acurious insight into one phase of labor on the Rand. It used to be the custom of the Kaftir, on receiving his sal- ary—usually $5 per weck—to sally forth and invest all his earnings in bottles of brandy. He would then return to his hu squat down and drink it like beer un he succumbed. This went on regularly among the mining staffs of all the large companies until, in order to prevent a weekly cessation of labor, the companies adopted the method of inclosing all their native employees inside a compound and shutting them in like prisoners until their time of service had elapsed.

Visitors to the compounds often take in &@ pound or so of the native coarse tobacco, for a handful ef which the Kaffirs, under stress of their deprivation of tobacco as well as liquor, will often gladly exc fine olf native bracelets and knobkerries. The native method of smoking is peculiar. After the pipe is filled several long pulls are taken and the smoke swallowed. The bow] is then taken off, the stem is inserted in a hewl of water and the water is sucked through it and swallowed also. Then c®mes the tug of war. The magn who can hold out longest without coughing is con- sidered a hero. Aftera short time the smoker will convulsively cough for 15 or 20 minutes and one can quite understand why the Kaffir is not allowed out to buy tobacco. In the case of the traveler who gives these detuils the mine manager asked him to cease bartering the vile stuff for native trinkets; otherwise the whole relay would be unfit to go down when its time came.

The Kaffir usually returns home after six months or a year at the mines and Is considered a rich man. He buys two or more wives and takes his ease while they do all the work.—Pittsburg

The dyspeptic carries a dreadful load on his back. It seems asif he were really made upof two men. One of them ambitious, brainy and energetic; the other sick, Hetless, peevish and without force. The weak man weighs the other one down. The dyspeptic may be able to do pretty good work one day, and the next day because of some little indiscretion in eating he may be able to do nothing at all. Most cases of dyspepsia start with constipation. Constipation is the cause of nine-tevths of all human sickness. Some of its symptoms are sick and bilious headache, dizziness. sour stomach, loss of appetite, foul breath, windy belchings, beartburn, pain and distress after eating. All these are indica- tive of derangements ct the liver, stomach and bowels, and allare cansed bv consti- pation. Dr. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets are the quickest, easiest and most certain cure for this conditiou, They are no’ vivlent ip action.

Send 31 cents in ona-cent stamps to World’s Dispensary Medical Association, Buffalo, N. Y., and receive Dr. Pierce’s 1008 page COMMON SENSE MEDICAL ADYISER, illustrated,

90. 1897.

NO 27

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DUELS AT ANNAPOLIS

A CUSTOM THAT CULTIVATES THE FIGHTING QUALITIES OF CADETS.

Very Few Go Through the Four Yee2rs

Without an Appearance on the Field of Honor—The Contests Strictly Governed by Kules and Referees.

Writers may write anc preachers msy preach, but the world—our world at least will take to its arms the boy who is as tnxious to fight asto play. It precicts great things of him and is willing to ke!p him along. Out of these battles come blackened eyes and bloody noses, but not ery harm. Self confidence is born of thera end the ability tomake the hand guard

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tho head. There used to be an old fcliew fn Goliad county, Tex., who expressed >is utter condemnation of a neighbor in this way: ‘‘Siaite him on one check and he'll turn the other. Sinite him on the o:hcr and he'll have you arrested,’’ Then he

spat in disgust.

It is not known that the authorities of

the Naval academy at Annapolis encour- age fighting. There is nothing in the pub- lished rules urging the cadets to follow the advice of dead Sam Randall and ‘get together’’ as often as possible. But it is certain that they do not discourage it. There are tales among the embryo admi- rals, handed down from class to class, of how the preceptors have stood afar and watched the battles through spyglasses, grunting at each well delivered blow and betting gleefully among themselves on the results. The consequence of this laxity is that the younger cadets—those in their first year—come in a very little while to believe that the powers are very friendly to a fighter and would offer active encour- agement to fighters if it were necessary— which it isn’t. This state of affairs does not conduce to study, but it does conduce to the development of muscle and the fat- tening of the fighting instinct. Not long ago a cadet took leg leave of the academy and wandered into Baltimore, where he spliced a multiplicity of mair braces.

As a result he first whipped a cab driver, then whipped a friend of the cab driver, and then whipped two policemen who had waked wp in time to see the end of the fray. He got back to the grounds badly battered, but standing up well under his canvas. The affair made some noise and persons went to Washington to obtain the cadet’s dismissal. There they met ‘‘ Fight- ing’’ Bob Evans and mistakenly detailed the circumstances, requesting his in{lu- ence. ‘‘What!’’ bellowed that vetcran. ‘*Dismiss a boy like that! Licked four men in one night? Damme, sirs, are you crazy? What in the blue —— do you think a naval officer is for? When he graduates, give him tome. Put him on my ship. I want 100 like him.”

In the matter of thumping his fellow there are certain rules governing the cacdet. They are leges non scripte, but ironclad nevertheless. The epithet ‘‘liar’’ must be resented with an instant blow. Al! !n- sults must be accounted for on the spot. The only spots exempt are the chape! and classroom. The combatants are immecdi- ately separated by any one standing near. A first year man is itted to separate seniors. Aiter that the code has play. ‘he combatants name two secondseach. These lay the matter before a member of the senior class. He fixes the place and diate of the enceunter. The place is always an open space behind the gymnasium. 1: is not turf, but is ground worn bare and hardened by many feet. It has been red- dened time aad again by the best blood in America. The time is always the «.ter- noon of some Saturday. The rules are Marquis of Queensberry—three minute rounds with a minute rest between. ‘he exception is that no gloves are wsed. Wrestling is not permitted, of course. Occasionally, however, when one oi the combatants has had two years’ training in the sparring school and the other is a newcomer, the old style of ‘‘rough sand tumble’’ fracas is allowed.

Always a senior class man is master of ceremonies, ap te court and suy;eme court in these litigations. The sec- onds are there to handle their men, )wt all points of dispute are submitted to the sen- ior. His decision is never questioned. A fight is fought out until one of the n.on is deemed incompetent by his seconds. who throw up the sponge. Then ke is bore to the hospital. The sponge never gous up until he is made fit for a cot. Woeto the warrior who cries enough or quits + hen he is able to continue, Noth is left him save to depart to civil life. His class- mates and the men in his dormitor, will not speak to him. He is ‘‘coventr ed.”’ There is no instance where these bare knuckle duels have had a fatal termina- tiog. The participants are endowed with the blessing of youth and are always in condition.

It sometimes happens that a cadet goes through his four years at Annapolis with- out an appearance on the fleld of hunor, but the occurrence is as rare as a }lack swan. The courage of such men is jooked on with gravest suspicion by their com- rades. Indeed a fight is regarded a neces- sury complement to an education and escape would seem impcessible to any man who could be made to resent an insult.

All of this does no harm. Enmitics end with theduel. It is required that this should be so. The opposing youngsters become faster friends thar ever. Is it Sir Lucius O’ Trigger who says: ‘‘It is aston- ishing how well you like a man when you have fought with him?’’ War is a profes- sion with these wards of the government. With them courage isa necessity. Each battle strengthens it. The cheeks of fond mothers at home would blanch if they knew that their darlings were pommeled, but their respected and respectable fathers would dance upon one leg and how! with delight. It is in us and it cannot be talked eut or bred out. As ‘Fighting Bob” in- quires, ‘‘What in the blue sheol are nayal eftyers for?’’—Chicago Times-Herald. ,

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