UID. The look on the man’s face is priceless.

Armageddon: A movie trailer (those big longads for comingattractions) foran upcoming disaster flick. The copy reads something like this: If you were TERRIFIED by Earthquake, SHOCKED by the Towering Inferno, you'll be SCARED SHITLESS by Armageddon!!! Later on in the film there’s a trailer for another disaster flick (whose name escapes my sieve-like memory) in which we get to see Donald Sutherland (Kiefer’s Dad) do a dignified face-plant into a Black Forest Cake, while two young lovers argue in a complete circle and large bits of airplane crash all around them.

Catholic High School Girls In Trouble: an- other day, another movie trailer, this time fora porno. All the nudity which got this flickan “R” rating is contained in this sketch; the women and men keep their underwear on for the rest of the movie. We are treated to many, many breasts in this sketch. We are also treated to the following clever line: “Never before has the beauty of the sexual act been so callously exploited!”. Alllin all it’s a funny piece, with some hilariously predictable sound effects, but the abundance of naked flesh may offend some viewers. Consider yourself warned.

Fistful of Yen: A kung-fu movie parody where the cliches are beaten up almost as much as the bad guys. This mini-movie has it all: long, improbably drawn out fights against invincible villains, an evil warlord, a token love interest, and the Statue of liberty vacationing in Hong Kong. This sketch also makes fun of people who make fun of Chinese names: one guard is Big Dong, another’s name is Hung Well, and the third is Enormous Genitals. The chop-socky is incredibly fun, including one scene where the hero kung-fus sixty people in a narrow hallway and then has to walk over them without step- ping on them. This is the longest sketch in the movie, and maybe the best.

The acting? Good. The guy who plays the Bruce Lee stereotype is pretty good at comedic double takes and has great facial expressions. The rest of the cast (which is enormous) does okay, mostly getting by on the great script.

Scenes to Watch For: Didn’t we already cover this?

Minor Quibble: The tape | watched was pretty old, so there was occasionally a bit of audio static. Plus, the older VHS tapes suffer from intermittent poor sound quality (just like CBC radio) and this makes some of the lines harder to understand. Not a big problem, you just have to pay closer attention.

Judgement: Easy to like, hard to review. Many Jim Abrahms staples like the classic “*Ciga- rette?’ ‘Yes, it is” are represented in one form or another. Although Abrahms and the Zuckers Brothers weren't yet on board, this is definitely

the film that got them started. And, like the Canada Post Heritage Minutes, it proves that history can be fun.

Found At: That’s Entertainment, Univer- sity Avenue, on a little tiny rack labelled “cult”.

TRENT DRAKE

20/X-Press/September 23, 1993

Last Splash

The Breeders

(Polygram)

Charmingly weird and real propulsive. Truly wonderful.

4

Human Wheels

John Mellencamp

(Polygram)

Another solid effort but Mellencamp doesn’t seem able to write those irresistible singles like he used to.

3

Perfectly Good Guitar

John Hiatt

(A&M)

Hiatt was momentarily inspired in the late 80’s with Bring the Family and Slow Turning. Since, he’s been pretty forgettable. Reasonably well-writ- ten but immensely contrived.

2.5

In Utero Nirvana (MCA) Only listened to it once but it sounds pretty brilliant. Real review coming in two weeks. 4.5

KIRBY FERGUSON

“Taking chances in a world of chaos” is what Ceremony tries to express in all their tunes. This 90’s version of the Beatles has been able to create a unique sound by using bagpipes, organs, and stires and many other instruments along with their band. Hang Out Your Poetryis analbum a little off the “norm” , yet their style is one to be appreciated.

Is rap still in? Split Personality seems to think so. Coming from the ghetto, attitudeis obvious in their album | Don’t Know. Their music is

repetitive and monotonous, but hey, if you like —

that style, go for it.

On their album Everyone Else is Doing It, Why Can't We? the Cranberries incorporate their Irish background into all their songs to create a

__SOUND_sALVATION___

sound which is uniquely their own. The lead singer can hit some wailing notes and the band has the potential to go far in the alternative side

of music. GRACE KIMPINSKI

Bat Out of Hell Il

Back Into Hell

Meatloaf

(MCA)

Bat Out of Hell - the original is my favourite “record”. A couple of times a month, | spin that plastic diskand listen to Jim Steinman sing about “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” and “Hot Summer Night”. | adore it, and its sales show that I’m not the only one.

When asked to review Bat Out of Hell Il: Back Into Hell, | jumped at the chance -which proves the old proverb, “look before you leap”. | didn’t hate the album, but | certainly won’t be listening to it more than once a year. The whole album just completely disappointed me, but maybe it’s one of those albums that grows on you, after you hear it five or six hundred times (I did hear that the song “I’d Do Anything For Love, But | Wouldn't Do That” is currently #1 in Australia).

J. CASELEY

radio TOWAVES

Hi, and welcome to another year with CIMN! We started a new broadcast season on September 12. and our new programmers are busy getting settled and working off any on-air shyness. Lots of your favourite veterans are back as well. Our programme guide, ALTER-EGO, should be out towards the end of the month, so you can check that out to find out exactly when your favourite programmes are hitting the airwaves. Or heck! You can just lock your radio dial on CIMN (700 am in Bernardine and Marian Halls, 104.5 fm cable in Blanchard or off- campus, island wide.), and listen to everything we play. And if you are sitting there reading this and saying, “Gosh darn it, how can | get involved?”, fear not! there are just a scant few programming slots open, mostly on Monday and Thursday afternoons and we are still looking for people for our news and information programming. You don’t need experi- ence in itself (Many of our programmers are also working- and getting paid!! -at commercial stations across Canada. If you like money...)

We also need people to write things. This could

be articles for ALTER-EGO, this weekly column in the X-Press or editing and writing scripts for news plays and commercials. To get involved, come up to the third floor of the Barn during business hours ask for Rory or Danielle, or pick up an application form

And as always, we need people to listen, and to phone in their requests at 892-CIMN

Keep in mind the concert at the Barn, Oct. 16

Be there, bring all your friends, and have them bring all their friends. It'll be a great time, and we'll bring you more details in the next few weeks

Until next time, get wired with CIMN!