sence. With guys it was "Hey, dad! Do I look all thing right? Will I ever different. He could say right?" be able to face anOCher things to them more readily "Just fine, son. Got a girl again?"

than he could to girls. big date tonight, eh? Who He CreePed dejECtedly Girls frightened him, even is she?" home-

though he was keenly __—“Just sdme girl I knew Stay tUUEd for our interested in them. He from high school." dramatic conclusion next' didn't know why he was a- "Well, have a good time. Week-

fraid. Perhaps it was Take care."

simply that he regarded the-. "I will dad. See you as an alien species devoid later."

from his experience. V Frank climbed into his

Lightning

P.S. For all those who had a negative reaction to my first article: In

Anyway, Frank happened red Pinto and rode off to immortal words of Jim to see Sylvia sitting by Sylvia's house. He was al- B . outon (for all you herself 1n Ch? COffee Shop most petrified as he walked basketball fans out one Tuesday morning. He up the steps. "Will she there) "I'm lad ou decided that he might as approve of me?" "Will I didnvt'take 1% erz Well 80 over and talk to make a good impression with Sonall u Realg E FIRST BIG DATE _ A her. After all, he had her or will I foul up?" thou by it warmsyé SHORT STORY nothing to lose. "What of her folks answer g ’ y

heart to see the reac- tion I could have pre— dicted before I wrote it. Of course, nobody seemed to have the time’ or the inclination to read it carefully and try to discover what

the article was really about. I thought I had given several dead giveaways throughout

the whole story, but for those who misinter- preted them or missed them altogether, here they are again (pay attention folks! There may be an exam later): Clue number one: The title, Men's Liberation and all that (.?.) What word comes logically after "that"?

Clue number two: I said words to the effect

that girls must buy their own drinks from now on unless they happen to be an ac— quaintance, a girl— friend, a relative or

a nice looking broad.

I could have used the phrase "any girl" but Iithought_that would be too obvious and would let the cat out of the bag.

Clue number three: "We will fight them in the residences; we will fight them in the bars; we will fight them in the restaurants; we shall never surrender" and "Up against the wal female chauvenist pig". Obviously perversions of well known cliches. Clue number four: "For too long have we been treated as mere money objects." The allusion is all too obvious.

What am I trying to say? I refuse to spell it out for you except to give you two more hints which were not in the article. (1) I wish

I were taking psycholog because this would be a great experiment.

(2) I wish I had writte it on April 1. If you still haven't figured it out by now, I_give up! You're hopeless.

the door?" "Will I be stuck for something to say?"

These were the questions that kept buzzing through his mind. Luckily, Sylvia answered the door, and they were off to the theatre.

During the ride, Frank tried to make light conver- sation to ease the tension that he though Sylvia was sharing with him. However, her answers were short and noncommittal. She asked him such questions as "Is my hair alright? Is my slip showing? Do I look a mess?

I must." To all these inquiries, Frank replied that she looked just fine.

The reached the theatre ‘and went in. The movie was a Jerry Lewis comedy, one that Frank had been wanting to see for about 3 months. The movie was extremely funny and Frank laughed throughout. Sylvia, however, said not a word nor conveyed a single emotion to indicate her pre- sence.

The ride home was even more awkward than the ride to the movie. Frank tried to loosen up things with some conversation but to no avail.

"What did you think of the movie Sylvia?"

"It was okay."

"But did you really enjoy it?" '

"I guess so."

"You know movies are a lot likezlife. There are comedies in life as well as in fiction. For example, this is my second year of College and I really haven't made up my mind what I want to do yet. What do you want to do?" I

"I don't know."

"Say do ybu want to go to bed with me tonight?"

"I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"That's okay. It was nothing important."

Frank dropped Sylvia off at her house. He gave her a peck on the cheek and said that he hoped she enjoyed the evening. "It was okay," replied Sylvia. ~As Frank walked back to his car he kept thinking, "What did I do wrong? She obviously had a lousy time. Am I a klutz? Can't I do an -

Frank Lockwood was an cremely happy individual. agine! He, Frank Lockwood d a date with the most autiful girl on campus. 1via Goldman had long, owing hair, blue eyes at sparkled like stars

a moonlit night, an urglass figure, and an ra of sweetness and love- ness. It was too good to

true.

Frank knew Sylvia from gh school. He and she had mm in the same class from ede nine through Grade elve. He had always been :scinated by her beauty d elegance. In those :ys, he wouldn't have stood chance. Sylvia was court- .by all the athletic heros Trimbleton High. What ance would a.guy who was foot 10, inclined to be ocky, and not too very unsome, have had with her en. Now things were anged at Rushmore College. ough Sylvia had shone out, ere were many other girls_ e could choose from. She :d lost some of her stature t none of her beauty. If t was possible, she had be- one even more beautiful Ian she had been in high chool.

Frank had not dated much n high school. He always eemed to be the outsider. obody ever payed much ttention to him, and his aturally shy nature drove im further and further nto his shell. Girls Othered him. He was never ure how he was expected 0 behave in their pre—

"Hi, Sylvia. Long time no see."

"0h, Hi Frank."

"Mind if I set down?"

"No, go ahead."

"What have you been doing with yourself lately?"

"On, nothing much."

"This is the second year for you, isn't it Sylvia?"

"Yes."

"What courses are you taking this term?"

"Two English, two History and a Political Science." 7 "Heh! That's quite a coincidence. I'm in Arts and majoring in English."

"That's nice."

"Say, are you busy Friday night? There's a really good movie playing at the 'Phoenix' and I can't think of anyone I'd rather take."

To Frank's utter aston- ishment, she said yes and the date was set for Friday night. Frank was beside himself with excitement. He was a bundle of nerves and energy. He could hardly wait for the hours to tick away until it would be Friday.

Finally, the big day arrived. This was it, the moment that he was waiting for. Frank hardly heard a word his professors said in class. His head was in the clouds, dreaming of what a fantastic time he was going to have.

Preparations for the big date were extensive. First of all he took a bath. He decided that he would wash and just lie in the tub for 15 - 20 minutes soaking up the soothing warmth of the water. However, he was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he dried him— self off before he remembered that he was going to lie and soak in the tub. This oper- ation completed, he went about the task of selecting clothes. First he laid out his pink shirt and his blue trousers. Next he had to decide what jacket to wear. He finally hit on his new grey sportscoat. Then he walked timidly downstairs for inspection.