Welcome to 1993. We’re back from another year of jokes, cartoons and ridicule. As all of you must have noticed, ‘“View From the Top”’ was not in the X - Press last week. This was not a mistake on our part, we just didn’t care. (Actually, we slept in, as we were still trying to recover from New Year’s Eve.)

This year, we would like to see more col- umns in the X - Press from other societies and clubs on campus. We are tired of being the only society that takes the time to try to improve the X- Press by adding a little humour. Last semes- ter we offended some people with our page. Well, this year, instead of whining about it in the Pit, put your comments in print. Tell us how you feel. Maybe we can do something about it...or maybe we’ll ignore you. Who Knows! We do know one thing. Its been awfully quiet up here on the 4th floor, here in Duffy bldg. We’re starting to wonder if the formaldehyde has finally gotten to the Bios. or if they have they lost their will power and admitted that we rule Duffy! Who knows!

Engineering Society course descriptions

Now that the first semester is over we would like to present to you the course descriptions you should have read before you took the course (from an Engineering student’s viewpoint). Chem 110 - General Chemistry If you remem- ber all of your chemistry from high school,

forget it. It won’t help. Actually, it will prob-

ably confuse you. This course is the same topics arranged in a different manner that will keep you guessing all year. The only bonus is that there is no calculus involved.

Math 151 or 251 - Calculus If you can pass this course, don’t worry. All you have to know is how to differentiate and integrate. Forget the theory, it’s all crap. If you fail the course, don’t worry, so did everyone else.

English 101 - English composition It’s your native language!! You should be able to pass it! (Besides a little B.S. goes a long way) Engineering 121 - Graphics This is your first engineering course. Enjoy it while you can, it will get harder. If you have trouble with this course there are only two explanations. First, you do not understand English, secondly, you just shouldn’t be an engineer.

Engineering 111 - Surveying Take it. It’s fun. You get to go outside and look in the windows of Blanchard from the lawn.

Physics 211 - Electricity and Magnetism You were about to think ‘‘I learned that in High School’’’ weren’t you? Then you remember. You know calculus now. This is the single most disgusting course we have to take (in 2nd year). Engineering 221 - Statics The physics of things that don’t move. Howhard can it be? They don’t move. If you can stay awake for 3 classes in one

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week, you deserve to pass. If you can do it without having to put on a jacket during class, you deserve honours.

Engineering 211 - Geology Contrary to popular belief you should attend class. They are enter- taining and you get to watch movies and relive the “60’s and ‘70’s with narrated flashbacks. Engineering 241 - Ethics Why? Why not? You can laugh at other people on camera! Engineering 321 - Dynamics Despite what the calendar says it’s on Wednesday night only. But don’t worry. Buy the book anda highlighter and underline your heart out. (No notes needed). Engineering 311 - Strengths Your in 3rd year...Same prof...same jokes...different room. Engineering 341 - Electric Circuits The book sucks! However, do your assignments because those problems have a tendency of appearing where the marks are.

The Engineering Society would like to say that our little pun is not meant to influence anyone’s decisions about courses. Besides, if you took it seriously, you’re a knobber. Nor do we intend on insulting any profs. We know you know we are not serious. (Gulp...We Hope!)

Engineering quote of the week - It’s not whether you know your material. Its how big your calculator is.

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appearing live at the Barn Tuesday, Jan. 19th

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PANTHER LOUNGE

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