12 ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT

The Rude Mechanicals: as Rude as they wanna be

In this era of megacute boy bands and shiny, spicy girl bands sweeping the airwaves with their sugar donut lyrics and hopscotch melodies, it’s refreshing to find a group of artists who are in it for what's really impor-

tant.

Gedder India.

Of course, I’m refer- ring to the Rude Mechanicals — Charlottetown’s own hot- test hotties. I had the oppor- tunity to catch up with ied strapping young men mid- way into their latest rock and roll fiasco.

The Rude Mechanicals consist of Dennis Ellsworth (singin etcetera), Peter Forbes (head guitarist), Todd MacLean (second guitarist), Matt McQuaid (basser), and Mike Mella (drummist). Anyone familiar with the fine aes- thetic presence of this band would wonder the obvious: how did they come together?

As in the case of many copycat cute boy bands, like the New Kids on the Block and *N Sync, an eccentric mastermind saw something special in each Mechanical one fine autumn day during an international talent call. Bill Tangier was originally looking for a male stripping troupe, but was pleasantly surprised to discover that these boys were as cool as they were dreamy.

The boys had “jammed” occasionally be- fore meeting Tangier, and had adopted the moniker “the Considerate Mechanicals” to accompany their milk-drink- ing image. Tangier — or “Wild Bill” as the boys call him — scrapped this “sissy wimp-wimp’ look and put the rude in the mechanical. Needless to stay, a constella- tion of five stars was born.

Tangier brought the fab fivesome to what is now known as the “Rude Com- plex,” where he proceeded to put the boys through their paces not unlike a Fame re- run. The Rude Complex is nestled in the most fragile area of the Greenwich Dunes, and is reached via a secret underground tunnel. Me- chanical Matt let me in on an exclusive detail of the com- plex to share with our read- ers.

“Not many people know this,” Matt begins, “but we have these mirrors on the walls.” Apparently used for what Matt calls “rock moves,” the hunky gents spend a great deal of their practice time posturing to get every es es te just right prior to auditioning them before a live audience. This hard work and dedica- tion really shows, and their fans (especially the ladies) appreciate it.

What is less appreci- ated, however, is the Rude boys’ identities, which often gets lost behind the musical exhibitionism. Each Rude Mechanical embodies the spirit of rock and roll, not unlike the grandfathers of the hanging tough movement, NKOTB.

As any band of hotties knows, certain features that girls “go for” need to be per- sonified by their stage pres- ence. The Rude Mechanicals understand this, and ex- plained their own system of delightful alter egos.

Dennis, the boys tell me, is the “rebel” figure, the “bad” kind of guy. He is what we would call the Donnie Wahlberg character. His edgy, straight-outta-the- Ch’town-ghettos ‘tude makes him the guy ae ees want because the others don’t

want him, according to Peter. Dennis looks for lots of hair in a girl. Lots and lots of hair. His favourite colour is or- ange. Matt’s big ee corre- _— with the buff physique that was so trademark to Danny Knight. Rumour has it that Matt recently doffed his characteristic rat-tail in a half-hearted attempt at dis- lling the similarities that aunt him. What does he look for in a girl, ladies? “She’s gotta be 6 feet tall with huge. ... Oh, and a shitty ee very chic aggregate

The Cadre

needs the slick appeal of the sharp-looking heartbreaker, and Todd fits this bill to a T. He’s the Jordan of the lot, and admits to looking for girls who are “5°3" with tobacco hair.” But hands off, ladies — he’s taken!

Peter is what we call the Joey character, because he’s the shortest. The quali- ties he values most are a good a and honesty.

is heartthrob stresses that looks don’t mean anything.

This bring us to the fellow who must be the Jonathan of the band. The most polite of the lot, Mike

¢ 6 April 1999

has this to share with us: “I like girls that like me for me.” Rumour has it that there is already a lady in his life.

So where do the Rude Mechanicals go from here? Faster and more furiously than a cork popped out of a champaign bottle, these chaps will be Scoot a record after exam season lets up. They've also made top billing for the forth coming convocation ball.

UPEI should be proud of its ambassadors of rock. The Rude Mechanicals truly are Charlottetown’s Number Two party band.

Pi

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