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` A IIOPELESS CASE. _ Mabel-Alter years of effort, I haveisucceeded in learning how to pronounce

"Goeihe."

'1`mn--Well, are you satisiicd now?

Mabel-No; every time I say it some body corrects me.

Take Your Choice

The hornacope of the world has been

mst by n dozen diilurent nstrologers and fstrologists, and the render can take his choice of the following predictions for 1908: _

“'l`l\em will he 24 earthquakes during the

Fear, each one attended hy great loss oi ife." ' “There won’t bl;-ian earthquake during

the entire year.” if

“There will be over 10,000 cases in the

Unitul States alone of people being struek by lightning." ~ i

“'i`l\ere wori’t be but one little thunder

storm during tlieqphr, and the only dam- age \vill be one onli killed."

“Look out for Cpideinics. There will

he more anmllpox than ever known be- fore. Men in high places will he stricken down.”

“The year 1008 will be an unusually

healthy one, and half the doctors can take

a vacation. A few men in high places

will be sent to Sing Sing or elsewhere" but we look for that."

"It will be a great year for cyclones.

'l`l_ie_loss of life and property will be fright- fu .’

“You needn't look for anything beyond

gentle zephyrs the whole year through."

“The hard times will grow harder, and

towards the last of the year Gould and Vanderbilt will he asking credit at the corner grocery.”

“Sixty days more will see business

booming as of old, and silver mines and oil wells will be so plentiful that every man can have one/'_ __

“Look out for a of a time. Those

sunspots didn’t come for nothing.”

“Be placid and complacent. Nothing

ia. going to happen. Those things on sun were merely freckles. He was out doors too much lost summer."

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_ 0//'yvrei A FLORIDA smzzaan. Q), _J l

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HHH. F9bl'\1°l'¥t‘ _'with thy shield Phan. kindly hnii, or snow! Refrain" But, coma to think at it (how iine), 0! ics and snow by flood and field! From such n sorry thing :is rain, ' Thy days this year are twenty-nine, Thy days are few, but twenty-eight, That lovers may be glad and merry ’ And maybe Bess, before sha's thirty. `Wh€r6on to sleigh and slide and skate, Through all thy days, O i-‘sbruaryi 0n that last day may win her Bertini

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SHE WAS

Maud-Not a bit, I guess I take after

the iee trust, you know.

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Nu' rrmm. _

Jack-Ain't_ you a little ai`rnid` to trust yourself on this thimioe! _`

father in that rmpeet. He belongs to

This Was

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1/é cuz/ IDN’ been awenencing __ biimrd in mount. enaunra was frmmwrsu ‘

° '_ févff 558 $01* ’

FTW?

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‘_ ' ' _ Luraim,~-’I`hat’s unique. wl"i0`G\'HI\<|Iv1, why is it that when the groundhog his shadow on the ‘Z-27-72 Eve]yuL§_'e,_ She Bay, they wen; secon_d day of 1~`ebi-nary it will be had weather for six weeks? _

.. _ *J I _ me” _ arofimd all oi__o_ne day wading inwnow (-f:_`1;_l\<li1H-l\i{J_;'_cl:_ u matter of climate, Willie; same thing would 11119197" if the

'_ I -»__ _pggn V& V9 dn ta up to 1: eir an lea. _ EWU” 08 ‘MIS UI - _ '

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to be thanéciul for. ' .' , ' 'and hash or breakfast every day in the

be thankful for?

When I went dovm to`Port Jdierson

the other day I wandered into a_grocer_y where half a dozen men wue talking poli- tial. When two or.thiee of them bid expressed 'their preference ibr Pféiidenml

eanggiaha eine _rlough and ox-ugged iellor n an 'am : _ ' m'°‘Gent?omea, 1'.m for Taidilnt and last and snr! time.” No otbsrlmndidau can eo _ within 40 of__hlm.” ___gi_¥", yau_aq;,_ _ulwnaoon for me jg him- Inputs I

i gig! ie; iii..

lolttvmeqwvinona _ __ in-horn. Ouvgwal, ,

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Fifi! ea id dviffw Y annsnmtr

i _ coli, when an *li-ill

Qggiié. ` Qiiig S g. ;§»=§¥§ ' E

When He Fiouped `

_' ~ :.1 aug wan wana ooo _ann of wma

on to tall him about those cowsf Allie listened to me the team started to his _eyen, and when I had tlnished he took a _hundred-dollar bill from hi veit pocket and handed it out and said: _" ‘Never mind, old boy. Taka this and hny two more oowa.’

“Gentlemen all, that man was Taft, had that'a why he in my candidate, and why I'm mdy to holler a lung out for

him.” ' -

"I read about that incident' in the pm

rr] 'I said, "and I use that you made a , ig lniltaksf’

"But how could IT" ' 'Im het, I was on the train

'tht dam' The man who shui testi and

_lrifyoa this monay was Senator' Fm~_ I You have gottho naman mind up.

”‘1_\%<."

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l’m for Taft first, last a__nd_ all the time.

“Then har:-ah for Forakeri He’s the

-'boy for mei" JOE KERR.

_ sLE|emNG

lvl

Our deed

ri.. ._-.._.__._."‘»1_f'§’;'_i"_..“‘ Sha iiéfstisd dose tb md, but Th hm# ehriini da-in'\» haw _ num -ami'

ur morn rd on

S: _ii rg

"No, I'm not on the road just now, but

taking a rest to recover from shock,” re- plied the drummer when questioned about having so much spare time on his honda

“Did some near and dear relative gn

suddenly?

"Oh, no. All my near and dear ones

are all right."

“Did the grip hit you hui?"

"Haven’t had it at aIl."

"Thea your bank buster, maybe?" "I-Iadn’t a red cent in any bank when

the crash came. No, it was nothing like that. Oi course you mad in the 'papers once a year about the owner of the busi- ness calling in Tam, Dick or -Han-y,` sind patting him on the back and oiering him an interest as a reward. That/s what they ‘call New_ Yeat's stuff. Them were four of as good fellows in the house I was

working forhéast year, and on the Slut of December t boss called us in and said:

Different _ -

tiers and good men, and l"d like no' buff ter for partners. In fact, Pm ming to make you partners, if you are a3`veesble.”

"Our four hearts went# into ons tour

tliroats, and weffelt like_thl'owlng our hats into the air and whooping. We hadn't got a ilrm grip on thisgood- news yet, when t/he hom continued:

“"The assets ot the house are £00,000,

and the liabilities $100,000 beyond that. It yoa._want to come in we'll lacks up a iirm of live, and' then. make x glorious failure of it together!" _ _ ~

"And you went!" was asked.

"Sure, Mike.”

"And the iirm failed?"

"Went 'down threé days later.”

“And about the shook?" “0h, that was caused by my havingau-

thnx-ity to bona the. porter for thou three days, and* then things coming to;,an_ and so suddenly. I had just t _-1lilh.iIl¢0

“ ‘Boys, 1've had my eye on all o_f_gou_

_for a long time past. ou am all_ us-

weariag stand-up onllara.an§°Hkl._zl,0vGl» d I h d t f ii f

an _ a a,rea _u_um_ _outer hin_1-'a"g`rea`t Fixture.” `

,D ._

yer it w

Uncle Reuben-I don't think 'much nf these here Frenebfdllbsl i

k|_n bring me a portion of this here "menu" whst's top' of , I

el done. ~--' ' 7 _ _

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i-Jum _~--r-finf-_ _-

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