Summerside Journal -- 1869-08-26 -- Page 1

—Pournal,

GFERN PIONEER.

DEVOTED TO LITERATURE, SCIENCE, COMMERCE, A

GRICULTURE, T

Vol. 4.

‘Summerside, Prince Edward Island, Thurs

day, August 26, 1869.

No. 48.

THE
Summerside Journal,

18 PRINTED AND PUBLISHED

EVERY THURSDAY EVENING,

BY
JOSEPH BERTRAM,
AT HIS OFFICE, CENTRAL STREET,

TERMS:

1 copy for one year, in advance,
st as half advance,

“ “

ADVERTISEMENTS.

nserted at moderate rates and in good style.

Srrcran AGreemMENTS may be made on
reasonable terms for a whole, a half, or quar-

ter column, or by the year,

Job Printing

of every description, performed with neatne
and despatch, and at moderate rates,
at the Jounnav Office

MOON'S PILASES.

New Moon, 7th day, 5h. 56m, evening, W.

First Quarter, 14th day, 8h. 28m. morn, N,
Fall Moon, 22d day, Oh. 11m. morning,
Last Quarter, 30th day, 3h. 46m, evening,&

“9 | par| SUN [ saa Waun’e moon! « : DOCTOR FULLER ~
C4 ust, dec. )
& | ween'rises-sets! clock|north| rises aw PHYSICIAN, SURGEON & ACOUCHEUR
eee RESIDENCE AND OFFICE ON
| Jn m|hm|m s| | hemfh Dl b \ .
TiSun 4 47/7 85) @ 1167 G6] morn|i4 BO 30 Central Street,... e . Summerside
2 Mon 48} 24) 5 57/42 36) 0 1 #5| (Directly opposite the Summerside Bank)
3 \Tues | 49) 23) 6 53/26 59) 0 36) 34! Summerside, may 13. 1869.
4 Wed | 50) 22) § 4811 4) 1 22 Ere crn ear ET oOo EOE
5 Thurs) 51} 21) 5 42.54 53] 2 13) 30 KERSHAW & EDWARD'S
6 Frid 62) 19 5 36 33 25) 3 14 27 IMPROVED PATENT
7 Sat | 53) 17) & 2% 21 41) 4 22 24). i Lv Aree
8 Sun 4 54/7 15 5 al 4 41) sets |14 al Non-conducting and aporising
Maw on 10) G 14/47 20) O OC 1
10 ‘Puce | m6 Isls 59 5519 9| 17) Lire and Burgler Proof
11 [Wed | 57| 11] 4 56/12 10) 9 41! 14 .
12 Thurs} 69] 10) 4 46/64 10/10 13) 11 § & ¥ ei §
13 [Frid [5 0| 9) 4 36/35 56/10 45] 9 e
14 |Sat A i ‘ a be au li 20 i ‘ MANUFACTURERS OF
15 Sun 5 2/7 5) 4 13/58 46,mornl# Si RANK VAULT'S, BURGLAR PROOF
te Mom) FL ae FER oA eo aalig be VAULT DOUS IRON VAULE DOORS,
17 \Tucs} 4) 2) 8 40:20 42) 0 4918 O83) ANT COMBINATION BANK
18 Wed | es oolat 491 2 80) 52 /LOCKS, DEED BOXES, PATENT JAIL
Bs Wate B73 8122 4/8 281 50 {LOCKS & CRLL DOORS, &e. &e,
21 |Sat 8 56/2 54/2 7 rises}! 48] Tuos. Futtier, | Daviv Starr & Sons,
22 Sun [5 9/6 54) 2 3 7 2313 46) Travelling Agent. Agents, Halifax,
23 |Mon 10) 52) 2 50) 42) Montreal. Dee 16, '68 y
24 |'Tues | 12} 50] 2 TA 68) ae
25 |Wed 18} 49) 1% 39 36 E. FE. PURDY’S
26 |Thors Ve 7 i a Ha NEW
27 |\Krid 5 5 Hit
an fone +], 17), 43) 2 ol 28 Marble and Freestone
29 [Sun 5 82/18 28 af 1) vT, WNT.
30 |Mon | 19] 389) 0 24]/54 88|t1 12) 20 ESTABLISHMENT,
31 [Cues | 21] 37/0 G33 Ojmorn! 16 (NEXT DOOR TO BEER AND SONS’)
Summerside Markets. KING SQUARE,
Aug. 26, 1869. | CHARLOTTETOWN, P. E. ISLAND.
Beef perlb Bd a 6d ————
Mutton per lb 4d abd|_All orders punctually attended to.
Oats per bush i: Call and See!
Potatoes per bush 10d a Is “9 1
, Jan 7, ‘6 y
Turnips per bush 10d a ls ne
Butter per lb lld a 12d A W ANDRES
Lard per at Hy a Han . ‘ ,
Tallow per lb. da 10¢
Eggs per ig 8d ve Marble W orker,
Hides per lb ‘ A : ; us
Mackerel per dox ee Point Du Chene, Shediac N. B.
Codfish per qt s a 19s
Pork per Ib by carcass _4da 6d! MONUMENTS, TOMBS, GRAVE-
Ficuy i bbl : WEE if ane STONES, &e., &eo.
‘lour per cw 8 to 185
Ginent ay es 168 a17s| AMERICAN AND ITALIAN MARBLE CON-
Hay per Ton 50s a 608 stantly on hand.
Pine Boards 10s | Can furnish Gravestones and Monuments ata
Spruce Boards 4sa58| less price than any other establishment in

Charlottetown Markets.
Ch. Town, Aug. 26, 1869.

6s. 3d.
78. 6d.
atthe end of year 9s.

Persons getting up cLuns of Ten Subscribers
will be entitled to the Journar for oneyear.

Almanac for August, 1869.

Business Gards.

Mr. W. H. POPE

sumed the practice of the Law.

Prince Edward Island.
Charlottetown, March 18, 1869,

THOMAS KELLY,

AND

NOTARY PUBLIC, &c.

NEW LONDON.
April 15, 186 pro 3m.

EGS to inform the public that he has re-

Orrice—A few doors below the Bank of

BARRISTER - AT - LAW

SUMMERSIDE, - - - - P. E. ISLAND

R. DODD may again be consult-
ed, at his old residence, in MARGA'TE,

DR. J. PRICE,
Physician & Surgeon,
88

SUMMERSIDE,
October 12, 1868,

Orrice—At the SumMenrsipis DruG Srore,
next door to Bank, Central Street

P. BE. ISLAND.

DR. JARVIS

Has REMOVED his Residence to
MERSIDE, next door to the Rey. Mr,
Frame’s, on Central Street.
rE
or at Hunt & Co’s Drug Store, at all times.

Y} Summerside, June 8, L869.

the Provinces, and pay a duty besides.
p@™ Ouvers can be left at Berrram’s Book
Store and at D. Exman’s, Esq., Summerside,
or sent to

Beef per Ib 44d a Bd A. W. ANDRES.
Mutton per Ib 4da7d] point Du Chene, June 11th, 1868.
Pork per Ib,, by carcass, Bda 8d = 5 an
Ham per |b hat WILLIAM BEAIRSTO,
Geese ‘ Mine ‘ ; :

‘owl sa ls 6
Deva ahah »3itt/Gommission Merchant,
Flour per 100 Ibs 17s a 188 ‘oneer & General Agent
Oatmeal per 100 188 a 198 Auctioneer u GEIS
Buckwheat Flour, per Ib 2d a 24d WATER STREET,
Codfish per quintal 188 0 208) ommerside, -- P FE. Island

18d a 19d

Butter per 1b
we 1s 3d a 1s 4d

eH Al a weit GARVELL BROTHEL
peu inate AUCTIONEERS,

Eggs per dozen
Potatoes per bushel
Barley ‘* “ bs
Oats

Hay per ton

Hides per lb
Sheepskins each
Spruce Boards per
Hemlock uJ

45 a 4s 6d
100 ft.
“

BANK OF

Charlottetown.
President—Hon. Danteu Brenan. ,
Cashier—Wittiam CunDaLl, Esquire.
Discount Days—Mondays & Thursdays.
Hours of Business—Fom 10 a.m. to lp.m.

1s Gd a 1s 9d
Sea 3s 3d
60s a 703

4d

4s a 4s 6d
83 6d a 48

Commission Merchants,
AND GENERAL AGENTS.
BANK BUILDING, - - QUEEN STREET,

CHARLOTTETOWN, P. 5. Lo
WILLIAM DODD,

Commission Merchant,

2 And Auctioneer,
PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
Corner of Great George & King Streets,

QUEEN SQUARE,
JHARLOTTETOWN--- DP. E. ISLAND

Tae Wo. BUNT,
Gommission Merchants,

from 2 p.m to 4 p.m. GENERAL AGENTS AND

UNION BANK.

Grofton St., Queen's Square,
President—CHar.es PALMER, Esquire.
Cashier—James ANDERSON, Esquire.

Discount Days— Wednesdays & Saturdays

jiness—From 10 a.m to 1 pm.
— from 2p.mto 4pm

SUMMERSIDE BANK.
Central Street, Summerside, P. EB. Island

r —Jamus L. Houman, Esq
Lsasciaiepond MoG, Sravent, Esquire.
Discount Days—Tuesdays and Fridays.
Notes for Discount must be

o'clock on Discount days.

Business—10 a. ™m.,
atours of from 2p. ™.,

ROCKLIN HOUSE,
KENT STREET, CHARLOTTETOWN

SIMON D. FRASER, PROPRIETOR.

to lp.m

1" i!

ent and Transient Roardére w

euacee aor House to give satisfaction,
Chitown, June 18, 1868.

Charlottetown

in before 11

to 4 p.m.

AUCTIONEERS.

SALESROOM AND OFFICE

Head Queen's Wharf, Summerside, P. E, I-
(opposite the Store of W. 'T. Hunt & Co.)
April 2, 1869. ly

‘| FTANFORD BROTHERS,

Successors to Thomas Hanford,

Gommission Merthants,
And General Agents,

11 NoNTH MARKET WHARF,

SAINT JOHN, N. B.

Cnas. U. Haxronb. Frev. S. Hanrorp

“JAMES GREENOUGH,
FLOUR

Commission Merchant,

No 47 Commercial Street

Corner of Clinton Street ---------BOSTON
Jany. 1, 1669. ly

SUM-

b@™ Ue can be consulted at his residence

. CAMERON, M. D.,
Phosician, Surgeon,

And Accoucheur,
Office and Residence at N. Woovsipe’s, Esq.,
Alberton, P. Ki. I.
__ August 4th, 1869. : 38m*
GEORGE D. WRIGHT,

WHOLESALE AND RETAIL

DEALER IN

Choice Family Groceries!

Dunn's Block.
Charlottetown, - - P. E. Island.
_ duly 1, 1869. tf sa un

ROBERT GORDON,
AND
LAND BROKER,
Alvevion,.........,2. #. Ikland

REFEREES :
Hon. Judge Young—Charlottetown.

Hon, G, W. Howlan—Alberton,
Mr. Joseph Bertram—Summerside.

Alberton, May 13, 1869,

REUBEN TUPLIN,
Commission Merchant,
AUCTIONEER,

And General Agent,
Margate.............P. &. Island.

REFERENCES ¢
Hon. D. Brennan, R. T. Holman,
Ch. ‘Town. Summerside,
i 1869. pat. pro, 6m

J. H. ALLEN,
Commission 1: erchant,

AND DEALER IN
PROVISIONS, &e.,
MARKET STREET, - ST. JOHN, N. B.

a> Gives personal attention to the Sale
and Purchase of every description of Goods,
May 9, 1868.

THOMAS HALL
S NOW PREPARED, with the assistance

of the SLEAM POWER, to furnish any
number of

THRESHING MACHINES,
of the most improved kind,

Tron Turning, Wood do.,
Trucks, &e., c&e.,
manufactured, together with
Allother Work in his branch of trade
Every Machine warranted to do good work,

THOMAS HALL.
Summerside, May 20, 1869.—tf. co
pHs GIsNUIN
COMMON SENSE
Family Sewing Machine!
FOR
£3 5S. Od.,
AT
HARVIL'S BOOKSTORE,
Charlottetown, and PRINCE COUNTY
BOUKSTORE, Summerside.
June 4, 1869.

BOOT & SHOE
ESTABLISHMENT.

IIE subscriber begs leave to acquaint the

inhabitants of SUMMERSIDE and the
country generally, that he has commenced
his business of Boot & hoe Mak-
img’, in the Shop n. xt door to O. O’ Neill’s,
near the Wesleyan Church, Ile trusts that
by strict attention to business and good work
to give general satisfaction ad merit a share
of public patronage.

Carls,

WILLIAM CLARK.
Summerside, April 22, 1869.

FOUNTAIN HOUSE!

North side King Square, (next to Park Hotel)
Sr. Joun, N. B,

JAMES W- THOMPSON, Proprietor.

TENUE Proprietor of the above HOTEL takes
this opportunity to return thanks for the
liberal patronage hitherto received, and most
respectfully solicits a continuance of the

8 me.
hie TATE + -vey

prewoamery sruumced,
and commands a view of King Square, and
other parts of the City,
In connection with the Hotel, is GooD
STABLING, and a careful Hostler in attend-
ance. Parties coming from Prince Edward
Island with horses will find this establishment
the most comfortable in the City, and a per-
son a ways at the Cars on their arrival,
St. John, Sept 868, ly
bryce Sen: : :
Weaving, Weaving!

New England Self-Acting

HAND LOOM !

Ais Subscriber having procured one of
the above LOOMS, is now prepare 1 to do
Custom WEAVING ofall kinds. Any style
of goods can be done on this Loom, A dozen
different quills can be woven upon the same
warp. Can weave a web 61x feet ten inches
wide, Cloth double width, and Seamless Bays
The best of work guaranteed. No delay, Call
and see the Loom and specimens of work.
Reduced prices for Weaving.
DANIEL D. CREW,

Near the Drill Shed.

Summerside, July 15, 1869.

CRAWFORD'S HOTEL.

NO. 9, KING SQUARE,
SAINT JOHN, N. B.
HE subscriber having thoroughly refitted

and enlarged his HOTEL and STORE, is
now prepared to accommodate Permanent and
‘Transient Boarders on the most reasonable
terms.
ALSO, in connectionsa GROCERY STORE,
where every article required fur house use

may be had,
J. CRAWFORD & SON.

Sept. 10,1868. ly

To Malpeque.

(Written for the Jounnat.]

Wenr. you ever down to Malpeque 1—
Land of butter and of cheeses:

Land of bullocks and big oxen:

Land of battles and of siexes ;

Famed for all that makes it noble,
Famed for farms that none surpasses,
Famous for its handsome women,

On a lovely day near harvest,

When the buckwheat was in blossom,
The potatoes out in flowers,

Wheat und barley looking healthy ;
Everthing that makes man cheery,
God's baght sun diffusing gladness,
Over all bis thankful creatures.

Then it was I went to Malpeque:
Passed the Townshend's quiet corner,—
Quiet this time, but not always-—
Sometines called the Traveller's Resting ;
Rest of Milligan’s and Cotton's,

Rest of Raynor's und of Crossan’s,

Passed along New Annan’s valley,

Suw the fields in all their beauty ;

Suw the gardens and the cattle,

Suw the flowers and fruit delightful ;
Saw the dwellings neat and tidy,

In this country of the Walkere.

Walkers who had come from Scotland
With the Marchl auks’ and with others,
All from Scotlund's Southern Counties,
From Diuuitties and Banks of Ayr;
Cine to this Prince Edward Isluud,
Heard it was a land of promise,

Lund tor farming und for pasture,

With their axes bright and gleaming,
With their bearts and strong arms trusting,
They did cut the mighty hemlock +

‘Trees Unit stood tor many ages;

They did pile, and barn, and clear them,
They did make their homes a gladness 5
Now they bave much money — plenty.

Next we come to lund of Mocses,

Ot the damieson’s und MeMillan's —
Men who trade in mills and cattle,
And of other things most certain,
All to keep their many children,

All to dress their sons and daughters,
All to muke their country richer,

Soon we come to Indian River,
And we stop ene moment passing,
Thinking of its stuiking beauty,
Thinking of its many stories ;
Here the Mohuwk met the Micmac,
Here they fought in deadly battle,
On the banks of * Lijin River,’

On a hill above the cedars,

‘Towering up beyond the fir tops,
Resting firm on rocks of Freestone,—
Rocks that never exn be shaken +

IKkocks that move not by man's doctrine +
Pleasing to the pissing stranger, —
Stands the Ludiau River Chapel.

Here for twenty years and upwards,
Father James, the good and faithtul,

On each Holy Day appomted,

Kuceeling down betore the Altar,

Read to all bis people gathered,

Prayers that they hit live more better,
Prayers to have their sins forgiven,

Now this day it was his list one,

And he spoke to them mort feeling :

Spoke to many hundreds ‘sembled :

Told them he was going to leave them,
eer@uing uway to other Parish,

For to carry on the good work,

In obedience to the Muster,

And he left them all his blessing,
Asked them to be good and gentle,
Kind to strangers and to neighbors,
Not contentious nor be drivking,
Not backbiting ove anothe
Nor forgetting not their prayers,

And they heard him with great sadness,
As he yive them many cautions +

Yold them of their many chances

For to mike their country better,

For to muke themselves more praised :
That Religion great wight prosper,
That the Church might grow in beauty.

Now we enter Ancient Malpeque,
Famed for Poets and Elections,
And for many things besides that;
And we stop to look around us,

As we gaze upon its Churches,

On its flelds and turms most lovely,
On the whole prospect before use

And we enter that old building,

As the people were assembled,

Where their fathers long before them
Used to meet to hear God's word read,
Used to meet to hear the sermon,

Used to meet for praise and prayer.

And their fathers and their prophets,
They that settled ancient Mulpeque,
That did clear its piues and hardwood,
That did bring to Malpeque riches:
They that did instruct lie people—

In its Church-yard now lie sleeping,
Sleeping ull the trump shall sound,

And my mind went back in dreaming,

As I gazed upon the people,

As L looked at the old pulpit,

As L looked at all around me—

How that, when that Church was opened,
Of all them who sang God's praises,
Seurce one worshipper reuuiued,

Now their children take their pluces,
And in pews of antique building,
Made in times before the steamboat
Crossed the deep and mighty ocean :
Listen to the old truths nttered,

Pruths to which Wein iow w eury.
And the preacher from Strathalbyn,

Tn the place of Malpeque's Preacher,
In the pulpit where stood Ki
In that cherished ancient watch-tower,
Spoke this day with words of trembling,
Words of thanktul joy und gladness,
Words of love from the greet yolume,

Out of Denteronomy’s pages

Did the preacher tell them, truly,

That for all the many blessings,

For their tood, and lands, and honees,

For their money and their riches,

For their strength and bealth inall things,
They to God must give the praises,

That when they had eat and drunken,
When their herds and tlocks were many,
Whe they had most handsome wigwame,
When they bad much gold and silver,
When all they had much mult
Not to lilt their hearts too nanghty,
Not forget the band that sent them,

And the people, in their places,

With their sons and danghters round them,
With their hends bowed down and lowly,
Not looking round to see the fashions,
Listened deep to the geod preacher,

Felt their hearts grow warm and better,
‘Aw he told them dearest lesronss

And the people le dismiseed them

To their dinners and their lnnehes,

To their walk among the tombstones,
Where they read from words on marble,
Marble white, and strong, and lusting,
Of the ages of their fathers,

Of their birth and of their dying,

And the intermiesion over,

‘And the sermons they are ended,

We go onto eee the Rivers,

See the Island and the harbors,

Sce Princetown #0 famed in_ etory,
See ite streets, and squares, and shipping,
See Princetown in ail ite glory.

Saw the Islands in the distance,
Suw the Yankee flag outstretching,
O'er the lishing fleet at anchor,
Saw no British tlag in Princetown,
Saw two houses with their inmates,
And another house deserted,

Where the furries dance at midnight:

And our trip to Malpeqne ended,
Howewarde back our track we wended.

Select g¥
That Morrible Chicago.

Will the Women read this Story!

iferuture,

(New York CorresroNDENCE OF THE

Monite Recister.)

I think I remarked in my last letter that
[ once met a Chicago lawyer who warmly
advocated marriage, and who explained
to me his reason for so doing For such
a man to do such a thing, was, to say the
least, surprising. I listened with breath-
less interest while he gave me a brief his-
tory of his experience duwing the first 10
years of his residence in that celebrated
city. Said he:—

**I first came to Chicago 15 years ago.

Then I was young aud innocent, which it
is hardly necessary for me to say that [am
not at present, 1 had a friend living herve
whom | had known while he resided in
New York, and conducted himselt lixe a
civilized man in a civilized community.
As he had written to me to visit himsell
and his wife when I came to Chicago, Lre-
membered the invitation when I did visit
that city, and immediately on my arrival
proceeded to lis house. He was vot at
home just at the moment, and so I asked
to see his wile, whom I had known a year
before in New York. In answerto my
inquiry for Mrs, DeVorse, a pretty, biack-
eyed girl came into the drawing-room and
received me quite warnily,
** Well, wo chatted very pleasantly to-
geather until my friend came in, and 1
really felt myselt beginning to experience
avery affectionate impulse toward her,
supposing of course, that she was his niece,
cousin, uncle, or something of that sort.
But in the course of the evening, L asked
him wether his wite was at home, and il
so, When he proposed to let me see her?
“To my astonishment, he replied:
“This lady is Mrs. DeVorse! I thought
you were already aware of the fact.”

“Ol course 1 blushed and felt horribly
uncomlortable, and said that I was uot
aware that he had lost poor Emily,

«*Oh, said he, ** Emily is very well,
and has miarried a partner of mine, We
were divorced, you know, about six
months ago, and {married my present
wile only lust week.”

“*Weil! I dind't feel quite so affection-
ate toward her alter that, lor 1 had been
warmly attached to Emily; but we said
no more about the matter, and 1 went
away, vowing never to get myse.f into
such a scrape again by asking alter any-
body’s wile, Ldid) not see my friend's
new. wile for about a month alterwards,
until I one day met her in the house of a
mutual acquaintance, aud in the course ot
conversation said tou her: ‘* By the way,
might IL ask you to say to your husband
that 1 want him to come tomy oflice some
day next week ?”

** «1 don’t think you know my husband,”
she replied, smilingly.

*** What do you mean!” said I, getting
rather nervous,

«Why, my new husband is named
Smith,” she answered, ** 1 was seperated
trom Mar, DeVorse, yesterday morning,
and married Mr. Smith last night.”
“left that house pretty rapidly, and
registered a second yow, to the effect
that | would never, to my dying day, ask
a Chicago lady about her husband a,
The two mistakes | had already made
to Chicago wives and husbands, made me
decidedly shy of them, But the very next
day 1 went into De Vorse’s store (corn
pork and provision,) and fonnd him en-
gaged in conversation with a terrible an-
gular female, who looked like a compound
ofa New England old maid, a Western
woman's rights lecturer, and an Arkansas
squatter’s wile. Of course I pitied my
triend, and, when the terrible lemale had
remarked, ‘lL congratulate you on your
escape ; that herrivle female would have
exhausted any man’s patience in ten mo-
ments conversation, What was my hor-
ror when he replied: *L must beg you to
speak more respectfully of that lady; she
is at present my wile—a fact of which you
are, of course, unaware, as We Were mar-
ried very privately Jast night.”

«*T never said a word, but fled abruptly
from his presence. Once more I swore
—and I went belcre a notary, who bad the
biggest kind of a Bible; so as to make the
outh more binding—that, never would |

sak disparagingly of any Chicago, we-
ey better, and for two weeks avoided
making any moie mistakes. At the end
of that time, however, I met the new and
angular Mrs. De Vorse, to who I had,
in the meantime, been introduced, haying
the liveliest hind of a quarrel with a big,
prize-fighting looking fellow, who was
apparently on the point of Knocking her
down, Of course I tlew to her rescue and
demanded to know of the tellow what he
meant; also if he was aware who that
lady was, and who her busband was? ‘To
which he briefly, stentiously, but as it
struck ine, irreleyantly remarked, *Lell!?

*T payed no further attention to him,

but turning to Mrs. De Vorse, said:
+ Madame! permit me to protect you from
that ruflian’s insolence.
«+ Instead of thanking me, she actually
slapped my face, and said: ‘Vil teach
you to interfere between man and wile.
That's my husband, and we've been mar-
ried three days. Ivs a pretty bard thing
if a wile can’t speak to her husband with-
out having some idiot come and niake a
muss about it,”

** Now, continued the lawyer, ‘‘ this is
not only a true story, but itis a fair ex-
ample of the continued trouble that aman
gets into who lives in Chicago, and dosen't
know how to hold his tongue, You now
understand why I hate the Chicago cus-
stoms, and why 1 go in for indissoluble
marriages. Inever made a mistake in
asking aman about his wife the whole
time I lived in New York, but here L have
got into more awkward places, and had
more fights than | can count, just because

How Smith Asked the OldMan.

(To BE READ aLoup.]

Smith had just asked Mr, Thompson's
daughter it she would: give him a lift out
of bachelordom, and she had said ‘ Yes.”

It therefore became absolutely necessary
to gct the old gentleman’s permission, so.
as Smith said, the arrangement might b—
made to hop the conjugal twig.

Smith said he’d rather pop the interroga-
tory to all of old Thompson’s daughters,
and his sisters. and his lady cousins, ans
his aunt Hannah, in the country, and the
whole of the female relations, than ask old
Thompson, But it bud to be done, and
so he sat down and studied out a speech
which he was todis.orge at old Thompson
the very first time he got a shy at him,
So Smith dropped in on him ope Sunday
evening, wheu all the family had meanders
ed around to meeting, and found him
doing a sum in beer measure,

* How are you, Smith?” said old
Thompson, as the former walked in, white
as a piece of chalk, and trembling as if he
had swallowed a condensend earthquake,
Smith was atraid to answer, ‘cause he
wan't sure about that speech. He knew
he had to keep his grip on it while he had
it there, or it would slip from him quicker
than an oiled cel through an angular bole,
So he blurted out—

«Mr. ‘hompson, sir: Perhaps it may
not be unknown to you,that during an ex-
tended period of some tive years, 1 have
been busily engaged in the prosecution of
a commercial cuterprise—”

‘*Is that so, and keepin’ it a secret all
this time, while 1 thought you were tend-
in? store? Well, by George, you're one
of them now, ain't you?”

Smith had begun to. think it all over
again, to get the run of it.

* Mr. Thompson, sir; Perhaps it may
not be unknown to you, that during the
extended period of five years, I have been
buisly engaged in the prosecution of a
commercial enterprise, with the determin-
ation to secure a suflicient maintenance—”

* Sit down, Smith, and help yoursell to
beer. Don’t be standin’ there holdin’ your
hat, like w blind beggar, with paralysis
I never have seen you behave yoursell so
queer in all my born days.”

Smith had been knocked out again, and
so he had to wander back again and take
afresh start.
Mr. ‘Lhompson, sir:
known to you, that during an extended
period of tive years, I have been engaged
i the prosecution of a commercial enter-
prise, with the determination to procure a
sullicient maintenance—”
‘+A which ance ?” asked old Thompson ;
but Sinith held on to the last word: as it it
was his only chance, and went on:
‘Inthe hope that some day J might
enter wedlock, and bestow my eaithly
possessions upon one who I could cull my
own, Ihave been a lonely man, sir, wand
have felt that itis not good for man to be
alone; therelore | would—”
Neither is it, Smith; Pm glad you
dro, ped in, Liow’s the old man?”
‘Mr. ‘Lhompson, sir,” said Smith, in
despairing contusion, raising bis voice toa
yell, ‘tit muy not be unknown to youthat,
during an extended period of a lonely man,
Lhave been engaged to enter wedlock,
and bestow my cuterprise on one whom [
could determine to be good for certain
possessions — no, I mean — that — Mr,
Lhowpson, sir; itmay not be uuknown—”
* And then, again, it may. Look here,

It may be un-

;| Smith; you'd better lay down and take

sometuing warm—you ain't well,”

Smith, sweating like a four year old
colt, went in again,

“Mr. Thompson, sir: It may not be
lonely to you to prosecute me whom you
adriend, tara commercial maintenance,
but—but--ch—dang it—Mr, ‘Lhompson,
sir: lti—

Ob, Smith, you talk like a fool. I
never seen a first class idiot in the course
of my whole life, Whats the matter with
you, anyhow ??

** Mr. Thompson, sir,” said Smith, in an
agony of bewilderment, ‘it may not be
known that you prosecuted a lonly mun
who is not good tor a commercial period
ol wedlock tor some five years, but—”

“See here, Mr, Smith, you're drunk,
and it you can’t bebave better than that,
you'd better leave; if you don't, Pil chuck
you out, or Pm a Dutchman.”

‘+ Mr, ‘Thompson, sir,” said Smith, fran-
tic with despair, "tit may not be uuknown
to you that my earthly possessions are en-
gaged to erter Wodlock five years with w
sufdciently fonely man, who is not good
for a commercial maintenance—”

«The very deuce ho isn’t. Now, you
jist git up und git, or PH knock what hue
bras out OL you you've got lett.”

With that, ol Lhompson took Smith
and shot hiin into the streets us it he’d rua
him against a lucomotive, going out at tue
rate of forty miles an hour. Getore old
Vhompson bad time to shut the tront door
Suiith collected his legs and one thing and
another that were lying around on the
pavement, arrauged himself in a vertical
position, and yelled out;

Mr. ‘Phompson, sir: It may not be
known to you’—which made the old man
so wretched mid that he went out and set
a bull terrier on Smith betore ae had a
chance to lilta brogan, and there was a
scientific doglight, with odds in fayor ot
the dog, for ne had au awiul hold for such
a small auinal,

Smith afterwards married the girl, and
lived happily about two months. At the
end of that time he told a confidental
triend that he would willingly take mere
trouble and undergo a million more dog-
bites to get rid of her,

— eee

’

“When I was quite a boy,” says Smith,
“my futher ordered a coat tor me from an
old Israelite, and when the garment came
home it was very much too large. Lhe per-
plexed Jew, after vainly trying to gather up
the fulness in the back with lis hand, sv that
the front might set tight, declared at length

that ‘'de coat was goot; it was no fault of te
coat; te coat fit good “nough, but te poy was
too slim!” Jewish logic!

no man or woman stays married more| The late election in Tennessee resulted in
the triumph of the Conservative or Liberal

than a month at furthest.” Republican party by a majority of about 50
r e phat! a ~
We drank weak lemonade together in On, and the election in Kentucky resulted in
so.emn thoughtlulness, and [ parted from| 4 pemucr. tic mejority estimated at over 5u,+
him with the feeling that bad as itis to be| yoo, Ltis supposed that the victory of the
indissolubfy connected with an unpleasant| Liberals in ‘Tennessee secures the election of
mother-in-law, it is better than to be con-| ex-President Jounson to the United States
stantly bothered by # change of wile, Senate’ ,