page 6
(1;; .-.-= .u-v as”)
The Netted Gem
Calendar
Thursday
Thursday, September 20: Engineer’s pub from 9 to l at the Barn. Music by Eclipse. Admission free to freshettes but $1 to others, 5c from each beer sold goes to the
Terry Fox fund. Thursday, September 20: “How to Study Math”, the
last of the Studentship lec- tures, will be given at 4:30 in Room 208 Dalton.
Ffiday
Friday, September let. Lunchtime 11:30 to 1 p.m. Cheese and Fruit Bar. A variety of cheeses and fresh fruit at 40¢ each.
Friday, September 21: Movies playing in the Lounge this week are 48 Hours, Footloose, and The Thing.
Friday. September 21: Hear Dr. Ronald Baker, President Emeritus of UPEI, speak on “Some Universities in Thailand, Malaysia, Australia, and New Zealand” at 3:30 in the Faculty Lounge Main Building. All welcome, happy
Friday, September 21: In
field hockey, UPEI plays Mt. A at 4 p.m. Friday, September I 21:
Parking Lot C closes.
Saturday
Saturday: Fencing Club at 10:30 to noon. All welcome. Kid brothers or sisters can come from 9 to 10:30 am.
Sunday‘
Sunday, September 23: In field hockey, UPEI plays Moncton at l p.m.
Tuesday
Tuesday, September 25th. Lunchtime 11:30 to 1 p.m. Sandwich Bar. Make your own sandwich on a kaiser bun or our home-made french bread. You make it! We weigh it! 30¢ per ounce.
Wednesday
Wednesday, September 26: Psych Club meets at 1:30 in Kelly 237.
Thursday
Thursday, September 27th. Suppertime 4:30 to 6 p.m. “Berried Treasures”, “Make you own shortcake”. We will have t-biscuits, a variety of fillings and oodles of whipped topping. 60¢ each.
Thursday, September 27: Business Society Pub from 9 to 1 in the Barn. See page 10.
hour from 4:30 to 6 p.m. “
plcprjn’ ON ME?
1
The Spa West Royalty Fitness Center
in the Ch’town Mall 566-1400 -
STUDENT MEMBERSHIP
Racquet Club
$192
Fitness Club $155
Goodxtill April 15/85
Our Facilities Include:
2 Tennis Courts Swimming Pool Jogging Track
Sunrooms 1 Pro Shop Babysitting Room
4 Racquetball Courts 2 International Squash Courts
Men’s & Ladies Sauna Men's & Ladies Whirlpool
Weight Training Centre Olympic Weight Room
Broken Racquet Club
Men‘s & Ladies Locker Rooms
Individual
Instruction
Available in Racquetball, Squash,
Tennis,
thess, Swimming,
Golf,
Weight Training.
We are Eastern Canada’s most
complete Fitness/Racquet Club
*flfiéeaeemee
September 20, 1984'
Viewtrom the Top. \
In the beginning, there was Cranston Snord giving you the view from the U.P.E.I. Engineering Society —— the View from the TOP. After a brief retirement, he has arisen to prove to everyone on campus that you can’t keep an Engineer down too long; unless you are a girl, of course.
But as Batman has Robin, Clark Kent has Lois Lane, Laurel has Hardy, and Chuck has Di (twice), Cranston now has Walter P. Capon bring- ing you the color com- mentary on campus life.
The Never-Ever Ending Story — By W. P. Capon and crew
Our story is about Fortes- quoopie, a hero of sorts. It was a hard name to learn to spell; but by the end of English 101, he had mastered it.
Fortesquoopie heard of a land far away (just like in other stories —— so we won’t explain what it looked like because you can use your imagination for that).
And this land was being harassed by a terrible crea- ture known by the locals as razinbagg.
This creature was horrible. Disgusting. It looked quite a bit like a cat with one eye and a tail on its head.
The reason the people were so scared of the razinbagg was because it walked back- wards.
So, as most stories go, our hero want to kill it; but he was not smart enough to know how.
Fortesquoopie went to the smart man on the mountain. No one knew how he be- came so smart; but they guessed it had something to do with wizicks. And, of course, he lived on top of a mountain, which was the other requirement for being smart.
The smart man told him he could only kill the creature with a special sword made of pig meat. Fortesquoopie did
not understand what a sword of pig meat was; but after he had drank all the smart man’s beer, he found out what a sword of pig meat was.
So he went and stabbed the razinbagg right in the eye with his sword. The creature screamed and tried to push the sword out but Fortes-
quoopie kept pushing. This is sort of the end of the story, but it is not
finished because out of no- where came all sorts of little razinbaggs.
Things looked desperate but Fortesquoopie consoled himself with the thought that there was only one thing worse than flogging a dead
horse to be continued. (Editor’s note: The End.) Engineer’s Dictionary Sass-a—frass: something you don’t do to a 250 lb. frass. traffic light: a little green light that turns red as you approach it. head-banger: a woodpecker with no beak. '
cocaine: thinking man’s Dristan.
chocolate lips: speak for themselves.
The Engineering Society is donating five cents from each beer purchased at the pub tonight to the Terry Fox Run. All freshettes are admitted free. So we’ll see you there.
’15 UKE‘S" Var/g!"
Trivial Pursuit
CH What part of a rooster does a capon not have? PUB Why does the cafeteria serve pizza the day after
a pub?
AE Does anyone know where the Anthropology Dept. is? ' BIO Whose chicken was choking in the Field Biology
lab last week?
, JIl/‘WS
.'=.'::':-'.
' .a:='...-:........ . fifififififififim
~+- ;
ALLTHE LATEST RELEASES ON A GIANI 10 ft. SCREEN
Insane-gm
:afi