pets

i once had a hamster

i think his name was bruce

i tossed him in a barbecue

and washed him down with juice

once i had a puppy dog

he loved to go out barking

iran over him with my truck one day and now he enjoys parking

i had a little kitty cat

i treated the bastard well

i dropped her off a building

now the bastard’s burning in hell

i used to have a big fat cow who gave milk whenever i wanted

one day i wanted a hamburger and now my barn is haunted

pets.

-Stephan MacLeod

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